


Everything I Don't Deserve

by Ryuchan20



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Anal Sex, Blowjobs, Bottom Hanzo Shimada, Brotherly Bonding, Canon-Typical Violence, Consensual Sex, Drunk Sex, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feeling denial, Fingering, Flashbacks, Friends to Lovers, Genji and Hanzo have a relationship to repair, Hanzo doesn't think he deserves happiness, Hanzo is just a mess in general, Kinda I guess Jesse gets into a bad emotional state, M/M, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Strangers to Lovers, Takes place after recall, Top Jesse McCree, canon-verse, even the drunk sex is very consentual, tags update as i go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-27
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2019-02-22 18:23:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 13
Words: 46,984
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13172628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ryuchan20/pseuds/Ryuchan20
Summary: Four years before the recall Hanzo met Jesse but they didn't know just exactly who each other were. shrouded in fake names and alcohol they spent one night together that stuck with them both despite parting. Now four years later the agents of Overwatch have come together and Hanzo has joined their ranks as a means to atone for what he did to Genji. However, despite learning to live his life more freely he still cannot forgive himself and when a certain Cowboy comes back to Overwatch and identities are revealed he struggles to keep their relationship professional. He fails.





	1. Four Years Ago

**Author's Note:**

> NEW FIC! So I've had this one rolling around in my head for a long while and now I'm going for it. I'm a sucker for mutual pining so that's mostly what this fic is though I do delve into Hanzo's inner struggle with himself and also repairing his relationship with Genji.
> 
> Be prepared for a lot of sexual tension and a bit of pain. This relationship isn't so clearcut and while sex happens it doesn't magically make the relationship happen which was something I really wanted to explore with these two. Hope you all enjoy.
> 
> I plan to update every Sunday  
> However extra chapters may be posted through the week.

 

In the time between the day he made the greatest mistake in his life to now he felt as if he'd lived several lifetimes plagued by that same memory. However, there was one day he never would forget for another reason. That day, over four years ago. He'd felt particularly weary as if a cloud was following him. It was only a matter of time before another assassin presented themselves. The Shimada were in excess of them. He'd meet his would-be killer, he'd win and he'd live carrying the burden he would never quite shake. Such was the cycle he lived. He almost forgot where he was, what country, city. He moved so much, following the work of a mercenary because what else could he do? He was a killer, with the blood of his own family on his hands. What other life suited him then that of a weapon for hire?

 

The bar wasn't anything special. It was a hole in the wall, barely recognizable from every other shop that was closed, the lights inside off, leaving the windows dark. The bar was the only place light seemed to come from with a half open door, a few men out front talking loudly, and an equal amount of noise inside. It was perfect. He slipped in the door, deciding to hide there for now since he did not feel like sleep yet. He found it hard to sleep some nights. This was one of those nights.

 

The inside of the bar was smokey and he could barely make out the back of the room through the smoke. There were several men around a table playing cards, most of the noises seemed to come from there. Others were in the back throwing darts while a few huddled around a pool table. Whatever chatter there was it seemed designated to those areas leaving the bar quiet except for a few patrons happy to sit in silence. He opted for there and went to go sit down. He slipped his bag with his bow and quiver off his shoulder and placed it on the floor, looping one foot around the strap just in case. He ordered a drink, a little annoyed he couldn't seem to find any sake lately. He missed the taste of home.

 

“Surprise me.” he muttered, regretting it the second the bartender slid a small glass with a dark amber liquid. He took a sip and felt it burn down his throat sharply. Coughing faintly he begrudgingly took another sip. It was better than nothing. The effect was the same. He felt a burn in his gut, a warmth through his limbs and a brief sensation of being relaxed though nothing ever truly gave him peace.

 

Hanzo was not sure what caused him to glance over, perhaps it was instinct since he'd failed to truly check his surroundings after sitting down. That was the moment he saw something very unlike anything he'd seen in real life. He did not think he traveled that far west, but sitting at the bar was a cowboy. He watched the man lift a glass to his lips, the hand holding it a prosthetic and well made. The glass clinked as it hit the bar and Hanzo's eyes followed it before going back up and feeling himself tense when sharp brown eyes met his own.

 

The cowboy stared back, a slightly haggard look about him. He had shaggy brown hair that peeked out from under his raggedy hat and a beard that was a bit unruly but obviously trimmed and taken care of. Hanzo noted that despite the worn appearance there seemed to be an air of pride in it, perhaps how the man carried himself as he sat upright and turned his body slightly toward him before grinning just a little. “You need something there, partner?” A rich, deep voice spilled from the man's lips, tinged with a little drawl that Hanzo could not quite place. It was not entirely the equivalent of a southern American accent but it resembled it. Perhaps something he had not quite heard before.

 

Staring back at the stranger he tilted his head as he took him in. “I just have never seen a real cowboy in person. I was worried I was hallucinating.” His own voice sounded a bit hoarse, years of speaking very little to anyone.

 

The cowboy blinked and stared before his smirk cracked into a full smile and he let out a hearty chuckle. “Well now, that's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all week.” He sighed and got up, moving to slip past the two stools that were between them and sat down right next to Hanzo. “I think that means I'm required to buy you a drink. What are you having?” He gestured to the glass Hanzo still held in hand.

 

He looked at the cup and his brow furrowed. “To be honest I am not sure. It's awful though.” he ignored the look the bartender shot their way and turned his attention back to the man who seemed more than happy to get into his personal space. Well that wasn't entirely it. He was only in the next seat but he was the closest Hanzo had let another person get to him for an extended period of time and for some reason he was not alarmed by it at all.

 

That got another laugh from the strange cowboy. “It's probably the cheap stuff. You gotta get the higher end whiskey if you want a real bite.” he winked and ordered them another two glasses, taking the one from Hanzo's hand and slipping his other hand there in one fluid motion. With a firm handshake and a tip of his hat the man smiled once more. “Name's McCree. Jesse McCree.”

 

Hanzo was left stunned. He should of automatically reacted the second the man touched him. He should have grabbed his arm and quickly removed it or even subdued him but he felt no need to. The motion was gentle and oddly welcoming and he gave the other man's hand a little squeeze and shake in return before muttering the first name he could think of. “Shima.”

 

“Just that?” McCree raised his brows as if waiting for more.

 

Hanzo nodded.

 

“Fair enough.” McCree shrugged and glanced over as two glasses were passed down the bar to them. He took one and raised it. “Well then, pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

 

Slowly Hanzo took the glass meant for him and nodded, taking a sip carefully. It was...not nearly as bad as the last one. It still burned terribly and left his throat feeling more hoarse than before but it went down smooth.

 

“Good, right?” McCree murmured.

 

“Depends on your definition of good.” He cleared his throat. “It's better than the last glass but I would not classify it as good.” Perhaps if he drank enough of it he'd forget how bad it tasted. Or perhaps his taste buds would burn away and it wouldn't matter.

 

McCree only laughed and took another large drink, hissing back a breath after he swallowed. “Suppose folks have different requirements of alcohol.” He muttered and glanced back at Hanzo. “So, Shima, what's a guy like you doing in a bar like this?”

 

“Apparently drinking terrible alcohol.” he retorted, smirking a little himself.

 

“Touche.” Another deep laugh. It was rather charismatic. “So then you stopped in for a drink and then...?”

 

He hesitated to answer. It became apparent that this man could be an assassin. A different breed than what he was used to but he wouldn't rule it out. He noted the gun holstered to the man's hip, the sharp look in his eyes. This man was dangerous if he wanted to be. “Then I am not sure.” he finished the sentence. “I did not feel like sleep and this place was open.”

 

A long pause followed that and for a moment Hanzo was worried the man would make his move but instead when he turned to Jesse McCree he found the man staring at his own glass. “Same actually. What a coincidence.” Looking up those brown eyes held something that had been concealed till then. Was it sadness, regret? It felt as if Hanzo was staring into a mirror for a brief moment. “Sometimes sleep is the last thing I wanna do.”

 

He looked away, staring at the left over alcohol on his glass. The liquid was not really interesting but it was enough distraction. He felt exposed for some reason. As if the other voiced his own thoughts. “So is that what this is for?” he shifted the glass. “Drink enough and maybe sleep will come and go without you knowing?”

 

“Yeah.” McCree smirked. “Isn't that what you're hoping too?”

 

Hanzo could not answer. He could only stare at the cowboy, feeling as if his soul was being exposed, or was it the other man exposing his?

 

McCree seemed to understand his silence and turned to the bartender asking for the whole bottle and tossing some money down before refilling their glasses. “Guess we better get a move on. I'm still wide awake.”

 

He let out a weak laugh, staring at the liquid before taking the entire glass down. Assassin or no he realized he was tired but not in the way they were speaking of before. He was tired of being careful. He was tired of running. He simply wished to pretend nothing existed for just a little while. So he drank and every time the glass emptied it was refilled, and McCree would smile as he talked about some unbelievable tale that Hanzo swore must be made up. Such a strange situation. Despite all his worries he did not feel threatened by the man. No, it was more like kindred spirits. Perhaps that was why he stayed seated, drinking and listening.

 

“So then the boss hits the switch and the fuse doesn't light and the train is coming down the track fast. We don't have time to redo this so I take out my gun and aim and hit the charges and BOOM, the whole bridge goes just in time.” He threw his hands out, half spilling his drink as he tried to show the size of the apparent explosion.

 

“From that far away?” Hanzo drawled skeptically, resting his cheek on a hand.

 

“I swear on my mama, I did it. A totally perfect shot.” Jesse crossed his heart and sat upright.

 

“Hmmm.” Hanzo was still unsure but let it drop. “So then what?”

 

“Well, we robbed the train.” The cowboy said bluntly. “That part wasn't as exciting. It's always the planning of the heist I liked. Well, back then. Kinda fell outta that after getting into some trouble. Now I'm tryin' to do right by the world.”

 

“Is that so? And what is it a man like you does to make things right?” Hanzo narrowed his eyes, his vision a bit blurry. He forgot what number glass he was on and the bottle was nearly empty.

 

Jesse smiled. “I used to be something of a hero but...that's sorta behind me now too.” Slowly he raised the drink to his lips and hesitated for a moment.

 

“Hm?” He titled his head, leaning closer to Jesse. “So then what do you do now?”

 

The drink was lowered back to the bar and Jesse turned to him and smiled. “Now? I sit in bars and drink with handsome men apparently.”

 

He tried to stop the smile but couldn't entirely. “Seems an awful waste of time.” His eyes felt heavy and he felt unsteady but he leaned in closer.

 

“I don't know, Darlin'. Can't think of a better way to spend an evening honestly.” His voice was low and smooth, like honey. “You don't seem like you are in a hurry to leave me to my own devices anyways.”

 

“You assume a lot, Cowboy.” Hanzo muttered a bit slurred but smiled back. “I could just be using you for the free drinks.”

 

Jesse chuckled. “And I could be using you just for the eye candy so I say it's a win win on both parts.” The compliment was followed by a slow glance over from the man. “I gotta say though you really are easy on the eyes. I was a bit at a loss when I looked over and you were just staring at me.”

 

Swallowing hard he looked down. “I told you, I was sure I was hallucinating. A cowboy was sitting a few seats down from me in some backwoods dive bar.”

 

“Hate the break it to ya, Darlin', but,” Jesse leaned closer, “You aren't exactly inconspicuous yourself.” He gestured to his clothes.

 

Opening his mouth to retort he decided against it. “Be that as it may...”

 

“I ain't complaining. I like it. Definitely gives me a lot to look at.” His gaze was not coy in the way it ogled Hanzo but it was not unwelcome.

 

“You're very bold.” Hanzo murmured softly and allowed his own gaze to wander freely this time. He'd given the man a look over as a means to trying to determine his character but this time it was a different look. This time he appreciated how handsome the man was even under his rugged exterior.

 

“You're staring again.” Jesse spoke softly, somehow even closer.

 

Hanzo looked up, staring into Jesse's eyes, feeling a pull he could not entirely ignore. “I am. And?”

 

Reaching out, Jesse's fingers ran over the top of Hanzo's hand as he held his gaze. “I like it.” If it was possible for a voice to resemble a purr then that was it. “Kinda thinkin' we might wanna end the drinks and find a place for the night.”

 

His brows rose. “We?”

 

“Yeah.” He seemed so confident. “What? You weren't thinking of taking me back to a room? That's not what that look is saying.”

 

“I wasn't....denying anything.” He corrected, his nerves tensing but not out of fear of danger but excitement. “Do you have a room?”

 

“Not yet but I'm pretty sure the place across the street has a vacancy.” A look of pure delight lit up Jesse's face and it was impossible to refuse now.

 

“Lead the way then.”

 

\-------------------------------------

 

 

The door slammed shut but he was far too busy with the sensation of Jesse's mouth on his. There was a strange needy urgency in it and he gasped faintly before responding with as much insistence. The entire moment was a blur. They'd come across the street and got a room and before they'd even made it inside the urge to cross that invisible line they'd been dancing around became too much. For every rough grip at his body and clothes he returned ten fold, tugging and fumbling with Jesse's clothes as they stumbled to the bed. His head was spinning with the heat of the alcohol and the forbidden ache of needing to be touched. The desire for human contact, to feel alive, was burning in him. He shouldn't want it. He didn't deserve it but for a moment he couldn't stop himself.

 

The room spun as he fell back on the bed, the large and rough body over him smelling of smoke and alcohol. He groaned and arched his head back, feeling kisses and gentle bites along his skin. His hands sought to touch, to pull him closer. “Jesse...” The name fell from his lips, the only name he even bothered remembering at the moment. Hanzo tugged the man back up, seeking his lips, falling back into the impatient kiss that made his head spin more. It blocked out all other thought. For a moment there was no Shimada clan. or duty, or burdens, just them in this room. He wasn't a fallen heir, a brother murderer or even the empty person he'd been for years now. He wished it could have lasted.

 

\------------------------------------

 

When the sun was rising he woke, dressing and gathering his things. Glancing back at the bed he saw Jesse still sound asleep. He wished he could be there. His head hurt and he felt as if he might throw up but he could not say. If he stayed he'd want to keep staying and this was not something he was allowed. One night was enough. For a little while he'd felt like a person. Picking up his bag he started for the door but stopped to look back. Everything in him told him to leave but a little part wished to pretend the other would care he was gone. So he wrote a simple note, a sentence really, that might convey the weight of this all. He slipped it on he bedside table and then left before he changed his mind. It was enough. A good memory amidst the bleakness of what was to be his life. He did wonder how long that would be. With every assassin sent for him he expected one would eventually finish him. He realized he wouldn't entirely be upset about it. Sometimes he even hoped it'd happen soon because he was too much of a coward to end himself.

 


	2. The Recall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hanzo finally decides to Join Overwatch but is this really the path to redemption? Is he even wanted? He finds himself more confused the deeper he gets pulled in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BONUS CHAPTER UPDATE!
> 
> Yup, I got a bit if a writing bug so Chapter 2 is coming out tonight. I'm most of the way through chapter 3 and if this keeps up I may post the next chapter tomorrow night and save chapter 4 for the Sunday scheduled update.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!

 

It wasn't exactly sure how he'd expected things to go. The shock of Genji being alive was still not over and despite his brother asking him if he wished to try and redeem himself he'd hesitated. He responded that he would think about it and then dragged his feet. He took less and less mercenary jobs, began to take in the world more instead of keeping his gaze faced toward his back. The world was changing, Genji had been right. He could see the unrest once he paid attention. He'd never tried to over think the omnic and human issue. He'd believed himself above it but he was no longer in a world removed from it. He lived in it.

 

In an attempt to shed the person he'd been, to try once again to properly redeem himself he let go of who Hanzo Shimada had been. He was not Hanzo Shimada the heir, and he was not Hanzo Shimada the mercenary. He wasn't sure who he was without those things though. How did someone go about discovering that?

 

The first change was cutting his hair, shaving the sides and wearing it differently. The piercings just happened. He'd been passing a piercing parlor and walked in and came out with studs in his ear and a bridge piercing in his nose. For the first while he was a bit startled when he saw himself in the mirror, thinking he seemed to be acting like Genji. Eventually he felt a bit lighter, smiling a bit at the freedom it granted him. He wasn't bound by anything now. He'd never gotten the chance to do these things in the past. He'd had to set an example as the heir while Genji got away with piercings and dying his hair. He smiled a bit at the memory, recalling how furious their father had been when Genji came home with bright green hair. Their father never stayed angry at Genji long though, softening the second his brother smiled sheepishly. He'd always envied his brother that. Hanzo had always maintained a certain composure, only relaxing when Genji was around but was mindful to hide any frivolous actions. While Genji could get away with almost anything it seemed he was not so fortunate. It was funny how a privileged life could feel so confining when he thought of it.

 

Perhaps confining was what was meant for him. There was no telling what awaited him with the newly recalled Overwatch. It was very possible it would be just as it was with the Shimada clan. A place where his life was dictated by others. His jaw stiffened. As much as he wanted to resist against such a life again did he really have a right to want more? This was the path to redemption Genji had shown him. He should follow it. His brother had not granted him death, despite how he'd tried to antagonize him into it. Genji was...he was not the same person. His little brother was not the same man who's body was only half human now. A reminder of his past actions.

 

He gripped the strap of the bag that held his bow and took the first step. He'd follow this path regardless of where it lead.

 

Overwatch was a far cry from it's glory days and their members were few. Granted the Gorilla Winston had said others could arrive any day. Over the last six months many members started returning or made contact. One of the first was Lena Oxton, or Tracer as she liked to be called. His brother had also come along with an Omnic monk named Zenyatta that he warmly called Master. Hanzo had been closed off at first, finding anything regarding Genji's actions strange and jarring. Even things that seemed familiar were odd to him. Maybe a very small part of Hanzo had felt as though it was a lie. The man in the cybernetic body was not his brother. Yet, small gestures and turns of phrases reminded him that it was.

 

Within the first week of Hanzo being at the base in Gibraltar they were joined by a scientist named Mei-Ling Zhou. Her arrival was apparently a surprise and full of much curiosity and hugs. He'd felt like an outsider more than usual that day. He'd hung around the sidelines, hearing a heartbreaking tale of how she woke up to find her fellow scientists dead. Malfunctioning cryopods. He had no words to offer her as Lena hugged her or Winston voiced his condolences. His eyes darted around the room as even his brother and the omnic Zenyatta spoke.

 

When he was introduced to her she seemed thrilled to find Genji's brother had arrived and he wondered if she had a clue what he had done. He knew Winston knew as well as Lena. They were both unable to hide the awkwardness that hung in the air when they spoke to him. However, the worst meeting took place two weeks later when a blond woman arrived, an almost motherly concern in her voice as she seemed to scold Winston for doing something so reckless as recalling Overwatch. Regardless of her reluctance she'd had a smile on her face as she greeted everyone. He'd once again hung around the outside of the circle of former companions until Genji grabbed his arm and tugged him over.

 

“Angela, this is my brother Hanzo.” Genji had not been shy to introduce his brother to everyone, acting normal despite some being wary.

 

Wary was not what Angela was though. She paused, staring at Genji with worry before looking at Hanzo, her eyes full of fear and distress.

 

She knew.

 

Hanzo's jaw stiffened and his mind screamed for Genji to let him go. His brother held firm though so he managed a very faint head nod.

 

Angela nodded as well, looking back at Genji. “It is good to see you are well, Genji. I trust everything is in working order.”

 

“Yes, thank you. I have had no troubles.” Genji's grip loosened on Hanzo's arm and the older Shimada took that chance to pull away, muttering an excuse as he left.

 

________________________________

 

 

Within the first week he'd quickly found a spot he usually could be alone. Above the training room were several rooftops and perches that few could reach. He was there now, watching the ocean through the fog that had rolled in. He felt...cold. It was easy to almost forget his place at times but there was always something to pull him back. The look on that woman's face told him everything. From the brief conversation he found she was a doctor and judging from how she spoke to Genji...

 

“You don't need to hide up here.” Genji's robotic voice called to him. It held much of the same tones as it had many years ago but there was also something unnatural about it. He hated it.

 

“I felt it would be better if I excused myself.” He muttered flatly, not turning.

 

Genji didn't speak as he walked closer, his steps quiet despite the body he was in.

 

“That woman,” Hanzo said softly, struggling to find words to say what he wanted to ask.

 

“Angela?”

 

“She is your doctor?” He said the phrase with hidden meaning, asking a question he realized he could not ask outright.

 

His brother was quiet again before answering. “Yes.”

 

“I see.”

 

It seemed like too long a moment before Genji sat next to him. “When I came here I was...bad off. Angela saved me.”

 

Hanzo did not want to discuss this. The idea that she had seen what he'd done so intimately made the emotions behind her expression worse. She knew what he'd done and her reaction seemed to bring it back so vividly he swore he felt the blood on his hands, the grip of the sword in his hand.

 

“I owe her much. She even oversaw my cybernetic work and made sure everything functioned correctly. She's a very talented doctor. I am glad she chose to come back to Overwatch.” Genji kept speaking as if nothing was amiss.

 

“Perhaps it is unwise that I am here.” He finally said, interrupting his brother.

 

That seemed to catch Genji's attention and he turned to Hanzo. “What? Why?”

 

“Do not play dumb. You saw how she looked at me. I am...unwelcome. Even the others are wary of me. With such a small group distrust cannot be afforded.” He's resisted looking at Genji, wanting to pretend that the person next to him would have his brother's face instead of that visor that shielded the scarred face he'd caused. Now he turned, his expression as impassive as he could make it. “I will only hinder things.”

 

“Hanzo.” Genji reached out, placing a cold hand on his shoulder. “There is no need for that. I will speak to Angela as I have the others. She will understand and respect my decision.”

 

He snorted, smiling wryly. “Your decision. That you've forgiven me? I wonder how far that will go. Perhaps the others don't truly know but they'll surely find out. I am not so naive as to think my deeds are so easily undone by your forgiveness.”

 

“I did not say they were undone but I have forgiven you, Hanzo. I have told you many times now. My only wish is that you also forgive yourself and move forward. Move on from the path of destruction you walked.” The hand on Hanzo's shoulder squeezed gently.

 

“I am here, am I not?”

 

“Yes,” The tone was almost sad. “Yes, you are here but I wonder if your guilt is still the driving force.”

 

“And why shouldn't it be?” Hanzo snapped, pulling back. “You give forgiveness too easily. Showing up after so long, wearing the guise of understanding and maturity that I do not know.” He closed his eyes tightly. “You forgive me? I cannot fathom why.”

 

“It was not an easy path, brother. I did not forgive you instantly. It took much time and guidance to reach peace with myself and what transpired in our past.” How was Genji's voice so calm? The Genji Hanzo knew would have spit venom and fire at him, his words cutting as deep as any blade when he wanted to. “What I want now is for you to also find that peace. I wish for us to become brothers once more, as we were when we were young.”

 

“Impossible.” He did not mean for that one word to carry such edge but even thinking of their childhood opened old wounds. Genji had been his wild, wayward brother. The one that was overlooked for transgressions Hanzo would have been reprimanded for. Where Genji's cage was left open for him to come and go as he pleased Hanzo's was left open as an act of cruelty. He could leave if not for the chain around his neck and the empty praise he received for performing the tricks the clan asked of him.

 

Perhaps he and Genji had been close as children but that small crack that formed as they reached adolescence had grown into a wide chasm Hanzo could not imagine crossing.

 

“Brother, it is not too late to change your course. You can redeem your life here with us, with me.” Genji reached out again but Hanzo recoiled.

 

“You are mistaken. I am beyond redemption. I am here at your request. Nothing more and nothing less.” He quickly stood, wanting to end this conversation. Things still felt too fresh and raw. All his months of traveling and rediscovering himself seemed pointless when he spoke to Genji. He still felt that crippling guilt in his heart that had caused him to abandon his home and clan.

 

“You are not though.” Genji stood, grabbing his arm again but with more caution. “Hanzo, things do not have to be this way. We are no longer under the clan's influence.”

 

“And when were you ever under their influence?” An ember of anger he'd held onto seemed to flare up. A small hint of resentment he'd stifled as best he could. “Despite father's requests, despite my own you did as you pleased with little care for the consequences.” Yes, perhaps he had grown to resent Genji back then. A part of him had felt such envy at his little brother's freedom. Forgiveness was given to Genji so easily by the family. Forgiveness that was never given to him. He did not understand the feeling. Every error was followed with a lesson or reprimand, a comment of disappointment that reminded him he had to do better. When Genji spoke of forgiveness he had no idea how to accept it.

 

Forgiveness was as foreign to him as this place and the people here. It was something that did not belong to him, that did not fit him.

 

Genji had grown quiet, taking in Hanzo's words with more care than he would have years ago. “I am a different person from before though I have not forgotten what my actions caused. My youth was full of many careless mistakes and unkindness.”

 

“Yes, it was. I wondered if you thought yourself invincible given how brazenly you disobeyed everyone.” His expression hardened. “Even your dealings with Overwatch were not discreet in the least.”

 

“What?” Finally an emotion besides calm and understanding. Genji actually sounded startled.

 

“Did you think I did not know? That father hadn't? The elders hadn't?” His body went rigged as he stared down the cyborg, his brother's expression hidden from him. “When father passed the elders could no longer be quelled. They demanded retribution for your disobedience.” Turning he came closer to the man, staring him down. “And despite my warnings, despite my attempts to tell you to control yourself you continued till I had no choice.” He'd fought so long to hide that his brother was feeding Overwatch information. He told himself Genji was merely being careless, not openly betraying them. Betraying him. In the end he had been given an ultimatum. At the time he truly had felt he had only one course. “Tell me, Genji, was the price of disobedience worth it?”

 

The cyborg remained physically impassive but the voice that spoke was truly Genji. “I do not know, brother. Was the price of obedience worth it?”

 

There it was, the Genji he knew. The Genji who so brazenly could speak words that pierced Hanzo deeper than any blade. It had been with that voice he'd laughed off Hanzo's warnings, shirked his duties, threw everything on his older brother because Hanzo was the heir, the one bound by duty.

 

Swallowing hard he stepped back, the animosity that had welled up between them immediately fizzling out. Despite everything, despite his resentment and anger towards his brother it was all trivial compared to his own actions. With a shaky breath he responded. “No, no it was not. Nothing was worth _that_.” His eyes met Genji's, at least he thought so. His brother had been a reckless wild child but he was his little brother. He was the one who had offered to sit at his side when Hanzo was reprimanded for his failures. The one who'd held his hand when he'd gotten sick and his father and mother were too busy to be at his side. The day he killed Genji he realized he had killed that last softness in his life. Even if they only argued when they spoke those last few years Hanzo always believed Genji would support him when he needed it.

 

He turned, unable to continue this conversation.

 

“Hanzo, I...”

 

He held up a hand. “No, do not give me more of your forgiveness.” He didn't want anymore of this. If this proved anything it was that they were still at odds with one another to some degree. Genji may be a changed man but their bond was no closer to being what it might have been. They were too different. While Genji had found peace, Hanzo had found a cheap imitation. It was what he deserved. He left the roof, grateful Genji did not follow. He did not want him to. For the hundredth time since they'd reunited at Hanamura he questioned why Genji had not simply killed him.

 

________________________________

 

 

He assumed Genji had spoken to Doctor Ziegler since she had softened a little. Of course he did not ever let himself be alone anywhere with her. Their interaction was professional and brief and he preferred it that way. He trained on his own and attended meetings. The need to try and reach out to more ex agents or possible candidates became their main focus. There was mutterings of some members who still had not returned and talk of new ones arriving. It all flowed over him. He had no contacts he could call on and he did not know the old members.

 

Another person arrived at the end of the second month since his arrival. A firmly built woman with striking dark hair and stern features. She carried herself like a soldier though seemed to devolve into a sheepish mess as she spoke with some of the other members. Fareeha Amari. The last name was vaguely familiar. If he remembered correctly there had been an Amari who was the second in command of Overwatch in it's glory days. It was shortly after he was introduced to her that he learned that the name had been Ana Amari and Fareeha was her daughter. It was almost endearing how excited the woman was to be apart of this ragtag group. He imagined much stemmed from some childish idealism surrounding her mother.

 

Once again he excused himself, missing as the conversation turned to them speaking of another agent they hoped would return. He didn't care. Two months he'd been here and so far he'd fought with Genji and been subjected to several awkward meet and greets. A great start at redeeming himself.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Another cluster of weeks later he had just finished a session in the training room and went to climb up on the roof to sit and cool off. His eyes scanned the clear horizon, glad he could see the ocean clearly today. His gaze slid along the rocky edge of the cliff along the base when he saw a figure. It was just a blip of red but the gait of the walk and the shape of the body was not one he recognized. It could be another member but they'd had a recent meeting about Talon and how their activity seemed to be picking up. He could not afford to take chances. He quickly moved to scale down the cliff, keeping an eye on the figure as it moved around the perimeter. Athena should have detected him, right? He hoped so, hitting the ground silently and keeping his bow close to him. Closer he was able to make them out better. It was a man, large in stature, a thickness to him that was not simply the result of the red cloth wrapped around him or the hat. Hanzo vaguely thought he looked like a cowboy and that brought up a memory he only allowed himself to think about on his worst nights, when he needed that small comfort.

 

Shaking it from his mind he crept up on them as they walked toward the main doors. Drawing his bow he positioned himself behind the man.

 

The sound of the bowstring being drawn back seemed to be enough noise for the stranger to hear and slowly his hands rose, one covered by a glove, one prosthetic. Hanzo again felt a strange familiarity wash over him.

 

“Easy now.” The voice drawled, thick and deep with a warm amusement in it. “Thought this place was supposed to be abandoned.”

 

“It is. Which makes your presence here more curious.” He kept his voice steady and stern. Was this a returning member?  


“That it does, seeing as Overwatch ain't even supposed to be around no more. 'Less of course they were called back.” The stranger hadn't turned yet, remaining still.

 

Hanzo's hand relaxed a little then. So then this man had been recalled? “That would make your presence make more sense, if you are who you say.”

 

The man chuckled. “Well, funny thing is I ain't said who I am yet.” He started to turn. “See the names McCree. Jesse-” As he turned, speaking his name, he met Hanzo's eyes and the words died in his throat. It didn't matter because Hanzo did not need him to finish. He'd heard it before, four years ago in a small dive bar.

 

His heart caught in his throat, the man before him looking exactly the same despite his even scruffier appearance. Hanzo's lips parted, his voice speaking the name as if it were a secret. “Jesse?”

 

Jesse McCree stared back at him equally shocked. Their reunion something neither of them had expected to ever happen.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DUN DUN DAAAAAAA!
> 
> Sorry for the lack of Jesse this chapter. A shimada brothers moment was needed. Oh poor Hanzo is so conflicted over everything. At;east his cowboy is back, Right? Right? Don't worry there will be a lot of Jesse next chapter.
> 
> Oh and some people mentioned being curious over the note Hanzo left Jesse in the last chapter. All I can say is you will all learn what he wrote but I can't tell you what or when it will happen. *cackles*
> 
> See you guys next chapter. Thank you for all the kudos and comments. It really keeps keep me motivated to write more and more of this.


	3. Unprepared Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse McCree has shown back up in Hanzo's life and he's a member of Overwatch. With his cover blown he struggles to deal with the possibility Jesse may no longer remember him fondly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was gonna wait till tomorrow but I figured what the hell? Chapter 3 is going up. 
> 
> I won't be updating again until Sunday though. I want to finish up Chapter 4 and get into chapter 5 before then. Hopefully I can keep up the pace. I initially set the Sunday update as a goal so I wouldn't slack but this story is just flowing from me.
> 
> Enjoy!

Several things happened far too quickly. Before he could say anything more the main doors opened and Winston came out with Lena and Genji in tow. They ran to Jesse, grabbing at him and speaking warmly in greetings. Hanzo could only stare, still in shock. He didn't even realize Genji was talking to him till he felt a hand on his shoulder. “Hanzo, are you alright?”

 

He blinked, looking at Genji then heard another voice that sent a shudder through him.

 

“Hanzo? As in your brother Hanzo?” Jesse was looking at them confused.

 

“Ah, yes, I'm sorry. Jesse this is my brother Hanzo. Hanzo, this is Jesse McCree. I worked with him back when I first joined Overwatch, or I suppose more specifically Blackwatch.”

 

Hanzo's gaze went to Jesse, trying to process all this. Jesse was part of Overwatch. Jesse knew Genji. Jesse had worked with Genji when he first arrived. Jesse _knew_. “I see.” He spoke roughly, averting his gaze. A panic was building in him. The one memory he'd held onto was that night. It had been foolish and frivolous but it had meant more than he was willing to admit. For once no one looked at him because he was a Shimada or a brother murderer. No, Jesse had looked at him warmly because of himself and they'd shared a moment that had stayed with him for four years. Now all of that was going to be ruined because he would have to remember Jesse looking at him now that he knew who he was and what he did. He didn't want that new expression to overwrite the one he remembered.

 

“Well, ain't that a kick in the teeth.” The cowboy muttered, still staring at Hanzo who refused to look back.

 

Winston urged them all to hurry in and they proceeded into the base, Hanzo bringing up the rear, taking the chance to stare at Jesse's back. No, no this was McCree, an agent of Overwatch. He needed to remember that.

 

The other old members were happy to see the cowboy, each offering a warm welcome, so very different from when he arrived. He hung on the outskirts once more, reminding himself that he was not a part of this. Whatever happy reunion he might have had with the man was almost laughably impossible. He caught McCree glancing at him from time to time and he quickly looked away, finding a moment to slip away.

 

His chest hurt, a tension rising up into his throat and he swallowed hard. Even his comforting memories were not free from his past mistakes. The worst part was when he saw Jesse all of it came rushing back and he wanted nothing more than to close the distance between them and pretend he had not left that morning.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

He did not go to the roof of the training room, instead finding a small alcove near some equipment crates near the carrier jet. At first he'd been shamefully wallowing but now he'd grown numb from worry, instead bracing himself for the inevitable and accepting his fate.

 

“You are not an easy fella to find, you know that?” The voice was amused though perhaps a little accusing, and it made Hanzo jump in surprise as he turned to meet the man's amber brown eyes.

 

“The point was to not be found. It would be pointless if it were easy.” He smiled very faintly, feeling that tension in him suddenly leave.

 

“Suppose that's true. A bit cold to just leave in the middle of my welcome back celebration though.” McCree walked over, taking out a cigar and lighting it. “So....Shima, huh?”

 

He huffed and sighed, leaning back against the crates. “My apologies. I was so used to assassin's seeking me out I couldn't give my real name.”

 

“Fair enough, still wish I had realized you were Genji's brother.” He blew out a puff of smoke and took a seat next to him as if it were the most natural thing. “There's a code here about not bedding your friend's siblings.”

 

“Is there?” He raised a brow.

 

“Well, I mean there's no rule book but it's polite to ask permission first.” Laughing he leaned back as well. “Still, it's crazy that the whole time it was you. When you up and left I didn't expect to ever see you again.”

 

“Likewise.” Hanzo murmured, glancing over. “I am sorry I did not disclose my real name. You...actually told me yours.”

 

“Probably wasn't wise. I got a bounty on my head about as big as yours, I imagine. Though if I was going down it wouldn't have been a bad way to go.” Jesse grinned widely, nudging him. His gaze still held such warmth. It shouldn't have. Now knowing who Hanzo was he should have looked disgusted.

 

A silence hung in the air between them. Hanzo had a million questions, most revolving around if Jesse knew what he'd done to Genji. What he thought of it. He couldn't ask though so he remained silent.

 

“I like the new look. It suits you.”

 

“Hm?” Looking up Hanzo stared at the man as he tapped at his nose and hair.

 

“Your new edgy look. I like it.” That smile was almost criminal. Somehow Jesse still looked at him like he had that night.

 

Swallowing hard again he reached up to fiddle with the bridge piercing, smiling faintly. “I decided I needed a change.” He glanced over again, finding Jesse too close and not close enough. He reminded himself he should not hope. It had been four years and that night had been strange in itself. A dream soaked in their own exhaustion over life and alcohol. A vulnerable moment they allowed. It would not happen again. “I see you still look like you walked out of a western.”

 

“Ha!” Jesse laughed deeply, blowing out another cloud of smoke. “Well, I seem to recall it got your attention before. 'Sides, it suits me.”

 

“It does.” Hanzo agreed, closing his eyes as he smiled, falling into some strange trance. It was so reminiscent of that night when Jesse had completely disarmed him, making him forget the tensions of the world around him.

 

They sat in silence once more, as if they didn't want to break the strange peace that had settled over them. However Jesse broke it first. “You know, always kinda wondered what the man who tried to kill his brother would look like.”

 

Hanzo tensed, the calmness immediately washed away replaced with fear and uneasiness.

 

“Also kinda wondered how the guy I met that night was doing.” brown eyes turned to Hanzo, staring at him with something he could not name. “Guess I got my answer to both.”

 

He wasn't sure how to take that and he looked away again, brow furrowing. “I suppose you are disappointed to find it is me. I imagine you heard the worst about me.”

 

“Oh yeah, but mostly from Genji. Man he was madder than a jostled hornets' nest. Real prickly. Sometimes I couldn't get around him when he got real bad.”

 

Hearing this both made Hanzo curious and also dread hearing it.

 

“Said when he could he planned on tracking you down. Didn't elaborate on what he planned but seeing as you're here I assume it didn't go down like I thought it would.” He stubbed out the cigar and looked at Hanzo. “Seems he's found some peace in his life. Said he even went and forgave you.”

 

“Yes.” he answered quickly, looking away once more, unable to meet those eyes. He wasn't sure how to take this. Jesse had seemed so familiar moments ago and then he brought this up. Was he...regretting everything now? Perhaps he should be grateful. It would make it easier to squash these feelings. He had no business expecting anything from him.

 

“That's good. Cause I don't much like the idea of pretending to hate you if he was still mad.” Jesse smiled again, slipping off his hat to run his fingers through his hair. “You know, I'm real glad I got to see you again. Thought about you from time to time while I traveled.”

 

“You did?” He chastised himself the moment he asked, sounding far too happy to hear that.

 

“Yeah. I mean kinda hard to forget something like that. Probably one of the best nights I'd had in a real long while.” There was something of a sheepish smile on the man's lips as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Which kinda brings up the question...”

 

“Question?” He knew what the man was implying but he played dumb, his heart and mind at odds.

 

“Yeah. I mean, what happens now?” Jesse leaned over. “I know what happened was supposed to just be a one time thing. No strings attached and all but, well, now we're both here.” For the first time since they started talking Jesse seemed unsure, clenching at his hat on his lap.

 

“Ah.” Hanzo tried to sound natural, struggling with what he wanted and what he knew must happen. “I think it would be in our best interest to carry on in a professional manner. We are here to serve Overwatch, are we not?”

 

The disappointment was obvious on Jesse's face but he nodded, pursing his lips tightly. “Right. Makes sense. Just...put it behind us, huh?”

 

“I think it would be best.” He agreed, telling himself this was the correct course. He could not expect anything more. They would keep that night as a good memory and carry on as colleagues, possibly friends.

 

“I gotcha.” Sighing heavily, Jesse stood, slipping his hat back on. “Well, guess I should go and find my old room and see if the beds are as uncomfortable as I remember.”

 

“I assure you, they are still quite uncomfortable.” Hanzo grinned, looking up at him.

 

There was that smile again, warm and inviting, urging him to ignore the logic in his head. “Some things never change then.” He went to take a step then paused. “Don't be a stranger now.”

 

Hanzo felt as if that phrase held more than he wanted to delve into, than maybe even Jesse wanted to say. “I won't.”

 

Seemingly content with that response the cowboy nodded and left the hanger, leaving Hanzo alone with his messy thoughts once more.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Jesse did not go to his room first, needing to just take a walk to try and get his head on straight. He'd played things cool but he'd honestly been shaken by it all. Seeing Shi...no Hanzo again. Hanzo was Genji's brother, the brother he'd only heard harsh things about. That had probably been the hardest thing to try and connect. He knew of the older Shimada by reputation and Genji's short comments. None of it sounded good.

 

However he'd also met a man who looked about as lost and tired as he felt that night four years ago. A man he'd been drawn to almost instantly, that made him feel calm and relaxed. So when he realized that Hanzo was _the_ Hanzo Shimada he couldn't dislike him or even feel any form of revulsion. If he was being totally honest he felt a big guilty until Genji informed him that he'd forgiven his brother.

 

Lighting another cigar he chewed at it in agitation as he puffed in the smoke, wishing it would calm him. When he'd told Hanzo he thought about him from time to time he'd greatly underestimated it. He'd thought about that mysterious, beautiful man more times than he felt comfortable saying. He never had been able to get him out of his head. He reached up to tug his hat down more, sighing. Dammit.

 

This was the mess. It was lucky the others interrupted the reunion when they did because he was about five seconds from going over to Hanzo and kissing him. God he wanted to. It surprised him how much. It was so bad he'd made excuses to break up all the greetings so he could get situated and went hunting for Hanzo straight away. He wanted to ask him a million things. Why had he left without waking him? No, he knew. It was smart and if he had as much control he might have done the same. The talk they'd just had reaffirmed that. What happened that night was supposed to be a one time thing, nothing more. He'd just read too much into it. Hell, maybe his memory was warped from his own deeper desires.

 

Jesse sighed once more with a bit more force so a faint growl rumbled from his throat. That entire talk could have gone better. He shouldn't have brought up Genji. He saw how Hanzo's expression shifted the second he brought it up. He hadn't meant to make him feel uneasy. He simply wanted to let the other know he wasn't holding anything against him. “Dammit.” He kicked at a waste bin in the hall before jumping at a beeping overhead.

 

“Agent McCree, please refrain from damaging anything. The base is still in disrepair.” Athena's voice actually sounded stern.

 

Jesse sighed and tipped his hat. “Apologies, Athena. Won't happen again.” Now he was getting reprimanded by the damned AI. He really was a mess. Turning he started for where his old room was, telling himself he had to get himself straightened out. He and Hanzo weren't gonna have some mushy reunion and things weren't gonna be like he might have let himself imagine from time to time. They were gonna get along as fellow agents and that was all there was to it. He could do that. They'd just spent one night together after all, right? Just....just one silly night.

 

He quickly extinguished the cigar on the wall, scrapping the ash from it before he got yelled at again. He'd come back to try and make right what was wrong. He might not be to blame for what happened at the Swiss base but he hadn't done anything to stop it either. The idea of returning to Overwatch had been a hard decision, a part of him wanting to just keep out of it before he made a bigger mess of things. He was glad he chose to come though. Even if things weren't going to go like he hoped he realized he'd really liked seeing Hanzo again. There'd just been something comforting in seeing and speaking with him again. It was easy, familiar.

 

Stuffing a stray and dangerous thought to the back of his mind he found his room and got to settling in.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you guys honestly think Jesse was gonna hate him? No no I have so much more planned for them.
> 
> Jesse's POV will become more common as the story goes because I love my sweet cowboy and have to write about the pain in his heart.
> 
> Also I take Jesse as being of half Hispanic decent if anyone is curious.


	4. I've got your back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse still isn't sure how things will play out but he knows he won't get anywhere unless he can get Hanzo to actually be around him. Taking matters into his own hands he tries to get over the hurdles Hanzo set up between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SUNDAY UPDATE!
> 
> I'm back with the planned chapter for today and we now have 150% more Jesse.
> 
> Yes, we'll be flopping between the pair as they try and get through this. This is also a more mellow chapter to prepare you guys for a rollercoaster of action and drama that will be in the following chapter I am currently working on. Hope your hearts are ready cause this story is planned to have many chapters.
> 
> Once again thank you all for the comments and kudos. I am so glad you are all enjoying this and I hope to continue to make this story enjoyable.

 

 

Despite Hanzo saying he wouldn't be a stranger Jesse didn't see the man for two whole days. By the second day he started asking around to try and find him but he had to cease after Genji questioned why he wanted to find his brother so bad. Not that Jesse thought Genji would get mad at him, but he did not want to go around disclosing his and Hanzo's relationship, well, complicated relationship. He knew things had to be professional but that didn't mean he couldn't try and get closer to the man in a friendly manner.

 

Frustrated he finally asked Athena, praying Hanzo hadn't told her to hide his whereabouts.

 

“Agent Hanzo is in the training room running simulations. Shall I inform him you wish to speak to him?”

 

“No, that's fine.” So that's where he was now. Jesse swore he'd checked there recently and started to wonder if Hanzo was avoiding him or it was just bad timing. Putting out his cigar he hurried to the training room, hearing the sound of training bots hitting the ground. He took great care as he peeked in, seeing the man's back as he landed from a back flip and let an arrow fly. He hadn't actually seen Hanzo shoot a bow but had heard it was impressive. Since he hadn't been noticed he took the opportunity to spectate for the moment, just admiring the man.

 

While he was still disappointed Hanzo had put an immediate stop to a possibility of a repeat of that night, he was sure the man had his reasons. It was possible that it hadn't been that big a deal to the other man though that raised a few questions he felt would just muddy the waters further if he asked.

 

When Hanzo finished another simulation he decided he would make himself known, clapping faintly as he let out a whistle. “Damn, Darlin', you really are a deadly shot. Might even give me a run for my money.”

 

Hanzo turned slowly, staring at him with a strange look before he smiled a bit smugly. “I have heard you are a formidable opponent as well.” Tilting his head he stared back at Jesse as if considering something. “Perhaps we can see who is the more skilled between us.”

 

“Oh I don't know if you wanna do that. Might make you regret it.” He winked, smiling wickedly at the challenge. The idea of actually dueling him was interesting, sparking a bit of a competitive flare in him.

 

Hanzo seemed to respond to that, his expression taking on a stern but confident look as he faced Jesse. “Big words but if there's one thing I know about you is you can talk big. Can you back it up with actions?”

 

“Heh.” He reached for Peacekeeper, always keeping her on his hip. “Athena, run simulation 48.” He walked over to Hanzo, standing beside him. “First to thirty?”

 

“Fifty.” Hanzo corrected, readying his bow as he watched the training bots assemble.

 

“Fifty it is.” Jesse smiled, facing forward and awaiting Athena to announce the start of the simulation. “May the best man win.”

 

“Hm, then you should simply congratulate me now.” Hanzo said smugly, grinning widely just as Athena announced the start.

 

Jesse was a bit distracted right at the start, seeing a spark of life in Hanzo that had been missing from him since they'd met again. He ended up starting late, telling himself he had a reason to try hard, wanting Hanzo to acknowledge him.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Sitting back against the far wall they stared out at the decimated bots that were slowly reassembling, passing back Hanzo's gourd between them. “Damn, you got lucky on that last shot.” He muttered, handing the gourd back.

 

“I do not rely on luck. You simply were not fast enough.” Hanzo's lips turned up in a faint smile as he took a drink.

 

“Well I also don't scale buildings and do fancy flip shots either but I make do.” Jesse laughed, taking another drink. “You know this sake ain't half bad. Usually like a little more bite to my liquor though.”

 

“Oh I remember. I do not miss that.” There was that faint smile again. It was relaxed and welcoming. Jesse had been a bit smitten that night four years ago if he was being honest. At first things were tense but within a few moments they seemed to rest into an easy rhythm and he was glad that hadn't changed despite the years. So many things could have gone wrong meeting up again like this but somehow they just fell into place. A bit like pieces of a very complicated puzzle. He cringed a little at the overly sappy thought, glancing at Hanzo once more. “You make a habit of avoiding everyone or just me?”

 

Hanzo almost choked on the drink he was taking, looking at Jesse with a slightly wet shimmer of alcohol on his lips that threatened to undo him. “I was not-” He seemed catch the slightly accusing look Jesse was giving him and rethought his words, “I was not sure how to go about just...being around each other. And I do avoid the others.” He muttered the last sentence softly, staring down at his lap.

 

Watching the way Hanzo's expression shifted again Jesse sighed. “No one really thinks you're like the devil, Hanzo. You gotta know that.”

 

“Why don't you think that?” Hanzo's question gave Jesse pause. The archer looked at him almost nervously.

 

Swallowing hard he tried to think of anything to say that would sound platonic enough. “I just...can't think bad of you.”

 

That comment did not seem to be sufficient enough and Hanzo sighed as he looked away.

 

Slipping off his hat he scratched his head and raked his fingers through his hair frustrated. “How can I think bad about the guy I've thought about since the night I met him?” He finally said. “I can't, Hanzo. Even knowing what happened I can't think of you like some faceless monster like I did back when me and Genji worked together. It's easy for people to just pass judgment on others when they don't know the whole story and I reckon you got plenty of reasons on your end for how things went down. I'm not saying it's right what you did, but I think you know that.” It made sense now. Hanzo that night had seemed to be struggling with some mighty heavy demons and now he realized it was the crippling regret of how things went down with Genji.

 

Jesse dared a look, seeing Hanzo looking at him so...lost. It was such an unguarded expression he wondered if he should even be allowed to see it. “I ain't in any position to judge you, Hanzo. Not sure how much you know but I wasn't always the upstanding member of Overwatch, in fact I was never actually Overwatch.” Sighing he tried to figure out where to even start. “See I was a little punk in a gang that dealt in robberies and arms deals. I killed and hurt innocent people and I didn't think a thing about it. I was selfish and careless and the only reason I got a second chance was cause I could shoot better than anyone. Gabriel Reyes was head of the black ops unit known as Blackwatch. I'm sure Genji told you about 'em. He gave me a choice, join or rot in jail and selfish me was only looking after my own skin when I signed those papers.” He still remembered that day, balancing on a knife as those sharp eyes stared him down awaiting his answer. “Well we did things the UN and even Morrison probably would have frowned at. I told myself I was doing things for the greater good but even then I started questioning things. Before the fallout I ran, not doing a damn thing but running from one bad deal to the next.” It still stung. If he'd told Gabe to rethink things. If he'd warned Gabe more or voiced his doubts over that damn doctor then maybe things might have changed. Hell, he should have trusted Jack but he kept his mouth shut because he worried Gabe would look at him with disappointment.

 

There was a faint touch to his arm and he looked down, seeing Hanzo's hand on him and the man staring at him with understanding when he looked up to meet his eyes. It brought the smallest of smiles to Jesse's lips, that comforting feeling right there again. “Look, what I'm trying to say is that maybe the others might, and I say might, have something against you, and you probably might still have assassins and your family at your heels but one thing you don't gotta worry about is me. I have your back, alright?”

 

He could have been imagining it but Jesse swore he saw just the tiniest bit of color to Hanzo's face as those brown eyes looked away once more. “You do not need to-”

 

“I mean it.” Before he could stop himself Jesse took Hanzo's hand, squeezing it. “I'm on your side, no matter what.”

 

When those pretty dark eyes looked at Jesse once more there was a hurricane of various emotions swirling behind them. Hanzo looked back at him as if he wanted to do much more than stare. A very audible gulp sounded from the archer's mouth before he squeezed Jesse's hand back. “Thank you. I...I also have your back.”

 

Smiling it took everything in Jesse to not lean in to kiss him. He thought maybe he could with how Hanzo looked at him but he also feared ruining this moment. Hanzo trusted him and he told himself to be content with that.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Their talk must have helped because Hanzo stopped avoiding him and Jesse was grateful. When they ate it was together and the conversation was easy. They'd also taken to practicing together, still trying to one up one another and sometimes Jesse won and sometimes he lost. Unfortunately it had not escaped the notice of the others and as he and Genji were helping Lena fix up the carrier jet, mostly the heavy lifting, he got the third degree.

 

“You and my brother have been very friendly lately.” The comment wasn't exactly accusing but it wasn't entirely friendly either.

 

“Yeah, you could say that.” He tried to focus very hard on handing a wrench to Lena who was crawled up into a space far to small for him to consider fitting into.

 

“Jesse.”

 

“What?” He looked over, seeing Genji's visor covered face staring at him. For someone who didn't show his face much he somehow embodied the look of 'talk or I will make you' really well. “Tch, okay fine...we may have run into each other on the road once a few years back.”

 

“Really?” That seemed to throw Genji off and Jesse vaguely wondered if the damn ninja thought he'd made some haphazard move on his brother for some dubious reason.

 

“Yeah, just kinda ran into each other, shared some drinks. I didn't know who he was. Gave a fake name. That's kinda why we were a bit awkward at first. Surprised at the coincidence.” That was all true despite leaving out some very big details. Genji didn't need to know that.

 

“I see. Then I suppose your sudden friendship makes sense. My apologies, I just...I do not want to chase him off.”

 

Stopping he turned to Genji with a frown. “You think I mean to run him off?”

 

“I did not say that, but I am aware I did not paint the best picture of him back in Blackwatch and you always seemed to be mad on my account. I just was worried is all.” Now Genji seemed apprehensive. “I apologize. To assume you mean ill towards him was an unkind judgment.”

 

Geez. He wished he could crawl in a hole. While he might have felt offended if things were exactly as he said he only felt a bit guilty. He'd slept with Genji's brother and was harboring a mighty big crush on said brother. Granted he wasn't gonna act on it. He and Hanzo had agreed to that so there shouldn't be a problem. “It's fine, Genji. You don't gotta get all serious. Your brother is...a pretty okay guy.” Did that even sound natural?

 

“I am glad you think so.” There was a smile in that voice. “I suppose it is no surprise you both get along. I feel perhaps you might understand him better than the others given your past.”

 

“Don't worry. Your brother don't got an enemy with me. Though, I didn't ask, how are you two gettin' along?” Hanzo never seemed in the mood to discuss that and given how the few times he brought Genji up made the older Shimada tense he decided to not ask unless Hanzo brought it up himself.

 

Genji didn't seem too keen on it either as he failed to answer for several moments. “It is a long road. There is much we must mend. Not simply that night but also the years leading up to it.” They heard Lena call down for something and passed it up to her. “Hanzo was always the responsible one. He was the only one who needed to. No one put any expectations on me. I was the spare and Hanzo the heir. I was not needed unless Hanzo was no longer an option and my brother succeeded easily in anything the clan asked of him.”

 

Frowning Jesse tried to imagine it. A life like that. “Things don't just come easily to people like that. I’ve seen your brother practicing. Man's got discipline.”

 

“I know that. At the time I believed everything came easily to Hanzo, now I see I was mistaken. While I was rebelling out of a want for acknowledgment and attention Hanzo was being crushed under the family's expectations. My carelessness placed a greater burden on him.” Another pause and when Genji spoke again it was soft. “I fear he still resents me.”

 

“And if he does? You gonna just let it go? That ain't gonna fix nothing, Genji.” Sighing he leaned against the jet's tire. “Look if you want my honest opinion, you two need to have a good solid heart to heart. Just tell him how you felt and apologize for what you did and let him do the same. You both wrapped in guilt is just gonna fester and if you let it keep going it'll explode and there will be another fight.”

 

A cybernetic sigh left Genji and he nodded. “You are right. You sound like Master.”

 

“Yeah? Well then if you ain't gonna listen to me you should to him. That monk is a fountain of wisdom.”

 

Laughing the ninja nodded. “He is. I have much to thank him for. However it seems I still have much to learn.”

 

“Don't we all?” He said it as a playful joke but realized how true it was. He still couldn't entirely learn from his mistakes and while he'd taken steps to atone he wasn't there yet.

 

“Thank you, Jesse.” Placing a hand on the cowboy, Genji squeezed his shoulder.

 

“No need for thanks.” He really didn't think he deserved it much, from Genji or Hanzo. He was a jaded man struggling to make right what he'd done wrong and even helping Genji came with a layer of ulterior motives. He wanted the brothers to get along, he wanted Hanzo to stop looking so haunted, and he wanted a chance to make the older Shimada rethink his thoughts about their relationship.

 

If anything Jesse McCree was not a man deserving of thanks.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Jesse. My poor sweet cowboy.


	5. A Steady Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things begin to settle between Hanzo and Jesse but there still seems to be a thin veil between them. Regardless the work of Overwatch continues as the group fills out with more members and they are given their first mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Awww yeah surprise update! HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
> 
> I'm taking full advantage of this three day weekend to really get this going. Hopefully work won't be too crazy and I can keep up this pace and get a chapter up every other day at least. I'm super excited for the next chapter as I've been imaging it for a long while. 
> 
> Enjoy everyone and as always thank you for the comments and Kudos. I've been beaming all week reading them and seeing how you are all enjoying this so far. <3

Fortunately Jesse McCree was not the last member to respond to the recall. A few weeks later presented not one but four in total, though two were new members. Reinhardt had returned with his squire Brigitte in tow and a few days later Torbjorn arrived with a Bastion unit he swore up and down was harmless. Despite the slow pace they were coming together and Jesse felt a little semblance of something like a home. It was familiar and calming even if it seemed to drag up some of the worst memories at times. Those were rough nights that found him sleepless so he'd wandering around the base silently, sneaking outside for a smoke.

 

He'd been smoking and watching the stars, thinking it was a nice clear night to stargaze if nothing else, when he heard a voice overhead.

 

“Why are you awake?”

 

Jesse jumped and dropped the cigar, and fumbled to snatch it back up before glancing above him. Hanzo was peaking out from the catwalk above. He smiled. “I could ask you the same question, Darlin'.”

 

Hanzo huffed. “I could not sleep.”

 

“Well, that makes two of us. You got room up there for one more?” He was hopeful, thinking the ladder to get up there was close. Ain't no way he was gonna shimmy up there like Hanzo could.

 

“I suppose there is.” There was the smile Jesse had gotten used to. Hanzo never smiled very big. It was always small, just a subtle upturn of his lips as his face relaxed. It was different from the self assured smiles he'd put on when his skills were called into question. Almost like that smile was one he'd practiced back when he was the heir to the Shimada empire.

 

Jesse bit down on the cigar to hold it in place as he found the ladder and climbed up slowly. Walking to where Hanzo sat he noticed a blanket wrapped around the smaller man and immediately thought it was pretty damn cute. He wasn't gonna say that out loud though and bit back the temptation as he sat down next to Hanzo and stared up at the clear sky. “Pretty night.”

 

“Yes, it has been rare there is a cloudless sky as of late.” Hanzo agreed. “Though it has gotten quite cold at night.”

 

“Well it is October. Gonna start getting mighty cold up here in the base.” He remembered when he'd sometimes be stationed here for a mission or two. The sky still looked the same, a constant. “Did it get cold in Hanamura?”

 

“At times. We would get snow from time to time. I remember the first time I saw it.” Hanzo's voice was soft, contemplative. “I was four. Genji was still too small, but I remembered vaguely touching it and being surprised by the cold. I wanted to show Genji so I gathered it in my hands and ran to my mother who was holding him. He cried when he touched it.” Hanzo laughed, a sad smile on his face. “I never liked it when he cried. As the older brother I always felt it was also my duty to protect him. Another thing I failed at.”

 

The shift in topic alarmed Jesse because no doubt Hanzo was awake because of this very thing. “It never snowed where I was, well, no that ain't true. It did once.” He sat back on his hands, looking at the sky. “I was with deadlock and everyone was celebrating a job. I wasn't feeling all that social so I went up on top of the saloon and then this cold fluffy stuff started falling from the sky. It was a cold year, more than usual but until then I had never seen snow. I remember thinking the stars were falling down for some reason.”

 

Hanzo chuckle beside him.

 

“Always thought it was pretty though. Should actually snow here in the next month or so. Maybe we can have an epic snowball fight and see who the better shot really is?” Jesse looked over, brow raised challengingly.

 

“You really are competitive, aren't you?” Hanzo countered, eyebrow also raised.

 

“Pot calling the kettle black, Darlin'.”

 

“Hm, I suppose so.” The archer smirked. Their attention went back to the sky and Jesse noticed that the tension in Hanzo's body was lessened as well as his own anxiety. It wasn't normal to feel so comfortable around another like this, was it? He felt like he could be content just sitting here talking with Hanzo about everything.

 

Jesse wasn't sure how much time had passed but he eventually felt a weight against his side and glanced over to see Hanzo leaning on him, that dark head of hair tilted toward him though not enough to rest on his shoulder. It was so tempting to leave him like that, basking in the closeness he knew he shouldn't be asking for. He did let a little more time go by, watching Hanzo's sleeping face. A tiny memory bubbled up to the forefront of his mind, waking up still drunk in the middle of the night to find himself tangled up in that beautiful stranger from the bar. He remembered thinking as he fell back asleep how he couldn't wait to wake up to that face only to be disappointed when he found the bed empty and a small, carefully written note on the nightstand.

 

The twinge in his chest startled him out of it and he bit his lip, staring out at the ocean before stubbing out the cigar and nudging the smaller man. “Hanzo, you're fallin' asleep.”

 

“Hm?” Groggy and with eyes heavy-lidded, Hanzo blinked, staring around him before looking at Jesse.

 

 _It's criminal how he looks at me that way._ Jesse thought it and found himself leaning in just a little before whatever daze Hanzo had been in seemed to fall away and he sat up quickly. Dammit.

 

“My apologies.” Shifting the blanket around him, Hanzo leaned away. “You have an unusual effect on me it seems.”

 

“I do?”

 

“Yes,” Was it unfair Hanzo smiled at him that way? “Oddly enough you are quite relaxing to be around.”

 

“I'm gonna take that as a compliment.” Jesse grinned.

 

“You should.”

 

“I will then.”

 

“Good.”

 

They both sat staring down, the awkwardness now between them forming out of insecurity, at least on Jesse's part. He knew damn well he should pull away, suggest they go to bed. Why couldn't he?

 

“We should try and sleep. Winston wanted us to have a meeting tomorrow. Perhaps we will actually start doing something good for the world instead of talking about it.” Hanzo got up, reaching a hand down to Jesse to help him up.

 

“Yeah, it's about time Overwatch came out of the shadows, so to speak.” He got up, pulling his hand back to shove in his pockets. This felt wrong. It felt like they should be closer than this but there was something he couldn't quite figure out blocking them. Was it Hanzo? Was it him? Was it just not in the cards? Chalking the questions up to him just being sleepy they climbed down from the catwalk and went back inside, muttering sleepy 'good nights' as they went to bed.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

With enough members to realistically call Overwatch officially in operation they had a meeting. Winston was clearly trying to portray a very confident leadership role but the gorilla was awkward and a little all over. It was endearing in a way and even Hanzo found himself listening with great care despite the clumsiness.

 

“I've been tracking Talon's movements over the last year and it appears they are trying to eradicate stronger figureheads that are against their ideals. Of course we aren't sure what those are. There was the assassination on Mondatta, followed by an attempt on Katya Volskaya several months later. While the attempt failed the soldier known as Reaper was seen there. This man also attempted to invade this base and download all living Overwatch agents' data from Athena's servers, which ultimately pushed my decision to activate the recall.” Winston looked back at them from the screen that had displayed the information. “We also know that Akande Ogundimu, also known as Doomfist, has escaped from his cell. I'm sure I don't need to remind our former members the level of danger he presents.”

 

There seemed a tense air about the members. Hanzo did not personally know the man but his reputation was well known, especially in the underworld.

 

“Given all this information I have been keeping careful tabs on anyone who may be considered a troublemaker to Talon. Which leads me to this man.” Winston changed the image from Doomfist to a young man. He wore a warm smile, his skin dark with a tattoo on his arm and thick dreaded hair. Everything about him was welcoming and fashionable, exuding a youthful energy. “This is Lucio Correia dos Santos, an international musician. Last year the Vishkar corporation occupied Rio De Janeiro with plans to improve the lives of the locals. While much of the official story was swept under the rug my digging found that the people were given unrealistic restrictions in the name of peace and harmony. Lucio then stole a piece of Vishkar technology and lead a rebellion that forced the Vishkar corporation out which in turn rose his popularity not just locally but world wide. Since then Vishkar has struggled to maintain it's pristine image.”

 

“So you're thinking that Vishkar is contracting Talon to take the kid out cause he's a thorn in their side?” Jesse commented, putting it together.

 

“Yes, or perhaps Vishkar is working with Talon.” Hanzo spoke up. “It is not that unlikely that a large corporation would ally itself with an underground organization. The Shimada had several dealings with many businesses that maintained a friendly image but exploiting others under the surface.”

 

Winston nodded. “These are also the same conclusions I came to.” He passed out a file to each of them. “Which is why I have called you all to action. I believe there will be an attempt on his life very soon.”

 

“How soon?” Lena perked up, worry in her voice. She had been at the assassination on the omnic spiritual leader Mondatta. She'd witnessed Talon's cruelty first hand.

 

Adjusting his glasses Winston cleared his throat. “In three days.”

 

“That's a might short notice to be telling us this, Winston.” Torbjorn huffed. “Doesn't give us much time to be sitting on our hands talking about what Talon may or may not do.”

 

“I agree. We should be hurrying to save this man as soon as possible.” Reinhardt's voice echoed in the small meeting room.

 

“My apologies. I needed to be sure I had everything in order. I also have a plan.” He changed the image on the screen once more. A youthful girl stood leaning on a Meka. “This is Hana “D.Va” Song. A month ago she picked up on our recall signal by accident and contacted me. Miss Song is a former professional Starcraft player who went to work for the South Korean government as a Meka pilot. Her accolades are many.”

 

“You are in contact with THE D.Va, Winston?” Reinhardt immediately perked up, the obvious starstruck look on his face.

 

“Yes, but the important thing is she is willing to help us. She wishes to join our cause. Apparently there has been many questionable things happening in the government but any attempts she makes to get answers seem to be overlooked. She feels something is wrong and that she will need to take things into her own hands. This all works in our favor, not only to have an in to the South Korean Government in case Talon has also reached there but because Lucio is scheduled to have a concert in Busan, South Korea.”

 

Everything seemed to click amongst them.

 

“Using her connections, Miss Song has secured us several tickets to the concert where we will mix in with the other concert goers and stop any attempt on Lucio Correia dos Santos' life. If possible I would like to recruit him. His ability to rally others would be beneficial to Overwatch and we can also protect him from further attempts on his life.” Feeling more confident as he saw everyone reach understanding he sat up a bit straighter.

 

Hanzo had to admit it was smart. Uniting those that Talon sought to destroy against them. However Overwatch was still considered illegal in it's actions and if they were not careful their tiny personal rebellion could be squashed before it began.

 

“Now I would like for McCree, Reinhardt, Genji and Zenyatta to filter into the backstage areas, keeping an eye out for any suspicious activity. If they plan to use Windowmaker as a sniper once more then we need to be sure to keep an eye on any high areas. Lena, Fareeha and Hanzo will enter the concert as fans to give us support on the ground.”

 

“What?” Hanzo tensed, wondering what had compelled the gorilla to choose him for such a thing.

 

“I would like you to infiltrate the concert with Lena and Fareeha. Your, ahem, appearance will blend in with the crowd.” Winston seemed a bit sheepish as he explained.

 

Hanzo felt his face going hot and a loud suppressed laugh next to him. He glared at Jesse who was covering his mouth badly, seeing as his large grin could be seen from across the room..

 

“Wow, I never thought the day would come when my brother was considered more hip than myself.” Genji teased.

 

The desire to leap out the nearest window was almost overwhelming but he put on a practiced expression, trying to remain impassive. “If that is what's required of me.”

 

Jesse just chuckled louder next to him, which completely destroyed the calm air he was trying to display. The oddest thing was everyone else seemed to be grinning at him which was a first.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

It was a very strange experience. When the team arrived in Busan he was immediately dragged out shopping with Lena and Fareeha to find something suitable to wear. Since it was for a mission he couldn't complain entirely but he was wondering what the hell the youth of Korea were wearing these days. As he walked from the dressing room he saw Lena beaming. “Oh it looks great on you, love.” She clapped. “I think we'll blend in just right.”

 

“It is actually really flattering.” Fareeha agreed, having already found her own outfit. She was well built, with wide, strong shoulders Hanzo could appreciate. She carried herself upright with trained posture and next to both him and Lena she was almost the most imposing out of the three. He'd been sure he'd feel out of place with the two but they had all come to an agreed understanding of solidarity as they wandered the shopping district. Hanzo spoke enough Korean to be able to get them around though Lena and Fareeha seemed to be able to use basic terms. “Did you have to learn several languages due to your family?” Fareeha had asked.

 

“Yes, it was a requirement. I was to be sufficient in several languages and comfortably fluent in several more.” The lessons had been long and brutal but when he was told he was doing well by his father he would hold onto that praise. Of course he only received praise when he was fluent enough to hold a whole conversation and not a moment sooner.

 

“That seems like a lot of pressure.” Lena said, grabbing at his arm as they weaved through the crowd. It was thick with people and the smaller girl had almost been swept away many times if not for her quick and fluid darting through people. Now she just grabbed onto Hanzo or Fareeha when it got too bad.

 

“It was....difficult. As the heir much was expected on me if I was to take over. Being able to speak to current and new business associates in their native tongue was just good business. It showed diligence and respect and was as much a factor in the families image as the deals we made.” He rattled off the logic as if it were second nature, realizing that while true it was a harsh reality of his life.

 

“Still, I couldn't do that.” The small girl laughed as they passed a salon. She stopped, turning her head to stare for a moment. “Oh, I have an idea!”

 

The other two stopped to look at her, the grin on the quick girl's face giving them both pause.

 

“We should dye our hair. All the kids we've seen have it done!”

 

“No.” Fareeha and Hanzo both said in unison, another level of solidarity binding them.

 

Lena pouted. “Awww, come on. I was thinking of going pink.” She looked into the salon and saw it wasn't too busy.

 

“It would require too much time to strip the color from my hair to add another.” Fareeha admitted.

 

“Likewise. However if you wish to have your hair done we can wait with you.” Hanzo conceded. He vaguely imagined himself coming back to the others with green hair and then shuddered. Genji would never let him live it down. He'd already received many playful jabs over his role in this mission.

 

Their compliance to wait seemed to placate Lena and she dragged them into the salon. The pair sat talking with her and the woman doing her hair, Hanzo translating at times though some of Lena's terms were difficult for him to truly translate. It reminded him of Jesse and the way he spoke. Sometimes it took him a moment to understand the cowboy's idioms, not just because it required him to think outside his own way of thinking but because he found the man's voice so alluring. Jesse had a honeyed tone when he spoke, warm and sweet, with the lower timbers of his voice causing him to shiver just a little at times.

 

Memories of that sweet voice whispering in his ear, the hot breath making his already alcohol addled mind melt. The subtle vibrations of his lips at Hanzo's ear, tickling and teasing. Just his voice was enough to send Hanzo's thoughts spiraling into dangerous territory. He was glad the girls seemed too busy discussing Lena's hair as they walked back to notice he'd been spacing out. It did not bode well that he still thought these things. He and Jesse were nothing more than coworkers now, though they had seemed to fall into a steady and comfortable friendship.

 

Yes, a friendship was what they had. There was no point to wanting more. He was already pushing what he deserved by allowing himself to enjoy the man's company as much as he did.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MISSION TIME! I'm sure you are all seeing how this is not just entirely about Jesse and Hanzo dancing around each other but Hanzo and Genji coming together as Brothers while the newely recalled Overwatch forms around them.
> 
> Also LUCIO AND D.VA ARE JOINING THE STORY! I'm so excited for this. I haven't had much chance to write for Hana and I've been dying to try and get a grip on her character.
> 
> See you all next chapter.


	6. Save the Music

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The recalled Overwatch has it's first official mission. Saving Lucio Correia dos Santos is now priority one as they discover Talon plans to assassinate him. Of course despite all their planning there are just some things you can't plan for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took longer than I thought. However this is an extra long chapter because I just had to get ALLLLLL of this in. Also tags have been updated for obvious reasons. I've been dying to write this entire section ever since I thought of this story so I really hope you all enjoy it.
> 
> Thank you again for following this story thus far. There is much more to come so don't think it's even close to ending.

They were stationed in a small safe house of sorts. It was a place Hana Song had rented for them under an alias. They'd only need it for the day as they prepared for the mission since they planned to leave Korea tonight with Lucio hopefully in tow.

 

The concert group got ready to go, hoping they could easily integrate into the crowd and not draw attention. Hanzo had vaguely heard Winston arguing with Jesse over his choice to wear his hat as he left the room he changed in.

 

“I just feel it will draw too much attention.” Winston said almost a bit helplessly.

 

“I ain't even gonna be seen by no one.” The cowboy argued.

 

“Still-”

 

“Given the eclectic nature of our agents I feel as though Agent McCree's hat is the least of our troubles.” Zenyatta's mellow tone rang out between them.

 

“I knew I liked ya, Zen.” Jesse laughed. “See, stop worrying so much.” A loud clap on Winston's shoulder followed the comments and the gorilla seemed to give in.

 

Hanzo entered the room at that moment, seeing the group all sprawled out going over any last minutes details. “How soon till we must leave for the concert?” he asked Winston, glancing at Jesse and finding the cowboy staring at him too obviously. There was a sudden surge of insecurity he couldn't seem to contain and he frowned, he thought he was frowning at least, as he turned his attention to the man. “Is something wrong?”

 

Realizing Hanzo was speaking to him Jesse finally blinked and shook his head a little. “Naw just...wow.”

 

“Looks good, right?” Lena popped up behind him, making an attempt to loop an arm around Hanzo's shoulders, beaming with pride. Her hair was a vibrant pink and styled up with more volume than before. She'd talked about wanting to cut it but didn't want to go too overboard. Her outfit was something he could only think of as 'British Punk' and she wore it as if she had her whole life. adversly she and Fareeha had picked out something more sleek for him. He wore a black designer shirt with an elegant abstract design on the front that snaked around the side. The long sleeves were made of shear black see-through fabric so his tattoo could be made out underneath and he's pushed the sleeves up his forearms slightly. The jeans Fareeha had picked out were fitted and dark as well and he had to admit he had thought they were quite flattering when trying them on. To top it all off they'd picked out some jewelry for him to wear, a simple small beaded necklace that matched his piercings.

 

“Looks damn good.” Jesse agreed, slipping off his hat as if to pay respects and Hanzo's entire demeanor lost composure as he turned away shyly. _Hold it together._

 

“Alright, stop ogling him. We have a job to do.” Fareeha to the rescue. She nudged Jesse's shoulder playfully. Her outfit consisted of a capped sleeve v-neck shirt with a black designer vest allowing for her muscular arms to be on display. Something both Lena and Hanzo agreed was a must despite the girl's annoyed blushing. She had also gone with some dark grey slacks that rose up above her ankles a little more to show off her stylish dress shoes. She had a very cool look about her if Hanzo was being honest.

 

“Well don't you all just look finer than a warm summer's day.” The cowboy said as he took another look at them.

 

“Charmer.” Lena giggled but cast a look at Hanzo that told him she was on to him and he quickly tried to look anywhere but at her or Jesse. This mission could not end fast enough.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Each one of them were fitted with an almost invisible ear piece so they could communicate to one another. As they entered the concert hall Hanzo affirmed their arrival. “We're in. Once the concert starts we will fan out to cover more ground.”

 

“Read ya loud and clear, Darlin'. I got me a nice perch up high in the rafters with a clear view of the stage.” Jesse's voice rang over the comm.

 

“Reinhardt here. I have found a suitable position near security.” Given his size it made sense for the man to be there, with any luck being confused for a member of security. It also allowed an eye on the surveillance room in case of tampering.

 

“I have found a suitable position along the west stairwell. The vibration of sounds is quite pleasant.” With Zenyatta's unique synthetic senses he was able to catch any noise of someone using the stairwell to reach the upper areas. They were all prepared for a sniper, finding it to be the most effective method for Talon to use.

 

They still had no idea how Winston had stumbled onto the lead that Talon would make a try for Lucio's life but Hanzo decided to pin it on Athena's AI capabilities.

 

“I am near the east side of the stage. Hanzo your bow is hidden along the opposite side should you require it.” Genji was the next to respond. It had been agreed that since Hanzo could not bring a weapon into the concert that Genji would secure it in an easily accessible location.

 

“Alright luvs, Operation Save the Music is a go.” Lena smiled as she whispered into the comm, glancing at Hanzo and Fareeha.

 

“Is that what we are calling it?” Hanzo questioned, amused.

 

“I feel it is a lovely and appropriate title.” Zenyatta agreed.

 

“Pretty standard though.” Jesse chuckled.

 

“Please clear the comms, everyone.” Winston's voice called to them. He was stationed outside with a car so they could easily get away with Lucio. Clumsy he may be but he did keep everyone on task.

 

Moving with the crowd Hanzo, Lena and Fareeha waited for the concert to start. Out of habit Hanzo surveyed the area, glancing up into the scaffolding that held the lights for any sign of oddities. While the assassination during a concert was a risky move given the amount of witnesses it also made protecting the target difficult with the crowd. He was still looking up, thinking he may have saw something when the lights dimmed and a voice called from the stage. Amidst a sea of fog and sparkling lights a man emerged, calling out to the crowd.

 

“Hey hey, are you all ready to jam?” Lucio called out, the crowd screaming and calling out in response.

 

It was loud and the flashing lights made it difficult for Hanzo to make out anything but shadows. He looked around the stage, not able to tell the techs and stage hands from an assassin. Lena touched his arm and signaled that she was moving toward the stage. He nodded then looked at Fareeha, gesturing to the side his bow was on, wanting it to be close in case of danger.

 

The music began to play, a high energy beat that seemed to rev up the crowd. Hanzo couldn't help thinking it was strangely hypnotic, but his sharp mind kept him on task. He took another look at the rafters, searching. When one of the green oscillating lights moved down he caught a glint of something. “I have a visual on a shooter.” He called into the comm.

 

“Where, I don't see 'em?” Jesse called back at him, his voice more tense than Hanzo had ever heard it.

 

“South east of you, it's possible she's blocked by the scaffolding. I am moving to get in position.”

 

“Wait, Hanzo!”

 

He ignored the calls, slipping into the shadows around the stage and finding his bow under a tarp near the speakers. Slipping it over his shoulder he waited till the music picked up and the lights shifted before scaling one of the speaker towers, moving up to where it framed the stage and hooked to the light scaffolding. From this vantage he had a clear shot and the sniper should be too focused on Lucio to notice him.

 

“I am moving into position. Before she takes the shot I will shield him.” Reinhardt called, the noise of the crowd echoing in the ear piece. He was inside the concert hall now.

 

“I'm moving as well. Still no visual.” Jesse responded.

 

Bracing himself, Hanzo lined up the shot but waited. She had a clear shot. What was she waiting for? He heard the music drop and then go silent, the lights going dim as the song finished. His heart pounded as he understood. As an assassin there was always beauty in a poetic kill. To let the lights go off with the idol alive only to have them come back with the man shot would be something a cold blooded killer may delight in. Though he was no longer part of that world he now knew why she waited. With the lights off and his eyes adjusted he could see the rifle barrel and let the arrow fly. The rifle shot filled the silence and the crowd screamed. The sound of exploding glass and crackles of sparks from a shattered light was all that resulted. Her aim had been thrown off by his arrow.

 

Beneath him chaos erupted and he thought he heard Reinhardt calling but his eyes were on the woman who met his gaze before bolting. “Sniper fleeing at the east end. I am in pursuit.” He called before taking off after her. If they could catch one of them they might be able to get an idea of what Talon planned. If he caught her then he could prove that him being here was not a mistake.

 

“I've got his back.” Jesse's voice seemed far away in his ear but he slightly understood.

 

“Target secure, we're escorting him from the premises.” Lena responded.

 

“Hanzo, McCree, I shall assist.” Genji's voice seemed to snap Hanzo out of his single minded pursuit.

 

“No, stay with the target. There may be more than one.” He snapped the order without thought. Logically it made sense to not spread the defense around Lucio too thin but also there was a part of Hanzo that instinctively sought to keep Genji from risk. Perhaps an old habit.

 

Moving faster he busted into the stairwell and raced up them, chasing the fleeing footsteps. He heard the door to the roof open and slam shut. There was enough of a gap in time from hearing the door and reaching it that forced him to make a quick decision. Hanzo quickly rolled, kicking the door open and using his bow to smack the rifle barrel upward as another shot went off. She'd been waiting for him. Spinning he kicked out, making faint contact as the sniper tried to leap away. His hand was reaching back, sliding an arrow from the quiver and notching it as he turned on his knee, meeting the sniper's gun pointed at his head with his own arrow at her's.

 

It had been hard to tell in the darkness but her hair was a jet black that seemed to take on a violet hue and her skin was so blue he wondered for a moment if the light was still playing tricks on him. Her yellow eyes held a cold, murderous intent before relaxing as she smiled. “Hanzo Shimada, a pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

 

His lip twitched. “I am sorry I cannot say the same.” This must be the infamous Windowmaker. He now understood why she was considered so dangerous. They were at a stalemate. She could pull the trigger the second he let the arrow go resulting in both their deaths. He debated the benefits of going that route.

 

She seemed amused by his answer and chuckled, though something about it felt wrong. “A pity we must meet this way.” The french accent was thick as she spoke. Her words like honey but lacking any wamrth, nothing like someone else he knew.

 

“I doubt I would seek to meet you in any circumstances.” He spat, a streak of arrogant defiance filling his eyes.

 

“Your abilities are wasted on them.” She cooed. “Overwatch is nothing but washed up soldiers and children pretending to save the world. You should consider allying yourself with those who benefit you more.”

 

Furrowing his brows he frowned. “Oh?”

 

“Talon could restore your family's empire.” She whispered it as if that might entice him more. A seduction in the form of a promise over what she believed he wanted.

 

He debated once more simply killing her, and himself as a result to ensure she did not leave here when he saw movement behind her. The shadow was unrecognizable except for the very distinct shape of that hat. “But at what cost I wonder?” Hanzo's attention turned back to her, keeping her attention on him as Jesse came up behind her.

 

She seemed to be sufficiently distracted but the second the cowboy about had her she turned to smack the butt of her rifle at him while arching back to avoid Hanzo's shot. Fortunately Jesse caught the attack but stumbled back, almost losing his footing.

 

Hanzo took the opportunity to try and make a move, reaching to disarm her. He didn't notice the shadow at his side till it was too late. As he twisted the gun in the woman's hands he caught sight of a barrel of a shotgun aimed right at his head.

 

“Hanzo!” Jesse's voice was heard first before someone pushed into him, shoving him down right as the shot went off. When he hit the ground he heard a pained grunt and tried to figure out if that was him or the man on him.

 

“Tch. Stupid ingrate.” The voice was almost inhuman, gravely and ethereal in it's tone. It sent a chill down Hanzo's spine.

 

Jesse lifted himself but there was a sluggishness in his movements. “Sorry, can't have you killing my partner now. I'm mighty fond of him.” He grinned, peacekeeper aimed at the black clad man.

 

Hanzo got to his feet, gripping his bow as they all stared at one another.

 

“Typical. Getting distracted from the mission. You always made things harder than they needed to be, kid.” Raising the shot guns it was clear the man had no intention of backing down.

 

They both rolled, missing the shots. Hanzo saw the woman lift her gun and rolled again as she sprayed bullets at where he'd been. He launched an arrow, barely missing her as she dodged. A part of him wanted to ignore her and help Jesse but he had to trust the man could handle himself. They were not outmatched yet.

 

Lunging he set another arrow that she blocked with her gun before shooting at him, trying to get distance between them. Hanzo didn't allow it and moved with purpose. When she turned to launch some sort of spider-like contraption at him he shot it from the air before it reached him. A plume of violet mist erupted from it and he moved around it quickly, recognizing it for some sort of gas. They danced around one another, their shots not quite landing.

 

Sending three arrows quickly in various arching shots he distracted her long enough to get in her face and tried to grab the gun again. They grappled and twisted, elbows and arms trying to gain an advantage. Shifting his weight he twisted her arms harder to try and break her grip and almost had her when he heard a shot and a groan of pain.

 

Instinctively his gaze went to the two men who'd been fighting nearby. Jesse was on his knees, his hat having fallen off and laying on the ground near him as he held his arm. The man in black stood over him with his gun aimed at the cowboy. “Jesse!” He called his name without thought, panic rising in his chest. The distraction was a mistake and his head spun as the rifle cracked against his brow. His hands released the woman and he tried to shake the stars from his eyes, worried she'd managed to get a shot lined up.

 

Whether it was luck or a happy coincidence a shot went off not from neither of their adversaries but from the neighboring roof. Hanzo's attacker cursed and glared, something she saw making her stand down. “We have company.” She called to the man.

 

The dark figure growled, something apparently compelling him to finish off the cowboy in front of him despite the warning. Instead he groaned in pain as a pair of rockets smacked and exploded against him, sending him sprawling. Skidding along the floor, he gave out an agitated and angry growl, turning to the next roof over. “Retreat for now. The mission is a failure.”

 

Before Hanzo could understand what had just happened they both leaped from the roof, leaving him and Jesse alone. He tried to see what they'd been looking at but other than two faint shadows that disappeared quickly from view there was nothing. The shaky grunt near him caught his attention and he hurried to the cowboy leaning down. Jesse's left arm was bleeding, a trail of crimson blood running down over the prosthetic. “You've been shot.”

 

“Just a flesh wound.” Jesse assured him, though something about his expression seemed off, like he'd seen a ghost. “Just clipped me a bit.”

 

“It's bleeding badly.” Hanzo insisted, trying to figure out what he could use to stop the bleeding. He wasn't even aware of the voices in his ear till Genji called for him.

 

“Hanzo, your status?”

 

“I am here with Agent McCree. We had a run in with both Widowmaker and I believe the Reaper.” He couldn't imagine who else that had been. “Agent McCree is wounded.”

 

“I'm fine, it's nothing.” Jesse quickly added, his breathing heavy.

 

“We've gotten Lucio on board the jet and are preparing for takeoff.” Winston interjected. “Talon was on our heels so it may take time for an extraction.”

 

Of course it could not be so easy. Hanzo looked at Jesse and made a decision. “Get the target back to safety. We can manage to get back to the safe house and await an extraction later.” He was sure he could clean and dress the wound for now.

 

“But McCree's injury?” Winston questioned.

 

“It is nothing I cannot see to till you can come back for us.” He met the cowboy's eyes, something in them making him feel that the wound was not entirely the issue.

 

“I can bring it back around to get you first thing in the morning, luv.” Lena now responded. “I'll be quick so just hang tight you two.”

 

“Understood.” He thought she had sounded just a little concerned and it was a strange feeling to think they were valued by them so much.

 

“Please check in the second you get back to the safehouse.” Winston insisted.

 

“We will.”

 

“Agent Hanzo?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Stay safe.”

 

He could understand them worrying over Jesse, but about him? It was a strange and new feeling. “Understood.” He said again, helping Jesse up. While the bullet may not have gone in, it had torn the man's arm up enough to cause sufficient bleeding and at this rate Jesse would pass out. Reaching for the hem of his shirt he tore it, getting a decent strip to wrap around the man's arm, tying it off. That would have to do for now. “Jesse, lean on me.” He looped the man's good arm around his shoulders and braced him.

 

“My head's spinning.”

 

“It's because you lost too much blood.” He huffed, though there was no playful tone or edge. He was worried. “We need to get back to the safe house and I'll bandage it properly.” Though the wound was bleeding more than desired Jesse seemed to be more catatonic than was necessary and Hanzo wondered if something else was wrong. Jesse still had a haunted look in his eyes when he looked at him.

 

“Can't believe he's alive.” The comment was muffled as if Jesse was speaking to himself.

 

Hanzo wasn't sure if the man was talking to himself or him.

 

“My hat...” There was slight resistance in their movements and Jesse started to look around. “I need my hat.”

 

“Is it really so important? You're bleeding-”

 

“Please.”

 

With a sigh he looked around, finding it nearby and carefully reached to grab it. “There, I have your silly hat.”

 

“It's important...”

 

“Just stay conscious. I do not wish to carry you the entire way.” He tried to keep him talking, moving back downstairs slowly before using every back alley to get back to the safe house.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Briefly checking in with Winston, Hanzo carried whatever medical supplies he could to the bedroom where Jesse was laying down. They'd somehow managed to get back in one piece and as he'd been digging for supplies he realized he had a sizable gash at his hair line where Windowmaker's rifle smacked him. It was barely anything to worry about though. He had to take care of Jesse's wound first.

 

He set the disinfectant and bandages down and leaned over the man. “Can you sit up?”

 

Amber brown eyes met his and Jesse nodded, slowly getting up. “Head's not spinnin' so bad now.”

 

“That is good.” Hanzo assured him, sitting down next to him as he helped him remove his body armor and shirt. Fortunately the need to care for the wound distracted him from seeing the man half naked. He had more important things to worry about than frivolous memories right now. Slowly he cleaned the wound, taking great care as he wiped the blood and inspected the damage. Jesse probably need stitches but he had nothing to use so a proper bandaging was all he could offer. “It's going to scar badly.”

 

“So? Not like it's the first.” There was a tiny chuckle but something was so halfhearted about it.

 

It was tempting to ask about it. Hanzo was not so oblivious he failed to notice how odd the man was being. “What happened?”

 

“What d'ya mean?”

 

He frowned, glaring at the wound as he rubbed the disinfectant soaked rag over it. “You're acting strange.”

 

“Am I?”

 

“Jesse.” Hanzo looked up, glaring but the sharpness in it disappeared.

 

The larger man stared at him with a pained expression, something so weak in him that it ceased any argument that may have started. Eventually that intense, sad stare broke away. “Just...had a moment where I thought I might have known who that was.”

 

“You mean the Reaper?”

 

“Yeah, he...said something that...well, no one else ever said to me but one person.” Jesse was chewing at his lip, a habit when he wanted a smoke but had none. “It just spooked me a bit and then the asshole tried to take a shot. I barely moved in time, but he still got my arm.”

 

Hanzo's focus had gone back to bandaging the man's arm as he listened to him, afraid questions would make Jesse clam up once more.

 

“I mean, people don't just come back from the dead, right?” He turned to look at Hanzo questioningly.

 

“Are you really asking me that question?” His brows raised and he lifted Jesse's arm slowly to start looping the bandage.

 

“Right...right....”

 

They fell into silence again as Hanzo finished up. “There. I am no Doctor Ziegler, but you will live.” He pulled back and began to clean up the bloody rags.

 

“Thanks, Darlin' – Hey, you're hurt.” Reaching out, Jesse's thumb rubbed along Hanzo's temple near the wound, the skin around it taking on a purple hue.

 

“It's nothing.” He tried to pull away, not wanting to make a big deal out of it.

 

“No, you got me patched up. Let me at least have a look.” Jesse forced Hanzo to stay seated and made the man turn to him, looking at the wound.

 

Hanzo's nerves were on high alert. Jesse's hand was rough and warm, but his touches were gentle as he began to clean the wound. He flinched a few times and the cowboy muttered soft apologies. Hanzo didn't have the courage to explain the flinches were because those delicate touches reminded him of a night long ago. He'd managed to keep enough distance between them to avoid such a situation but he couldn't run from this.

 

His eyes stared at the far wall, knowing Jesse's eyes were on him, his fingers running along his temple and into his hair. He was focusing so hard he noticed too late that the wound had long since been cleaned and yet those hands had not left his skin. Against his better judgment he looked over and froze.

 

Looking back at him, Jesse's haunted eyes from earlier seemed completely gone and instead were those warm and tender eyes that had pulled his guard down once before. Slowly the hand cradling Hanzo's head moved along his cheek and jaw, a thumb running along the edge of his lips. A heavy breath caught in Hanzo's throat and his eyes closed briefly when that hand moved along the side of his neck. He blinked slowly and leaned into the touch without thought, his lips parting.

 

Jesse mimicked the movement as his gaze dropped to Hanzo's mouth and he leaned closer.

 

He knew he should stop him, say something about him getting rest but words died in his throat the second their lips touched. Walls crashed down and he leaned into it, his tongue seeking the taste that had plagued his thoughts for years.

 

Jesse groaned and pushed him back, the pair falling onto the bed as their hands sought to touch what they'd been resisting. The cowboy's hands pushed up the torn shirt Hanzo still wore, moving along his body and igniting feelings and desires that had been withheld.

 

Arching up, Hanzo wrapped his arms around Jesse and tangle his fingers in that messy hair, recalling the uncanny softness of it and the heat the man's body radiated as it pressed into him. It was the faint groan of pain that cleared his addled thoughts. “Jesse....you're hurt.”

 

“Don't care.” The man growled and bowed over him, using both hands to shove the shirt up over Hanzo's head before he captured his mouth in a deep and hungry kiss.

 

Any protest disappeared. The archer groaned and gasped as his bottom lip was gently sucked and tugged, forcing him to chase Jesse's mouth desperately. He ran his hands along that wide back, his fingers feeling old nicks and scars that seemed to litter the cowboy's body. His mapping of the other man's body was stalled when a large hand slid into the back of his pants, grabbing tightly at his ass.

 

“Wanted to get you out of these clothes the second I saw you.” Jesse muttered gruffly, his mouth ghosting over Hanzo's ear. “Wanted to kiss you the second I saw you outside the base weeks ago.”

 

“Jesse...ah!” He couldn't resist, arching against him, his hips pushed up into Jesse's. Logic told him to break away. He couldn't do this. He didn't deserve this, but his heart seemed to overpower it and he grabbed at the larger man more desperately. Hanzo's hand reached down between them, gripping at the bulge forming in the cowboy's jeans, and squeezed.

 

That action pulled a deep groan from the Jesse, and he bucked into Hanzo's hand harder as he slipped his hand from inside the archer's jeans to try and get them off the smaller man instead. “I want you so bad, Darlin'. You drive me so crazy.” He bit at Hanzo's ear as his fingers deftly undid the button of the jeans and tugged the zipper down. “You can't look at a man like that and not expect me to break.”

 

Hanzo couldn't seem to wrap his head around the words. Had he done something? He didn't know and didn't care right now. He wanted Jesse's hands on him, his voice in his ear. He wanted his warmth to fill every inch of his cold body so he forgot everything if only for a moment. Their kissing grew more rampant as their hands struggled to get undressed. Hanzo had barely managed to get Jesse's pants off his hips before he was struggling to not cry out loudly as a hand grabbed him. His memory had not done this justice.

 

Breaking the kiss the larger man sucked at Hanzo's throat, causing a gentle sting as he left a reddening bruise before moving down to his shoulder. His tattoo burned under the kisses that Jesse trailed all the way down to his wrist before turning his hand to kiss his palm. He struggled between feeling too overwhelmed to look at him but unable to turn away. “Jesse, hurry.”

 

“Can't take anymore?” Smirking those amber eyes watched Hanzo with heated amusement before dipping down and kissing down the archer's chest.

 

Hanzo took advantage of the moment to tangle his fingers in Jesse's hair, the heat rising in his body and ragged pants leaving his lips when he felt a tongue along his hip bone. It was a wet searing pain that tingled right to his groin and before he could tell the man once more to hurry he felt that sinful mouth wrap around his aching length. “Ah!”

 

Too much, not enough. He couldn't decide. There were too many emotions to untangle and it left him at the cowboy's mercy. The wet slurp signaled a small reprieve as Jesse pulled his mouth off him but then his legs were lifted and he gasped, as that tongue found a new victim. With nowhere to grab but the sheets he tugged them up, the sweat beading on his skin. “Jesse...!”

 

“Love when you say my name.” Came a purr somewhere between Hanzo's legs and then that tongue was once again nudging against his ass before a finger pushed in. “Wanna take my time but I also can't wait.” The kisses trailed back up Hanzo's side.

 

He reached down to grab the scruffy man's face and pull him back into a kiss as he felt another finger push in. The familiar tickle of the man's beard against his own, the scratching as they kissed rough and messy. Hanzo hooked a leg around Jesse's waist, wanting him closer, feeling his cock hard against his stomach. “Don't wait.” He rasped and dragged his tongue across the man's chapped lips.

 

That seemed to trigger something because another finger pushed in and began to rock inside him. It ached and burned, but Hanzo didn't have the will to stop the man. He couldn't wait and a part of him feared that he'd wake up from whatever dream this was before they could get farther. Yet, Jesse didn't allow Hanzo to rush him through this, slowing the kiss and distracting him as his fingers prepared him. “Dammit, Jesse...”

 

“Shhh.” The cowboy's lips blew air against Hanzo's before kissing again. “Let me at least treat ya right, Hanzo.”

 

That was what he was worried about. He couldn't take how gentle the man was like this. He felt as if he was doing something he shouldn't. He shouldn't be treated so gently, so lovingly. So why did he crave it so much?

 

By the time Jesse finally entered him he had given up fighting his thoughts, sinking back in the bed and wrapping his arms tightly around his precious cowboy as they rocked together, wanting to never let him go.

 

“Fuck, Hanzo, I ain't gonna last, Darlin'.” Those frantic breaths and stuttering voice murmuring against Hanzo's cheek entranced him. The rest of the man's words were lost under Hanzo's cries as he came, everything in him unraveling as he fell back against the bed and Jesse collapsed on top of him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY! Right? Right? *Nervous laughter*
> 
> Anyways I was tempted to get full smutty descriptive but I felt the tone didn't call for it just yet. The chaos of emotions and desires bursting leaves a lot of blurry thoughts so for now I thought this sufficed. I just love these two.
> 
> See you guys next chapter. There might be a few more days between this chapter and the next as I prepare for my husband's B-day party.
> 
> Thank you once again for the kudos and comments and if you'd like feel free to hit me up and say hi on my Tumblr.   
> the-ryuchan.tumblr.com


	7. Denial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a night of passion Jesse and Hanzo have some talking to do. Or do they? Despite knowing a discussion must take place Hanzo seems to be dead set on avoiding it entirely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHHH I'm so sorry. I had a very busy week and weekend and was exhausted so this chapter is barely going up on Sunday for the west coast. Still I got it out. I hope you are all still enjoying this and I'll be able to get a couple chapters maybe out before next weekend.
> 
> Thank you for all the comments and kudos. I love reading all the comments and hearing what you all think or scenes you like. It really helps motivate me to keep going and not fall into laziness even when I'm busy.
> 
> Also sorry for any mistakes. I didn't get a chance to read this over as much as usual since it's late and I really wanted to keep with my goal of updating every Sunday at least.

His arm hurt like a bitch. Shifting in bed he reached out to find it cold and empty and cracked an eye open. While his head was foggy he distinctly remembered falling asleep with Hanzo next to him but the archer was nowhere to be found. Pushing up he flinched and glanced at on his arm, the remnants of dried blood sticking to the bandages reminding him of his careless disregard for it last night. He hadn't cared though. He had Hanzo close and damn if that man wasn't looking at him in that way. Everything he'd told himself about just being friends and carrying on disappeared and he'd dove in head first. Jesse hadn't been the only one either. Hanzo had entirely melted under him, grabbing at him in that sweet desperate way he had four years ago.

 

So where the hell was he? Jesse dragged himself out of bed, seeing no sign of his clothes from last night on the floor. Actually he noticed there was some fresh clothes on the nightstand. Had Hanzo left these out for him?

 

There was a creak of floorboards at the door and Jesse turned to find Hanzo looking clean and crisp. No sign of that desperate, disheveled appearance from last night. “Good, you are awake. Lena will be arriving shortly with the transport. I left clothes out for you.”

 

“Yeah, thanks.” He looked down to try and think of what to say, “Hey Hanzo about-” but when he looked back up Hanzo was gone, doing something in the other room. While Jesse tried not to see that as a giant red flag he struggled to think it was anything else. Sure he might just want to hurry back and not keep the others waiting but things had happened last night. Important things.

 

Jesse climbed out of the bed and got dressed, his mind trying to go over everything. He hadn't pressured Hanzo had he? No, there was no way. There'd been no protest. He was sure he hadn't missed a cue from the man. Hanzo hadn't even pushed him away, instead grabbing onto Jesse like he couldn't stand the idea of letting go. It had felt like they'd been on the same damn page for the first time since they met again. So what the hell was with the distance?

 

When Jesse entered the main living area he saw Hanzo on his datapad looking over something. Probably the mission report or maybe Genji contacted him. It took him a moment to realize Hanzo had his hair down, hanging over to the side and as the man shifted Jesse realized why. Right on the man's neck in plain sight was the dark red bruised he'd sucked into the archer's pale skin. It made sense to hide it. Like either of them wanted people questioning what happened here last night but a small childish part of Jesse wanted Hanzo to leave it on display and not hide it. “When's Lena supposed to be here?”

 

“Shortly.” Hanzo didn't even look away from the datapad. “In fact we should go to meet her now. I do not want her to have to wait for us and you need to see Doctor Ziegler as soon as possible.”

 

“”It's not that bad. Just got jostled last night while-”

 

“My bandaging was just to hold you over. You need to see her as soon as possible.” Hanzo cut off the cowboy as if he didn't want him to finish that sentence.

 

Taking the hint Jesse decided they'd discuss this once they got back and he was properly patched up. Hanzo wanted to talk about it too he was sure. He had to, right?

 

That train of thought was slowly derailing as they met up with Lena and boarded the transport carrier. Hanzo didn't meet his eyes and seemed to busy himself in every way so Jesse couldn't find a moment to speak with him. The tension was so damn thick even Lena looked at him a bit worried before taking off.

 

When he'd been sufficiently patched up and given a stern talking to by the doc he went in search of Hanzo, but like that first few days when they'd meet again the archer seemed to be avoiding him. Unlike last time Jesse was not as understanding. This wasn't just some awkward meeting after a long ago one night stand. He and Hanzo had just had one of the most passionate nights he'd ever had and now they were somehow worse off than they'd been a couple months ago.

 

Dammit he wanted a smoke but he was banned for a couple days while he healed and as much as he could give two shit about his health he didn't want to piss Angela off. That left drinking alone in his room and since he wasn't fit company for anyone right now he opted for it. He'd just have to find Hanzo tomorrow and hope they could talk about this.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Hanzo had purposely avoided everything. It wasn't as though he thought it the best option he just wasn't prepared to talk about it. He knew Jesse wasn't an idiot. He knew the man could tell he was avoiding the entire ordeal. Why was he so stupidly impulsive? Hanzo knew they shouldn't have but those brown eyes had bored into his soul and those rough lips stole his breath. Things had been about as chaotic as a storm and his body was paying for it a little. Despite protesting the doctor wished to see him just in case. She'd given him some cream for the head wound and checked his bruises just in case before letting him go. Had he not flinched a bit getting up he might have escaped the next conversation.

 

“Hanzo, are you injured elsewhere?” Doctor Ziegler questioned, eyeing him carefully.

 

“It is nothing.” He muttered.

 

It was extremely unsettling to literally watch someone put together the pieces. Hanzo knew she'd seen the mark on his neck. She could tell some of the bruises on his hips and torso were from hands grabbing just a bit too roughly. “Here.” She went to her cabinet and pulled out some muscle relaxers and pain killers. “Take these and get some rest for today.”

 

Slowly he extended his hand, taking the two bottles. “Thank you.” He mumbled out, feeling heat rise up his body. He was embarrassed and ashamed. If anyone else here could vouch that he was undeserving it was this woman. She most likely was appalled he'd dared to put his hands on Jesse, a beloved and cherished member of Overwatch.

 

“Hanzo?”

 

His eyes looked up and he lifted his head, not even aware he'd been shrinking back.

 

“If you need _anything_ , please let me know.” The comment said so much. There was no judgment or pity but concern for whatever it was he needed.

 

Slowly he nodded then excused himself to leave.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Hanzo managed to avoid the talk with Jesse for a couple days at the most. The day after they'd returned from their mission they all had a meeting to introduced Lucio and Hana as their newest members. The two were both energetic and bright, bringing a new dynamic to the group.

 

Hana seemed delighted to be a member and exuded a mature confidence about her that Hanzo could see was due to her training. She was a soldier after all and though she was young it was easy to see in the way she carried herself. Amongst a sea of adults no one talked down to her when discussing Overwatch Business. Sure there was a fondness for the youngest member in the way Reinhardt seemed to dote on her even as he asked for an autograph, but when a moment later she turned to Winston to explain a lead she might have the mood around her shifted.

 

The elder Shimada was surprised when Lucio came over to him though. “Hey man, Hanzo, right? I heard you were the one who stopped that bullet meant for me. So I wanted to thank you.”

 

Hanzo cleared his throat and nodded. “Of course. It was the point of our mission after all. I was just in the best position to deal with the threat.” Why was he being humble? Normally he'd take pride but he didn't feel all that prideful. Probably because he'd half been rash and impulsive during the mission for selfish reasons. He'd wanted to feel necessary. He wanted to prove he belonged here so he'd taken more risks.

 

“Still, thank you. I mean I always expected Vishkar to send someone after me but to think they'd do it at a concert is crazy, man.” Despite his casual way of speaking it didn't feel off. Where Hanzo would have had walls up immediately, Lucio was welcoming and casual in a way that made anyone feel as if they were friends.

 

“Talon itself is a dangerous group. They do not fear making a spectacle out of their victories.” It was becoming clear Overwatch was needed despite what the world thought. Talon was dangerous and brazen in their actions. Widowmaker had even attempted to lure him to their side without hesitation. They'd use any and every tool to reach their goals and Hanzo thought, with a bitter pang in his chest, that it reminded him of how the elders had tried to drive the Shimada clan to that same end.

 

When the meeting was over Hanzo was quick to leave, slipping through the group before Jesse could catch up. He was half way to his room with the intention of hiding for a while before training when someone caught up to him. However, the voice that called to him was not the honeyed and charming drawl he expected but the cybernetic laced tone of his brother.

 

“Hanzo, I was wondering if perhaps you'd care to join me in meditation? I always find it calming after a mission.” The entire statement was so odd.

 

Hanzo turned, staring at the cyborg's visor. “You asking me to meditate feels like the world itself turned upside down. You used to hate meditation.”

 

The chuckle was undeniably his brother. “It was boring when I didn't think I had anything to reflect on.” Genji's head tilted. “I quite enjoy it now.”

 

Smiling just a little Hanzo sighed. “I suppose you have grown up a little then.” Maybe he did need to contemplate things. He couldn't avoid Jesse forever and perhaps he and Genji could try and talk or just exist in the same space without arguing. “Very well. I will join you.”

 

 

________________________________

 

 

“Greetings, Hanzo. I am pleased that you shall be joining us this fine afternoon.” The omnic monk Zenyatta gave a wave of his hand in greeting as the Shimada brothers arrived at a quiet sunny alcove along the cliff face around the base. It was an ideal spot for mediation providing the weather as not unforgiving.

 

The issue was Hanzo had not expected the monk to join them. He wasn't entirely pleased about it but it shouldn't have been a surprise seeing as his brother was always with him. It was not as though Hanzo had any hate toward Omnics but he also didn't like being around them. The reason simply being he could not read them in the way he was used to. Growing up he'd been taught how to read people and pick out actions and expressions that could signal betrayal. It was a skill that had saved Hanzo from assassins and even employers who sought to double cross him in his wandering days. Yet most omnics had no facial cues to lean on. Most anything could be found in their tone and even that left little to pull from. So Hanzo was always left uneasy and ill equipped when dealing with any omnic.

 

The Monk was no different. His calm way of speaking only made Hanzo more uneasy, expecting deceit hidden among the kind words. His tension seemed to be noticeable too since Genji stopped beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Brother?”

 

Not wanting to cause an argument he moved away and went to sit down. “I am fine.” He assured his brother though did not look over at Zenyatta. The monk said nothing more either and he was grateful for it.

 

The three of them sat quietly, each relaxing into a meditative state without instruction. The sun was warm but the sea air still held a certain chill that was both soothing and shocking to his skin. When his mind drifted within itself he hardly noticed it though. The tension and worries and chaotic thoughts seemed to fall away and allowed him to think clearly. The problem was his clear thoughts were urging him towards places he was actively trying to push away. The relationship that he shared with Jesse sounded so simple but oh it was anything but. The broken relationship with Genji could be repaired but his mind wanted to remind him of so many problems. The scars and old hurts and bitterness demanding to be amended. Before he could stop it his meditation became a torrent of emotions he could not control and his eyes snapped open before squinting at the blazing sunlight. His chest was tight and heartbeat erratic, the exact opposite of what meditation was supposed to do.

 

“Is this place unsuitable for you, Hanzo?” Zenyatta's voice called out and while it should have sounded annoyed there was only an odd concerned tone.

 

“No, it is fine.” He muttered gruffly. “Perhaps my mind is just too cluttered to properly do this.” A poor excuse. Regardless he should have been able to discipline himself to continue and push aside everything.

 

“Inner peace cannot be forced. Perhaps we can merely talk if that will help to calm your mind. I find distraction from some things can help one focus on a single aspect of their discontent.” So understanding and reasonable.

 

“Does it have something to do with McCree?” Genji interjected brazenly.

 

Hanzo stiffened, the idea of his brother asking such a thing and butting in making him reject talking all together.

 

“Genji.” Zenyatta's voice actually had a warning tone to it.

 

“My apologies master.” Genji didn't stop though and fell into Japanese as he continued. “ _Aniki, I saw the mark. Did something happen on the mission?”_

 

Hearing his brother speak of the hickey on his neck caused Hanzo to think of the other night and he looked away. “ _I do not wish to speak of this now.”_ or ever. How could Genji ask in front of his supposed master? Was their relationship so open that his brother could not see how personal this was to talk about now?

 

_“I am not against it. I think he would be good for-”_

 

 _“Genji!”_ Hanzo's screamed the name and was on his feet, his eyes wide and angry even if he didn't look at him. “There is nothing to talk about. This mark and my dealings with Jesse are not your concern or business.”

 

Genji tilted his head. If he was at all bothered by Hanzo's outburst there was no way to tell. “I've noticed it before but I didn't want to say anything.” The voice was thoughtful in tone and quiet though not enough that the wind drowned it out. “You say his name a certain way that is different from everyone else.”

 

Hanzo swallowed hard. Was that true? Was he being obvious? Was he being careless? The memory of Jesse commenting on his expression compounded the worry. Somehow he'd been letting his inner desires leak out when he knew he needed to contain it, lock it up, force it to the deepest reaches of his mind and heart.

 

“While I feel as though this matter is one of many that plague your brother, Genji, I also feel it is not your place to bring it up when your brother is so against discussing it.” Zenyatta finally spoke once Hanzo had not responded. The omnic's attention turned to Hanzo then, his impassive face not betraying anything about what he'd been hearing. “Peace cannot be forced anymore than it should be denied.”

 

There it was. There was something hidden in that. Accusing? No, not that but it was as if the monk was telling Hanzo he was denying himself. Maybe so but it was with good reason. The omnic could not understand him or his life. While peace may be something he could have at moments he did not deserve the level of content and happiness that others would.

 

Hanzo left, not excusing himself or saying good bye. He needed to be away from others. His brother, Jesse, and Overwatch should not supply him with comfort and peace. In a stupid moment of idealism and childishness he'd let Jesse McCree sweep him up and even now his skin burned with those rough touches and sweet words. The memory of four years ago was brighter and more vivid supplied with what had recently happened. The mark on his neck sent a shudder up his back whenever he saw it in the mirror or remembered it. When people saw it but said nothing he felt deep shame and yet possessive pride. Yes, Jesse Mccree had allowed him close and marked his skin for all to see, had spoke his name sweetly and lovingly and he was everything Hanzo Shimada didn't deserve.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

The luck of avoiding Jesse ran out two days later. He was sneaking back from training, believing the cowboy to be busy with a check up with the doctor when he turned down a hall to his room and saw the man outside his room. There was no way he could simply slip back around the corner either because Jesse looked up at him the moment he came into view.

 

The accusing look in those brown eyes spoke a million things and Hanzo let out a very small sigh of resignation.

 

“We gotta talk.” Was all the man said, putting out his cigar and pushing away from the wall he'd been leaning on.

 

Of course they needed to. He knew they did but he'd half foolishly hoped Jesse would let things be. “Not here.” He muttered, not keen on talking in the middle of the hall and he did not want to let Jesse in his room for fear of giving in once more.

 

“Fine.” Conceding easily Jesse walked over to Hanzo and grabbed his hand, pulling him back the way Hanzo had come.

 

Feeling like a child being reprimanded he kept his head down as they went down another hall and into a small storage room. It was quiet and reclusive enough, and no one should bother them there. He watched Jesse shut the door and turn to him as if waiting for something but Hanzo had no idea how to begin.

 

“So we gonna talk about what happened?” There was a clip to his voice. It was a tone Hanzo did not like hearing after being spoken to so warmly most of the time. More silence followed the question and Jesse growled a sigh and slipped off his hat. The fingers of his prosthetic tangling in his messy hair in frustration. “Shit, will you say _something_?”

 

“I do not know what to say.” Hanzo admitted.

 

“Well you can start by sayin' why you've been avoiding me like the fucking plague. You know I've been trying to talk to you for days now?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“And you told Athena to lie about where you are if I asked?” He snapped.

 

“How did-”

 

“I asked her. You didn't tell her to lie about what you did if I asked that.” The scrape of the man's boots on the concrete floor announced his steps towards the archer. “Hanzo, you know that I meant everything I said.”

 

“You were not in your right mind, Jesse. What happened was just caused by confusion and nerves over the mission.” His practiced speech felt so weak now. Everything he'd prepared for this moment was falling apart under that gaze. Hanzo looked down as he struggled to keep his demeanor impassive.

 

“Bullshit. You and I both know that ain't it.” Jesse came closer, forcing Hanzo to back away into one of the shelves. “Hanzo, I ain't stupid. The way you were grabbing and kissing me-”

 

“Jesse, please.” He was begging. He was so ashamed of it but he prayed the man stopped.

 

“No, I was reasonable the last time cause the situation was different. We had a one-night stand and we knew that and I accepted it when you said we should be professional, but _this_ wasn't _that_. The other night was not that. You don't hold a person like that with the intention of it just being nothing in the end.” Now Jesse was entirely in Hanzo's space, the air between them heavy with heat. “Why don't you wanna admit that?”

 

“Fine, I admit it. It happened because I wanted it to but it shouldn't have.” The words burst out of Hanzo in a rush, anger and shame lacing his tone.

 

“Why shouldn't it have?”

 

“Because it shouldn't!” His back could not push harder against the shelf. He felt trapped both physically and emotionally. He knew very well he could push Jesse away and leave but his heart wanted the opposite. He wanted to pull Jesse closer and crush their lips together till he was dizzy and unable to think of anything. He must have been obvious again because when his eyes met Jesse the cowboy was looking at him with that soft, heated look like the other night in the safe house. “We can't.” He said shakily.

 

“Why? Why can't we?” That weakness in Jesse's words made Hanzo almost give in. “Darlin', I've been going out of my mind thinkin' of you. I just wanna understand why you seem to be runnin' from me when you look like you wanna do the opposite.”

 

Hanzo trambled as a hand traced his jaw, the feel of Jesse's breath on his face making his heart stutter. He did want the opposite. He wanted it so strongly it frightened him, but then that dark reminder would tell him how stupid it was. The blood on his hands reminded him he had no business holding Jesse the way he'd allowed himself the other night. “Jesse, please just pretend it didn't happen.”

 

“What?”

 

“What happened between us. Please let's put it aside and act as if it didn't happen. We were both not ourselves and acting rashly.” The practiced tone he thought he lost came back somewhat. His voice still sounded strange but he was as steady as he was going to get.

 

“You can't be serious?” Hurt, disappointment, anger? Any of those words could describe Jesse's tone. He stared at Hanzo shocked and confused.

 

“I am serious. I want to carry on as before.” He met the man's eyes, hoping he did not let anything slip again.

 

Jesse's eyes darted back and forth before he stepped back, turning. “So I'm just supposed to act like the other night just didn't happen?”

 

“Yes.”

 

A broken smile spread over Jesse's lips and he turned around, throwing his hand against the opposite wall. “God you are a real piece of work.”

 

Hanzo closed his eyes, his body going rigged. Yes, Jesse should be angry. He should want nothing to do with him.

 

“You know, if anyone else asked me to do what you are I'd tell them to go to hell?” There was anger in the usual warm voice but there was also a soft sadness and his broke Hanzo's heart to hear it and know he was the cause. “Fine. We'll bury it if that's what ya want.”

 

Looking up Hanzo stared at the cowboy's back.

 

When Jesse turned to him his expression was closed. The wall Hanzo had built seemed to grow thicker in that instant and it was both sad and necessary.

 

“Thank you, Jesse.”

 

“Don't...just....don't. I don't wanna hear thanks over this and I don't really think I can be around you for a bit.”

 

“I understand.” It made sense, but it hurt. How could he be so stupid to be upset over what he'd purposely caused?

 

“Yeah...” Jesse turned to grab his hat, fiddling with the brim as he stared at it with an odd expression. Before Hanzo could say something about it Jesse left the room, shutting the door gently, which seemed to have a stronger effect than if he'd outright slammed it.

 

Hanzo let out a shaky sigh and leaned back on the shelf, running a hand over his eyes as he squeezed them tight. He ignored the sting in them. He ignored the pain in his chest. He ignored it because he had to.

 

The one thing he could not ignore was knowing in that instant that he was in love with Jesse McCree.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry. I really am. I warned you all things weren't gonna be easy. 
> 
> But hey I got to write Zen a bit this chapter and he'll be making more prominent appearances in the coming chapters. I got some fun stuff planned not just for Hanzo but Overwatch in general.
> 
> See you all next update.


	8. A Past of Shackles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing can happen between them. They both know what Hanzo said but neither Jesse nor the resistant former Shimada Heir wish to entirely give things up. But how do you act normal around someone again after a fight like that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHHHH Surprise update. Next one will have to be Sunday as I have another busy weekend planned.
> 
> Sorry if the chapter isn't as actiony or fluffy. However I think you'll like the extra dose of Genji in this chapter.
> 
> Anyways enjoy everyone!

It was a hell of a situation. After the fight with Hanzo Jesse had gone back to his room to drink and regretted it. The alcohol didn't help like usual and instead of forgetting things he just remembered more. He just couldn't understand what the hang up was. Hanzo clearly wanted him to so why did they have to pretend things didn't happen between them again? He asked himself this question over and over till he passed out.

 

When Jesse woke the next day his head was throbbing and he rolled over in bed with a groan. He didn't want to get up. He didn't want to see Hanzo. He should be pissed. Livid with him. Instead he was just begging to know the reason behind it all. While it was unfair for Hanzo to ask these things of him he hadn't been able to be as angry as he wanted to. Kinda hard to hate on a guy who had the expression Hanzo did yesterday as he asked Jesse to pretend their romantic roll in bed never happened. He couldn't hate him and he couldn't be furious either. Things would be so much easier if he could.

 

The gunslinger laid in bed for longer than he should before Athena asked if he would be joining everyone else for breakfast. His head said no but his stomach said yes so he reluctantly crawled out of bed and into the shower. The hot water washed over him, making his hair fall over his eyes. He should cut it. He wasn't just a vagrant on the run anymore. If Overwatch was becoming a thing again he should at least look respectable.

 

By the time he got to the mess hall half the squad was gone and Hanzo was nowhere to be seen. He was a bit grateful since he wouldn't know what to do even if he saw the man. Probably make a damned fool of himself.

 

“JESSE!” Reinhardt's voice boomed across the room to the degree Jesse flinched from his throbbing head. “I was wondering if you'd wake up. It's not good to skip a meal, my friend.”

 

“Yeah, sorry, guess I slept in a bit.” He laughed, deciding the first thing he'd do is have a giant mug of coffee.

 

“Not everyone needs to consume an entire pantry to start the day like you, Reinhardt.” Torbjorn's surly frown was ever present next to the large German. He was tinkering away on something Jesse could only guess was a turret of some kind. It was an oddly familiar scene seeing them here like this. Almost like the old days.

 

“Nonsense! Breakfast is the most important meal. You cannot properly begin the day without it.” A large hand smacked the small Swede on the back as he laughed. “Oh, that reminds me Genji was wanting to talk to you.”

 

“Genji?”

 

“Yeah. He was here earlier but then his brother came and went and the lad chased after him.” The dwarf huffed. “That older brother is like a gloomy cloud.”

 

“And you are the ever present sun, are you, my tiny friend?” Rein laughed again, smirking down at his small companion. “Hanzo is trying to do the honorable thing. He was a great asset on the last mission as well. I admire his skill and perseverance.”

 

Torbjorn only grumbled at that, focusing on unscrewing something on the turret.

 

There was a small hint of pride in hearing that. Jesse didn't say anything but he was always glad the others were warming up to Hanzo which seemed odd now given their current situation. “Guess I should go find Genji then.” Jesse started to turn to leave but suddenly large hands hit his shoulders and he looked up to see Reinhardt leaning over him.

 

“Breakfast first, then you can worry about other things.” There was no arguing this and the cowboy was dragged to the kitchen to dish up some food and a large cup of coffee before he was allowed to go in search of Genji.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

“What is going on between you and my brother?” The question was sudden considering Jesse had been sitting enjoying a smoke while Genji and Zenyatta finished up their little meditation session. He almost dropped his cigar, staring at the cyborg who turned his attention to the cowboy.

 

“What ya mean?” He did not sound convincing in the least.

 

“Do not play dumb with me. If you wanted to be subtle you should have stopped yourself from leaving a huge hickey on Hanzo.”

 

Of course he saw that. Jesse hadn't exactly known what he'd been thinking at the time. He hadn't been thinking probably. He'd been too caught up in finally getting Hanzo so close. Hell, maybe he thought that Hanzo and him were finally deciding to take the plunge. He hadn't anticipated that the older Shimada would push back at him so fiercely. “Didn't think your brother needed permission to get involved with people.”

 

“So you admit you are involved.” Genji asked accusingly as if he caught Jesse in some elaborate lie.

 

“I didn't say that.” Chomping down in annoyance on the cigar, Jesse slipped his hat off to fiddle with it, the agitation and hurt from recent events still fresh. “Me and your brother ain't involved.”

 

Genji said nothing but faced in Jesse's general direction and the odd tension in the air seemed to speak enough for him.

 

“I swear we ain't!” His pleading words had no effect and while he could walk away he knew Genji was persistent enough to hound him till he caved. He only had boundless patience for one Shimada. “Okay fine, something happened but it don't matter none anyways.”

 

“Why not?” Now that head tilt. It was strange to be so familiar with all of Genji's little gestures even though they hadn't seen each other in years.

 

“That's what I'd like to know but he don't want nothin' to do with it.” His frustration seeped out. “We got a bit...involved back during the mission but then we get back here and he wants to just bury it and never speak of it again.” It still hurt. What hurt the most was knowing Hanzo wanted him in the same way. Yet they were stuck in this strange in-between.

 

“That sounds like Hanzo.” Genji sighed and got up. “He's content to make himself miserable to punish himself. I thought something odd was going on, but he was branching out and conversing with everyone so I didn't wish to push.”

 

“Genji, I swear I wouldn't put my hands on your brother with any ill intentions.”

 

“I know you wouldn't. I just...I tried to ask him about it with the intention to congratulate him but he became so closed and volatile that I was concerned. I thought perhaps....”

 

“That I went and broke his heart or somethin'?” Jesse ventured.

 

“Yes, though I see now it seems to be of his own making.” There was a sad and defeated tone to his voice.

 

Hearing the way Genji spoke of his brother reminded Jesse that Hanzo had a whole mess of demons still chomping at his back. The brothers hadn't entirely made up and even though Hanzo was warming to the other members of Overwatch he still withdrew frequently. Now this entire mess between them was adding more issues. “Your brother has a lot to think on.” He finally muttered, chewing on the cigar that was threatening to spill ash any moment. He flicked it and sighed. “I ain't no help either. I mean, he's a selfish ass but I also know I didn't put him in the best position.”

 

“What exactly did happen?” Genji asked curiously.

 

Jesse debated though. He wasn't sure how much he should disclose. What he should tell. “It's complicated. Let me just say our meet up a few years back was a little more than friendly and maybe there was some lingering...wants between the two of us. But it don't matter now cause your brother shut that down faster than a gun at a knife fight.”

 

Genji muttered something gruffly in Japanese and shook his head.

 

Sighing heavily Jesse crossed his arms. “As flattered as I am that you're so interested in my love life shouldn't you be more focused on talking with your brother? You two haven't had your talk yet, have you?” Plus maybe if they mended their relationship Hanzo might not be so dead set on pushing him away. It was selfish, but it felt like a lot of what was bother Hanzo stemmed from what happened with Genji.

 

Genji was quiet for a moment and his body language suggested he was not excited about the turn in conversation. “Not exactly. I tried to the other day but when I brought you up he got hostile. So bringing up our situation seemed unwise.”

 

“Yeah, well next time lead with the “I'm sorrys” and “let's talk about what happened” rather than what's going on between me and him.” Jesse muttered, feeling antsy thinking about this.

 

“Do you want something to be happening between you and him?” Genji's voice held a tone of amusement and curiosity. Something Jesse hadn't heard a lot of during the early Blackwatch years but came out more and more as time passed.

 

“Well, seeing as I haven't had a chance to really talk about any of that properly with him I don't wanna spill my guts about it just yet.” He grinned, lighting up a cigar.

 

“Stingy.”

 

“Hey, I don't go just pouring my heart out every day and when I do it usually is at the person it's toward.” Jesse chewed on the cigar. If he ever got the chance to actually talk with Hanzo honestly about it. He was a feeling a bit gun-shy after the harsh refusals.

 

“If I may interject.” Zenyatta had remained so silent until now Jesse forgot he was there. “Hanzo's turmoil seems to stem far deeper than just his prior deadly altercation with Genji. It seems to be something deeply ingrained within his soul.”

 

The words settled over Jesse and he blew out a puff of smoke, thinking on Hanzo. It was hard to be really, truly angry. Sure he was still ticked at him but like that was gonna keep Jesse away for long. It was hard to be bitter when a man looked like Hanzo had the other day. It was like it was killing him to say any of it. It was why he let it go. Maybe he could have fought back and tried to argue it all but if he had what sort of state would he force the archer into?

 

“In the clan Hanzo was always looked at with great pride. He excelled in so much and every praise from my father or mother was always well earned. In comparison it seemed I was only praised as a consolation.” Genji's voice had taken on a thoughtful tone now, gaining the attention of the other two beings present. “As a child I looked up to him, following his example but it seemed I could never quite excel as he could and his training was always more extensive than my own. So I began to try less. Admiration became bitterness and jealousy. Thinking on it now I can see how I was lead down such a path. A path of anger and resentment.”

 

“Well, I ain't got any siblings so to speak so I don't know anything about sibling rivalry but seems like what you felt was only natural.” Jesse took another long inhale of the cigar and blew the warm smoke from his lungs.

 

“Yes, but I failed to see that every feat my brother made was only due to great sacrifices on his freedom. When I saw him reading well passed lessons alone I assumed he enjoyed it all; that he embodied everything with no effort but that is unfair to him. I know he worked hard I just did not wish to see it because I wanted justification for my own selfishness. In my later years I was away from home so frequently that I no longer saw the slow progression but the effect of our families training on him.”

 

“What do you mean?” Jesse's brows rose.

 

Looking down as if remembering, Genji spoke again. “My brother used to smile much when we were children. He used to take my hand and show me everything. When I was allowed to wander alone with him he'd show me anything he thought I might like. I was in awe of him. He seemed to know so much of the world and was excited to share it with me.” He sighed. “It was I that let go of his hand first. I turned my back to him and left him to carry the burden of our family. I did not realize how deeply that burden could twist someone until his blade pierced me.”

 

Jesse had not heard Genji speak about that day since back in Blackwatch and back then the talks had been violent and angry. They sounded nothing like the way Genji spoke on it now. “It's hard to look back at things and realize how little control you have sometimes. Being stupid kids who know shit but you think you know it all. You think the praise from adults means you're doing right. I imagine your brother looks back and knows everything he did wrong but he don't think about the people that lead a kid down that path at the beginning. Same with you Genji. I ain't sayin' you both are innocent in everything but I think you both need to remember that breakin' free of a life you were taught is a damn hard thing to shake. It's something you started a long time ago, but your brother, well, he started back when he thought he killed ya. Problem is I don't think he ever took a step passed that first one.”

 

“You may be right. I thought perhaps he had begun to move forward when he arrived. He looked so much brighter than the last time I saw him but it seems it was only surface deep.” The ninja crossed his arms.

 

“Your brother is stagnating due to confusion over his place in the world. As McCree said you were both born and raised within a world that differs from the path you wish to walk now. Human habit is a hard thing to break and while you have broken free, my student, your brother still remains shackled. To what I cannot say.” Zenyatta lifted up from his meditative position. “I wish to speak with him but I feel as though my presence unnerves him.”

 

“Yeah, I noticed he kinda skirts around ya, Zen. Maybe it's on account of your super observant skills.” Jesse grinned, trying to lighten the mood. While he was glad to learn a bit more about Hanzo's life he felt as though talking about him behind his back wasn't gonna help much if they didn't act. Too bad he couldn't just fix the whole damn mess easily. He wasn't even most of the reason, if he was even a part at all. It could be Hanzo was really just still hung up over the fall out with Genji or maybe it was a hundred things.

 

“Regardless of his reasons I do hope that you can find the time to speak to him over these worries, Genji. To hear the reasoning for your actions and to hear Hanzo's in turn, perhaps you can reach a new state of enlightenment that can help lift the discord in your souls.”

 

“I suppose you are both right. I will need to find the time to talk with him.” However Genji seemed hesitant still.

 

Smacking the cyborg on the shoulder before looping an arm around him, Jesse grinned. “Whenever you feel you can. Ain't no use rushin' it. Think about it then when you're ready sit him down and have a good long talk.”

 

Chuckling Genji nudged him. “Thank you, Jesse. I am fortunate to have you as a friend.”

 

“Awww shucks, you'll make me blush if you keep sweet talking me like that.”

 

“Aaaand you've ruined it.”

 

“Harsh.”

 

Zenyatta laughed next to them, amused by their banter, the dark mood from earlier seemingly lifted.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

How did someone go about being normal around a man you felt so much for? It anyone knew Hanzo wasn't sure who, nor would he have the courage to ask. Things felt stiff and awkward whenever Jesse and himself were in a room. There was no doubt the man was angry with him. It was safe to say they would not be able to settle back into the comfortable atmosphere they once had.

 

Hanzo much to his shame, was too distracted by the thoughts of Jesse hating him to truly pay attention. Before he realized they were ending the meeting with agents being assigned to head to Russia with the hopes of getting some form of information from Katya Volskaya regarding her attempted assassination. He was not part of it but Genji and Jesse were. Perhaps it was for the best. He did not know what to say to either of them. His small tiff with Genji had not lead to a reconciliation and Jesse still did not meet his eyes. It didn't help every time they might hanzo looked away for fear of seeing anger, or worse, disappointment.

 

Shuffling out he waited till everyone had almost left before leaving himself. As he walked out the door he ran into a large, sturdy body, surprised he had been paying so little attention.

 

“Whoa there.” That smooth voice still unsettled Hanzo but in a way he could not let himself think about. When Hanzo looked up Jesse stared at him a bit wide eyed before he looked away. “Sorry. I forgot I had something to ask Winston.”

 

“It is alright. I am sorry that I had not seen you.” This felt awful. Worse than when they first met again here.

 

“No worries.” Slipping by Hanzo, Jesse rounded into the room before he was stopped by a hand grabbing at his serape.

 

Hanzo stared wide eyed, realizing he'd acted without thinking and quickly let go. “I...was wondering if, when you return, if you'd like some friendly competition in the practice range?” The comment was completely off the cuff since he was not sure what else to say. He hated they were distant even though he knew exactly why. Hanzo knew he shouldn't try and get close but he missed that comfort they once had.

 

There was a faint laugh and when Hanzo looked back at Jesse the cowboy was smirking a little. “Yeah, that sounds nice. The thought of kicking your ass when I get back from a successful mission sounds peachy.”

 

In turn Hanzo snorted. “Do not think yourself so sure to win, Cowboy.” He crossed his arms, back straight as if rising to the challenge. He was more pleased when he heard that loud, boisterous laugh from Jesse.

 

“We'll see who's the big talker once I get back.” With a wink and a hat tip he hurried to go back in the room, leaving Hanzo relieved and also mildly terrified.

 

This was not a good idea but he was also grateful they seemed to have been able to have a normal conversation.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

By the time they were boarded and on the carrier Jesse was lost in thought. Chewing on a cigar in nervous habit since he couldn't smoke in here, he went over what had happened. He'd been determined to give Hanzo space and maybe once his heart wasn't so raw talk things over. He had not expected the man to grab him like that with such a panicked expression. It was clear the archer had been floundering and if Jesse hadn't felt his chest tighten thinking how flustered Hanzo looked he might have taken the time to tease the man more. Instead he buckled the second Hanzo offered an olive branch despite knowing he should try and be mad at the older Shimada for a bit longer.

 

“Hah, I'm such a weak man.” He muttered to himself.

 

“Yes, you are.” Genji agreed next to him, humor in his voice. “Your face looked about as flattering as a schoolboy with a crush.

 

“You were watching?” Turning he glared at the cyborg.

 

“Oh yes, it was quite amusing.” Chuckling Genji's body shook a bit. “What happened to being mad at him?”

 

Jesse huffed and crossed his arms, biting harder on the cigar to the point he was gonna break it off. “As you can see I failed that step. Now I'm just acting like a doe-eyed fool cause your brother looked at flustered.”

 

“Give it time. I am sure he will incur your wraith again.”

 

“Doubtful.” Growling he sank lower in the seat, tugging his hat down. “I didn't think I had it this bad.” As he muttered the words he regretted them instantly.

 

“Oh, do tell.” As if eager to try and get any gossip over this complicated relationship, Genji leaned closer.

 

“Nope. No, forget I said anything. I don't need you gossiping.” He shoved the cyborg back, trying to cover his entire face with his hat now.

 

“Me? Gossip? To _my_ brother? Never.” It was nice that Genji seemed more playful now but god Jesse wanted to punch him sometimes. He imagined this was about as annoying as the younger Shimada had been to his brother at times. Granted he wasn't keen on hurting Genji but some tough love wasn't out of the question if the man kept poking.

 

“I hate you.” The cowboy grumbled and sighed when he just heard a cybernetic laugh fill the carrier.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, Genji, you little shit. I love writing him. Delving into the brothers' past and relationship growing up has been fun and I cannot wait for them to have that heat to heart. Just gotta go through some more drama till we get there.
> 
> Thank you to everyone reading and leaving me comments and kudos. I am truly very appreciative. I love rereading the comments as they motivate me to try and squeeze in a bit of writing each night even when I'm tired. You all give me energy with your kind words.
> 
> See you guys Sunday for the next chapter!


	9. Selfishly Hopeful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jesse and Hanzo are on speaking terms again but things are far from settled. While awaiting the return of the cowboy and his brother Hanzo finds himself further integrating into Overwatch as a whole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sunday update!
> 
> This chapter is mostly some sweet moments and set up for the new mission and new possible member into Overwatch. Next chapter should be pretty interesting and fun so hopefully you all look forward to it. I had fun writing Hana and trying to get that balance of playful speaking and yet maturity she has seeing as she's a child soldier and all.

Without Jesse or Genji around Hanzo was left to his own devices. There was no reason to really interact with anyone but it would also do him no good to be reclusive. He needed to try and interact if only to learn more about people he'd be working with to allow for missions to go more smoothly. He told himself that as he wandered into one of the common rooms, finding Hana sitting and gaming on a hand held device.

 

Hanzo was not entirely sure how to converse with her. While she was professional during meetings she was also very energetic and young when relaxing and he found it hard to keep up. In truth much of her bravado reminded him of Genji when he was younger.

 

The decision to leave came too late as the girl's gaze raised from her game and her face lit up. “Hey there, Mister Sharp Shooter.” Kicking off the couch she bounded over to him, her smile wide. “I never got the chance to thank you. I was a bit nervous about how good the new Overwatch actually was. I mean it's easy to call yourself the late, great, amazing Overwatch but to actually pull it off is another thing. Big talkers always annoy me.”

 

She was talking a mile a minute and he wasn't sure when to respond to her thanks or what it was for exactly.

 

“I've been a big fan of Lucio so the thought of helping him was important, but not only that I wanted to make sure you guys were up to snuff before I joined you.” She gave him a look over. “You use a bow and arrows, right?”

 

He nodded, still not sure where he should really join in the conversation or if he should let her talk.

 

“That's pretty cool. Kinda old school, but if you can take on a world renowned and infamous sniper than you must be pretty badass.”

 

There was a pause and he finally nodded again. “Thank you. I have heard you are also a skilled soldier as well.”

 

She beamed. “Yeah, I got some cred to my name, but I'm doing it to protect the people. That's why I signed on for the Meka program, but those assholes in the higher ups are being shady and so that's why I contacted Winston.” As she started talking about the men in charge she crossed her arms and huffed. “I signed on to protect people and my country but it feels like they're more worried about things that don't matter like profit.”

 

“Most of the time men in power will always seek a path that aligns with their own gain.” Hanzo muttered, nodding slowly. “It is admirable that you put your life at risk at such a young age.”

 

Hana shrugged. “It's no big deal. I hear you've trained as an assassin. Like it's your whole family's deal. Did you go and assassinate people at a young age?” While part of her expression spoke curiosity another part was judging him. Or perhaps she was trying to judge his character.

 

“We did learn many skills at a young age but I did not undergo my first assassination until I was your age. A man who had gone against my family. A dishonorable thief.” His gaze moved away from her. “The same lowly snake that my own family could be considered.”

 

 

Her brows raised. “Growing up in battle is pretty rough. I don't remember a time there wasn't a giant omnic attacking my home.” There was something forlorn and also so mature and sobering in her eyes.

 

Hanzo felt something like pity.. When he was growing up he was forced into the world of adults. He couldn't even remember being a child but Genji had been allowed that luxury. It was sad to think this girl was not allowed such a thing and he felt a sense of familiarity in her eyes. “Perhaps at the end of all this we shall see a different future for those that will come after us.”

 

Smiling Hana nodded. “I think so. Until then,” She clenched both of her fists, taking on a power stance, “I'm gonna knock down anyone who tries to stop us.”

 

Hanzo could only nod, wishing he had her energy. Admiring her strength.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

It was almost an entire week before they heard back from the group sent to Russia. Despite busying himself in the practice range and somehow getting roped into odd snack sessions and talking about past battles with Hana he found he had little else to do. There was a few times Lucio joined them and played music, but Hanzo found that he was merely a presence in the room as the two younger members chattered between themselves.

 

Even then at times he felt he should leave, feeling as if he was encroaching on their personal time together. They might not even be aware of how they acted around one another. It was innocent and natural. Something he felt a bit of envy for. Something that made his mind wander to a certain Cowboy no matter how he tried to fight it.

 

He was in the shooting range, trying to calm his mind and focus when Athena announced the carrier with the away agents was returning. He started moving to the docking bay before he could stop himself. It was foolish and overeager, but Hanzo told himself he was merely making sure both his brother and....friend were okay. He was not just going to see Jesse alone because he may have missed him.

 

Thankfully he was not the only one there and he shuffled to the edge, seeing the doctor there, probably to make sure no one was injured. He hoped both Genji and Jesse were safe. His eyes lifted to see the doors open and the ramp hit the ground before people began to exit the craft. First was Reinhardt, followed by Mei who seemed oddly flustered though Hanzo didn't feel the need to dwell on it. Next came both Jesse and Genji, talking to one another. Hanzo wondered briefly if he should leave. Seeing how easily his brother conversed with the cowboy and how Jesse in turn seemed so casual with Genji; he was envious, but the envy gave way to guilt because he knew he had no right to complain.

 

Hanzo was about to leave when he met Jesse's eyes and froze on the spot as he was graced with a smile that was...lovely.

 

“Hey, Hanzo. Didn't expect you to come greet us.” He moved faster, his stride much wider than Genji's who seemed to hang back anyways.

 

“I thought it best to make sure neither of you did something foolish and got yourself killed.” He muttered flatly, trying to remain impassive but he felt the corners of his lips tugging up.

 

Jesse laughed. “A fella always likes to have a nice warm welcome back. Kinda always wanted a sweet kiss with a “Welcome home” but I'll take what I can get.” The laugh continue for a moment until Jesse saw Hanzo's face and he immediately went rigged. “I mean...kidding. I'm kidding, Hanzo.”

 

He hadn't been aware of what face he made but when he heard that he'd been tempted. The idea of being so brazen and open with the other was a nice thought but not something for him. Why did he lack such control? Had he learned nothing over the last decade? His heart was fluttering like mad and it was all he could do not to appear too happy to see the cowboy back in one piece.

 

Now the awkwardness was back. Jesse didn't look at him or say anything and Hanzo was in a similar state.

 

“Ya still up for that friendly competition?” Jesse finally spoke, an attempt to break the bad mood hanging in the air.

 

“Competition?” Genji questioned. “That sounds like fun.”

 

What should have been a normal comment made Hanzo feel defensive and territorial. By all rights Genji was welcome to join but it was something he and Jesse did together. A single past time he had with the man he was allowed. He didn't like the idea of sharing that time. “I suppose you-”

 

“Sorry, Genji, this little competition is between me and Hanzo alone.” Cutting in before Hanzo reluctantly invited his brother, Jesse turned to face the cyborg. “No Genjis allowed.”

 

Genji shook his head and shrugged. “Fine fine, I won't intrude. You both go have your little secret club without me.” He punctuated the statement by shooing them off. “I'll tell Winston you will give your report later.”

 

“Much appreciated.” Jesse tipped his hat and turned to place a hand on Hanzo's shoulder to urge him on.

 

Once out of the docking bay and down the hall Hanzo looked over at his large companion. “You could have let him come.” he muttered.

 

“No, not really.” Jesse immediately answered, “I didn't want him to. This is mine and your time and as much as I enjoy hanging out with your little brother he's also annoying as shit.”

 

That got a rise out of Hanzo and he could not contain the deep laugh that erupted from him. “He is, isn't he?”

 

“Oh lord, you don't even know the half of it, Hanzo.” Sure the cowboy was probably playing it up for laughs, but his exaggerated sigh made Hanzo laugh harder. It was several moments before the archer was able to control himself. “It's good seeing you laugh again.”

 

The somber tone made Hanzo look over surprised, seeing how Jesse stared back at him. He wished the man wouldn't do that.

 

As if taking the hint the cowboy looked away. “Felt like we wouldn't be able to talk like this again after....well, ya know?”

 

“Hm.” After Hanzo so rudely rejected him. No rejected wasn't even it. He'd simply denied him anything and everything for his own selfish reasons. It was for the man's own good, but still. “I am sorry.”

 

“No, I said I wasn't gonna take a sorry from ya. You made yourself clear and I agreed to it. I also said I was gonna be mad at ya but that didn't exactly go well.” Jesse sighed. “A damn shame I like your company so damn much. Makes it hard to _stay_ mad at ya.”

 

A tiny bloom of happiness exploded in Hanzo's chest hearing that and he allowed a very small smile to form. “I greatly enjoy your company as well.”

 

“Well, that's a good thing cause it'd feel real awkward if you found me annoying after I just called your brother that.”

 

Another deep chuckle slipped passed Hanzo's lips. “I didn't say you weren't annoying. I just don't mind it.”

 

“Did..did you just insult me and compliment me at the same time?”

 

“It's a skill.” Hanzo shrugged nonchalantly before letting a wide grin creep over his lips as he glanced at Jesse.

 

“Jerk.”

 

“Pest.”

 

“You're breakin' my heart here, Hanzo.”

 

“I'll be breaking your pride soon once I beat you in the practice range.” That haughty response made them both laugh and Hanzo could see the competitive spark in Jesse's eyes as they hurried off.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

“I will need to have a smaller and less conspicuous group to go to Oasis, Iraq and meet with a Miss Satya Vaswani.” Winston put up an image of a dark skinned woman with sharp, clever eyes and a stern expression.

 

Hanzo glanced over the file in front of them. She was one of Vishkar's most skilled Architects and had been groomed by them from a young age. It sat ill with him to imagine Vishkar 'rooming' young minds to use as they please. While he himself was not ignorant to such a life seeing as his own upbringing was much the same there was something more foul in how Vishkar did it. Masquerading as a company who desired to do good in the world while hiding dark secrets. Perhaps this all hit too close to home.

 

“A week ago I was contacted by Miss Vaswani regarding some disturbing information she uncovered inside Vishkar. While she does not seem convinced the entire corporation is involved she does feel that certain higher members may have dealings with Talon.” Winston changed the screen to show the Vishkar logo.

 

“Vishkar is full of greedy snakes. They try and come in with their lies when they really want to enslave people and control our emotions.” Lucio was the first to pipe up, the usual calm DJ showing a fire behind his eyes.

 

“Yeah, not quite sure it's just a select few. I'm thinkin' the whole damn group is dirty save for some lower members. Any company who preaches about perfection and peace like they do it bound to be more about controlling folks rather than making anything better. That ain't ideal, it's a dictatorship.” Jesse huffed, kicking his feet up on the meeting table.

 

“Agent McCree, if you would be so kind as to remove your feet from the furniture. The meeting table is not a place for them.” Athena chimed overhead.

 

Embarrassed, Jesse quickly slipped his feet down and muttered an apology with a small hat tip to the AI.

 

Hanzo chuckle softly beside him, earning a sheepish smirk from the cowboy.

 

“A-anyways, I would like to send Doctor Ziegler, Hanzo, Zenyatta, and Mei to Oasis along with Torbjorn, and, very discreetly, Bastion.” Winston continued. “I want you all to enter Oasis as scientists. Both Doctor Ziegler and Mei will be a perfect cover while Zenyatta and Hanzo will act as their assistants.” Adjusting his glasses the gorilla looked at Torbjorn. “I would greatly appreciate it if Bastion was not seen at all. I know you need to meet your your contact to get parts for him but if he were seen it could cause a panic.”

 

“It'll be fine, Winston. You get too worked up over little details. I'll leave the tender omnic at the carrier if it's too much worry but I'll need to fit his parts in right away to make sure they'll even work. His model isn't exactly in mass production anymore. At least not the legal kind.” The dwarf laughed a bit as he spoke that last line.

 

Next to them Bastion gave a series of beeps and boops that made Zenyatta chuckle softly.

 

“You think you're being smart with me, but we'll see how much you joke when you're falling apart and I won't fix ya.” Torbjorn gave the omnic a side eye and Bastion drooped and let out a sad beep.

 

The omnic was definitely cause for concern at the beginning but it became clear that Bastion was a very curious and innocent being. It was discovered that he had defied his objective coding and overwritten it, resulting in a peaceful robot that simply wished to take in everything around it and converse with the tiny bird, Ganymede, that accompanied him.

 

It was an odd group, at least the ones sent to pose as scientists seeing as the other two were there on another mission, but it also seemed to make the most sense. A level of secrecy was needed along with a proper cover. He wasn't entirely sure how comfortable he felt being with both Doctor Ziegler and Zenyatta. As the meeting continued they received any other particulars and the agents on assignment were given supplementary files.

 

Lucio did protest not going but once Winston mentioned that the international DJ was pretty well known it was deemed unsafe. Vishkar also knew the young man's face and were not pleased with the DJ's theft of their technology. For now they had to play things safe and Lucio was still new to how they ran things. An organized former military peace force was not the same as resistance fighters.

 

They were scheduled to leave that evening so Hanzo went to pack his things. It would only be for two days supposedly but anything could happen so he packed for a few extra days in case. As he was finishing up he heard a knock on the door. That was strange. He had spoken briefly with Genji earlier though his brother did act as though he wanted to say more than just good luck.

 

Going to the door he was surprised to see Jesse standing there. Though it wasn't simply the appearance of the man but, “Your hair.”

 

“Ya like? Thought I needed a bit of cleaning up. Had Angie do it.” He ran his fingers through his hair, the cut much shorter and cleaner and his beard appeared to be trimmed up as well.

 

Hanzo was at a bit of a loss. He actually liked the very rough and rugged look of the man even back when they first met, but seeing him “cleaned up” as it were was a nice change. “It suits you.” He said with a small smile.

 

“Thanks.” It was a strange awkwardness that settled around them but not necessarily bad. Jesse's smile was sheepish as he rubbed the back of his neck, looking past Hanzo into his room. “Ya packin'?”

 

“Yes, we leave shortly and I d not wish to be the reason for our lateness.”

 

“Yeah, guess that makes sense. I actually...uh...”

 

Hanzo's brows rose curiously, seeing how the cowboy fidgeted.

 

“Just wanted to tell ya to be careful is all. Something about this whole thing feels a bit funny and...”

 

The hesitation in the man's words put up Hanzo's guard. “And?”

 

“And I heard some stuff about Oasis and that maybe some old acquaintance is there. Just be careful and don't trust no one, not even this Satya lady. I just feel like this is a little too convenient.” There was something antsy in the way the man was acting.

 

“This old acquaintance of yours, are they dangerous?” He questioned, feeling his defenses going up more. Jesse usually wasn't the type to needlessly worry so he assumed this was due to the man having a genuine worry over what he knew.

 

“Yeah, real dangerous and real sneaky. Puts on a smile but something about 'em just gets under your skin. You'll know 'em when you meet 'em.” The fact Jesse wasn't elaborating was unnerving but Hanzo did not press more. Perhaps it was because the cowboy hoped he was wrong.

 

“I will be mindful.” He assured him, going to finish zipping up his bag.

 

“Good. I just...I wanted to just come by and wish ya luck and all and give the warning.” Again with the odd actions.

 

“Was there something else?”

 

Now the cowboy's face screwed up tightly as if he was struggling with something. “When you get back I...I was wondering if we could have a talk?”

 

That set off alarm bells in Hanzo's mind, the way Jesse looked at him hopeful and nervous. The idea of what the man wanted to talk about feeling too clear. “Jesse, we already-”

 

“I know. I know what ya said and I know I said I'd accept it but,” He chewed on his lip, his brows furrowed as he considered his words, “I just wanna talk, Hanzo. I...I wanna talk when we ain't all twisted up and hurt and angry. Can we do that?”

 

It was strangely logical but also very dangerous. He feared given Jesse's persuasive nature his resolve would be swayed. “Very well.” He muttered, knowing it was stupid but a part of him wished to speak with the man honestly even if the outcome would not be what the other hoped. “I will think on it.”

 

The hopeful look deflated as soon as Hanzo added that last part and Jesse huffed. “Yeah, alright. You think about it and let me know, yeah? And in the meantime just watch yourself on the mission. Hate to hear something happened to ya.”

 

“It is the nature of our work.”

 

“I know but that don't mean I want something bad to happen to ya. I know we're a bit of a mess and things can get awkward but I just...I really would be awful put out if you up and got yourself hurt or worse. So don't, alright?” He gave a lopsided smile and Hanzo couldn't bring himself to argue it further.

 

“Very well.”

 

 

________________________________

 

 

That evening they were all on a flight to Iraq. Hanzo went over the files one more time, feeling a sense of unease not just over the warning Jesse gave him but the talk they may have. The idea of them sitting down and truly talking everything over made it hard to come up with excuses. What if Jesse broke his resolve, his will even further?

 

The most frightening part was wishing the man would. He hated this. Hated thinking and agonizing over it. He hated that he made Jesse look at him in that kicked puppy way when he rejected everything. If only he wasn't who he was. If only he had chosen different when it came to Genji and his family. If only Hanzo were a better man deserving of that gentle cowboy.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder who Jesse is referring to? Hmmmmmmm.
> 
> Anyways so Hanzo is on a mission with Zen so maybe just maybe they might get a chance to talk?
> 
> See you guys next chapter. I should have one up tomorrow or Tuesday and maybe fit in a couple more before the Sunday mandatory update.
> 
> Thanks again for the comments and kudos. They're so kind and I'm so glad so many of you are enjoying this story.


	10. Harmony and Discord

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On a mission to Oasis Hanzo finds himself questioning many things. With not much time to focus on those questions he focuses on the mission that seems to go by uneventfully. Unfortunately nothing has ever seemed to truly be uneventful with Overwatch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry this is later than I hopes for. My friend decided to beta read for me so he was looking everything over before I posted it. Hopefully I can go back and adjust the other chapters and their little mistakes at a later time. 
> 
> This chapter was super fun and I was so excited to write for two characters that showed up this chapter. I hope you all enjoy it.
> 
> Next chapter looks like it will be Sunday unless I can get a burst of energy. Work is so draining.
> 
> Anyways enjoy.

It was hot.

 

That was all he could think as he sat at the window of their hotel room, waiting for correspondence from Satya Vaswani. He hated when it was so warm since it made him feel lethargic. Of course he wouldn't let it dull his senses but the desire to not move was strong. They still had some time before their meeting with Satya Vaswani and he felt confined in the clothes he was wearing. He hardly felt he could be considered an assistant especially to Doctor Ziegler who, despite being around his age, looked ten years younger. Yet there was no way he could pose as a colleague seeing as if asked a question about medicine he wouldn't be sufficient enough to fake it. With luck no one would confront them at all except Miss Vaswani.

 

Torbjorn had gone ahead while Bastion waited at the carrier, hidden away. They had hopes he would not get distracted and wander off. There was a chance he might but Torbjorn had given the omnic a stern talking to that Hanzo had found oddly amusing. It was as if the small man was trying to teach a child, which was odd given Bastion was as large as Reinhardt.

 

He heard Mei come into the room and turned. “I'm so nervous. Oasis is supposed to be the city where many of the greatest minds gather. If only I had time to really speak with the other climatologists about the data I have.” She seemed saddened by this.

 

“The mission should come first.” He murmured, slipping out of the window. “Is the data so important?”

 

“Yes, it could drastically change how we manage climate change and create a more stable environment but unfortunately I have not been able to reach many of my former contacts since I've been out of the cryopod. Just getting to the Overwatch base was difficult.” Yet here she was, spurned on by sheer perseverance and optimism.

 

“Perhaps once we settle things we can find time to come back so you may get your research to those who can put it to use.” It was just an offhand comment to placate her but he found he was doing it with everyone more and more lately. He normally had never worried about soothing needless worries but he caught himself doing it many times to the other members. He was sure it sounded awkward coming from him but it seemed to help.

 

His comment to Mei was successful this time as she took on a hopeful expression and nodded. “Yes, I cannot give up yet. For now we must focus on the mission.”

 

“Are you all ready? We must hurry to the Vishkar Architect building soon.” Angela Ziegler was dressed in a elegant suit with her doctor's coat on. She had an even more stern expression and Hanzo realized he would most likely not need to talk much if she was leading them.

 

Moving through the city Hanzo glanced at Zenyatta who had been extremely quiet the entire trip as if in contemplation. The omnic was a curiosity to him but also he was wary of his presence. This being had somehow calmed his brother who had been full of anger and bitterness. What had the monk done to reign in his brother's recklessness that Hanzo himself could not?

 

“Your mind is swirling with questions.” The monk said without turning, simply floating alongside them.

 

Hanzo frowned, glaring ahead. “You assume much.”

 

“If I am wrong I apologize. You simply had a similar expression that your brother had when he had too much to ask but not sure which question to begin with.”

 

The comment caught Hanzo off guard. Zenyatta had seen Genji's face? Fool, of course he had. Genji spoke of the monk fondly and with reverence. Of course they spoke face to face. The entire thing twisted him up so much he almost missed how the monk alluded to him and Genji having a similar expression. “We are nothing alike.” He huffed, feeling his defenses raise.

 

“On the contrary, you are both very much alike. Perhaps so much you cannot help the fact you butt heads.”He spoke so calmly yet so to the point. “However, Genji eventually learned how to look passed his pride, most of the time. The skill still can be difficult for him. In a similar sense you are also bound by something, Hanzo.”

 

“You know nothing.” He hissed, trying to keep his voice down so as not to draw attention.

 

“There is no shame in admitting your shortcomings. It is what makes you so true and beautifully human.” Finally Zenyatta turned to him, the expressionless face giving away nothing. “It is something I envy among your kind. While we share many things I find there is something admirable in your passions and strong emotions. I would greatly wish to see them not shackle you but be used as a positive harmony within your soul.”

 

The words made him hesitate, thinking of his guilt, shame and self-depreciation being positive. He laughed. “Unlikely. I am not worth the effort. I am not like my brother.”

 

“You may look down upon yourself but there are those who see value in your existence. No, perhaps it is more you are a necessity to them.” Holding out his hand one of the orbs levitated over Zenyatta's palm, giving off a warm yellow glow. “Harmony can be found within the most chaotic soul if there is a proper catalyst.”

 

Hanzo watched the orb, his mind wandering and the image of Jesse's smile filled his head before he shook it away. His chest went tight, the idea of harmony being something he could experience. Yet, so many times he found a peace in the cowboy's presence. Was that what harmony was?

 

“We are here.” Doctor Ziegler turned to them, making sure they were all in character as they entered the building.

 

They all put on a professional face and followed her in, speaking with a woman at the front desk before being told to wait off in a side area.

 

“This place is so extravagant.” Mei said, looking around in wonder. “Oh I wish we had time to look around more.”

 

“It is a very interesting place. Some of the greatest and innovative minds are here.” Angela murmured, her gaze looking far off.

 

“Doctor Angela Ziegler?” A delicate voice called out, the tone laced with a harmonious flow. Standing before them was the woman from the photograph, Satya Vaswani. “I have been expecting you. I am Satya Vaswani, senior architect of Vishkar. This way, please. It is far too busy out here to speak.” Her expression went a bit stiff as a loud group walked behind her, excitedly discussing something that Hanzo could not fathom.

 

“Yes, of course. Thank you so much for seeing us.” Angela put on a smile and proceeded to fall into step beside the woman, lead back toward the many private offices.

 

Once inside Satya quickly shut and locked the door before raising a finger to her lips and moving to her computer. Clicking a few things she finally looked back at them. “We have a limited time to talk. I called you here because I need you to look into something. I am...limited within the company to certain aspects of the business. However I have uncovered some disturbing things that have me...uneasy.” She seemed to struggle for the right words as if she was rattled by the mere idea of the serene peace Vishkar seemed to radiate being shattered.

 

“What is it exactly that you found?” Angela asked, coming closer, keeping her demeanor calm. “If we know where to start looking we hopefully can get you your answers.”

 

“Of course.” Carefully Satya unlocked a drawer and handed a file to Angela. “There have been odd correspondences taking place though that is due to my eye catching something on a screen here or there, and many development sites the company has sought seem to follow unfortunate events. At first I believed it was merely the chaos of the area and we at Vishkar seek to bring harmony to the world. Naturally we would come in to help rebuild and create structure.”

 

“Except?” Hanzo's brows raised, trying to coax the information from her faster.

 

Satya looked at him and her eyes went sharp again. “Except rumors of this rogue organization Talon always seemed to be on the lips of the locals wherever we went. Almost as if the chaos was caused by them.”

 

“And Vishkar reaped the benefits of being the saviors.” Hanzo supplied, sighing. “A convenient turn of events.”

 

“It is appalling to think of.” The woman's voice seemed both offended and saddened though her stern face didn't show it much. “I did not wish to believe it at first and thought it a spark of paranoia and pushed it from my mind, but it keeps repeating itself so much that it cannot be mere coincidence.” She was not stupid and seemed to not let personal emotions veil her from the reality of the situation.

 

Hanzo found her admirable but as to how she uncovered this information was still unclear. Why now?

 

“Back to the issue at hand I wish to find out who is connected to Talon. I cannot believe the company itself is tied to them. It must be someone who seeks to further their fortune for selfish reasons. Such a person has no place at Vishkar.” Her mouth tensed into a thin line and she looked at all of them.

 

“We will look into it. Thank you for this information, Miss Vaswani. We will be in contact should we find anything.” Angela smiled again, taking the file and placing it within her small bag she brought.

 

“It would be greatly appreciated.” Nodding, Satya went to the door and unlocked it, urging them out. “Thank you for coming.”

 

“A pleasure. Thank you for contacting us.” Excusing herself, Doctor Ziegler left the room, followed by the others who all gave a polite nod to Satya.

 

Once outside the building Angela sighed. “This is complicated.”

 

“It cannot be just one person. As much as she wishes it were not the company as a whole, I doubt the CEO or board of directors would be ignorant to their recent good fortune.” Hanzo was quick to dash Satya's hopes once outside her presence.

 

“I don't like the idea of them simply going along with it but people can be very cruel and vicious when money is involved.” Mei agreed, frowning as she stared back up at the building.

 

“Regardless, we will need to get this information back to base. Torbjorn sent a message not long ago saying he can't get all the parts till tomorrow so we will be staying the night.”Angela reached up to brush her bangs from her face and fan herself, the heat clearly getting to them all.

 

“Well well, it is quite a surprise to see you here, Angela.” A deep and velvety voice called but it seemed to make the blond woman tense as she turned. Standing not far away in an elaborate outfit in the Oasis style that was common here was a tall, thin woman with striking red hair and heterochromatic eyes. She was smiling in a way that immediately unsettled Hanzo.

 

“Doctor O'Deorain.” Angela's face was more tense than Hanzo had ever seen. He wasn't even sure she had given _him_ such an expression. “It has been a long time.”

 

“Indeed it has. Are you still prattling away patching up wounded bodies wherever you can?” There was nothing kind in her words. “It is such a waste of your skills. Your mind would better serve the research we conduct here.”

 

“I am perfectly happy doing what I can to help others.” Putting on a smile, Angela gripped the bag in her hand tighter.

 

“A shame.” One brownish red and one blue eye glanced over to the rest of them as she gave them all a look that made Hanzo feel as if she were evaluating him. As if she were studying him in a cold and clinical way. Her eyes eventually fell to Zenyatta and she smiled wider. “Ah, I have not met a omnic of your kind in some time. A shambali monk is a rare thing even in Oasis.”

 

“I am broadening my horizons with my companions. I find you cannot truly teach peace and tranquility without exploring all aspects of the world.” Seemingly unfazed, Zenyatta nodded to her cordially.

 

“Fascinating.” Her eyes lit up. “I must know how your technology functions.” Cold. Calculating. She saw him as a toy to pick apart and see how he worked.

 

“Existence is mysterious, isn't it?” He said it in the same tone as always but there was just a tiny bit of attitude in it and it surprised Hanzo so much he had to cough to hide a chuckle, especially seeing the woman's face tighten up.

 

“We must be going. It was nice to see you again, Doctor.” Angela quickly urged them on, ending any further conversation.

 

As they left Hanzo watched the woman stare at them, something about her making him feel ill and uneasy.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Satya felt a headache coming on. She was not good with dealing with so many people and she was still questioning her decision to call them. Was this still careless or should she put her faith in their discretion? Checking her emails she saw one from a contact she did not recognize. Had it not been for the subject line she would have deleted it immediately and then questioned their Tech department about their spam filters and security.

 

**[FW:** _**Someone's Been Naughty]** _

 

Frowning she clicked on the email, an image filling the screen.

 

“No....this cannot be true.”

 

 

________________________________

 

 

He sat back on his bed, trying to let the sour mood still around him dissipate. That doctor was truly an unsettling woman. She was the exact opposite of what Doctor Ziegler was. He heard the communicator on the bedside table chime and opened his eyes, sitting up to look at who was calling. The name that flashed on the screen made him smile automatically before his lips pursed in confusion.

 

“This is Hanzo.”

 

“Hey, Hanzo, it's McCree...er Jesse, uh...sorry to be calling so late. It's late there, right?” That smooth voice called through the line.

 

Hanzo found himself smiling again and held the communicator to his ear. “No, it is barely past dinner.” It was hard to ignore the tension and warmth in his chest. “Was there a reason you called?”

 

“Huh? Oh yeah, well it's probably not anything to worry about seeing as you all are coming back tomorrow, but I looked into that person I thought was there at Oasis. Turns out she is. Even going by her own damn name, which is strange cause I had thought her reputation left a lot to be desired. Even by my standards.” Jesse was almost rambling except his words made Hanzo tense. “Anyways just wanted to give ya a heads up just in case. Her name is Moira O'Deorain. Some kinda geneticist if I recall.”

 

That tension was back ten-fold at hearing that. “We met Doctor O'Deorain today actually.” Hanzo said curtly, his skin crawling thinking about her.

 

“Oh shit. Are you serious?” Jesse paused as if trying to take this all in. “Damn, so she _is_ there. Damn snake. I never liked her and things only got real bad after she showed up. Gabe was acting weird, other members of Blackwatch started being extra secretive.”

 

“I can say that she was very unpleasant. I have never felt more like a rat ready to be experimented on then when I was standing before her.” Those eyes had been unsettling watching them leave.

 

“Yeah, she's always been like that. Always thought hiring her was a mistake but Gabe was all about it cause of her skills. Not sure what he'd been thinking but honestly she coulda had the cure to every genetic disease and I wouldn't want her within a thousand miles of me.” There was a flicking of a lighter on the other end and Hanzo knew he was smoking. “Good thing you're coming home tomorrow. I don't like the thought of her being near you either.”

 

The idea of the man referring to the base as home, not just Overwatch but Hanzo's home, gave him a tiny twinge in his chest. “Jesse, you are being over-dramatic. There is no reason to worry over the doctor. We will be gone and never need to worry about her again.”

 

“You say that but I just got a gut feelin' about this.” The cowboy's voice grew soft. “And I worry 'bout you regardless. Can't help that.”

 

“I thought you'd said we'd talk about this when I was ready.” Hanzo huffed, leaning back on the pillows.

 

“Yeah, but worrying about you ain't exclusive to other things.” A puff of air rushed passed the receiver as the man exhaled smoke. “Neither is missing you being here.”

 

He trembled, his breath growing heavy as his throat tightened. Hanzo closed his eyes, willing his control to stay in place.

 

“You miss me a bit too when I'm gone, doncha?”

 

“Jesse, I-” before he could answer their was a chime from the communicator and he saw there was another call coming in. It was not a number he had in the contacts on this but if it was coming through it must be an Overwatch agent. Perhaps Winston on another line? “Just a moment, there is another call.” He fiddled with the buttons and clicked the line over.

 

Before Hanzo could speak a distorted voice came through.

 

“Looks like the little bird in the ivory tower just stumbled on a secret.” There was a very distorted laugh before the voice continued. “Better hurry before the hawk's talons get a hold of her.”

 

Hanzo frowned, calling out as the line went dead. What the hell was that? Who was that? He had questions but the warning had his mind struggling to piece it together. Bird in the ivory tower? A secret? Talon.

 

“Hanzo, ya there?” Jesse's voice was coming through again, confused at his silence.

 

“I have to go. She's in danger.” He hung up the call before the cowboy could ask why and raced from the room.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Moments later they were racing back to the Vishkar building, the sun having long ago set and the streets far emptier than before. Hanzo had barely been able to explain most of it and hadn't been able to elaborate on the strange phone call he received. He felt it was not the most important thing right now given a woman's life was in danger.

 

Reaching the building they found the front doors locked and the only access being a possible unlocked window higher up. Torbjorn thought he might be able to find a way passed the doors by taking some things apart and Mei was attempting to bypass the security panel but it would take too long. “I am going to see if I can find a way inside above.”

 

“What? Hanzo, that is dangerous.” Doctor Ziegler said as she watched the man walk along the side of the building.

 

“We do not have time. If one of us can make it in perhaps I can extract Satya Vaswani before Talon reaches her.” He adjusted Stormbow on his shoulder and started to climb, scaling the building quickly. He had to go up a few stories before finding an open door off a balcony. Entering the building he quickly moved toward the stairs, needing to go to the ground floor. Hopefully Satya was still in her office otherwise this entire things was pointless. He had no idea where the woman lived in Oasis.

 

The halls were quiet and he wondered if it was typical for all employees to leave by a certain time. It seemed in line with how Vishkar ran things. It was almost eerily quiet, like a trap.

 

Reaching the ground floor he tried to follow the signs along the hallways back toward the lobby enough that he could find her office. It was not easy and while the dull blue glow of the hall lights were easy on the eyes it played with the shadows in the area. No, it was not merely the shadows but the entire feel of the building. Something was wrong.

 

It was practically luck that he stumbled upon her office, reaching to try and open it and finding it unlocked. “Miss Vaswani?” He called to her, jumping back before a small laser could hit him.

 

“Stay back!” She called, raising a weapon toward him.

 

“I am with Overwatch. I received a call that you were in danger.” He wondered if she had already been attacked.

 

Satya's brows tensed and she slowly came closer. “Yes, I was unable to leave so I fortified the room. Is she still out there?”

 

“She?” Hanzo blinked, confused.

 

“You are making this harder than it needs to be, Miss Vaswani.” That deep and eloquent voice called from Hanzo's side, making him turn to see the Doctor from earlier. She was smiling though her expression left him feeling ill and cold. “If you had simply done your job we would not have had to come to this.” Shifting her fingers she opened her palm, displaying a glowing orb violet in color. It reminded Hanzo of Zenyatta's orbs he always had with him. “It is not my preference to see to matters personally, but I will see them done.” Flicking her wrist the orb raced toward them.

 

“I will shield us.” Satya was at Hanzo's side instantly and moving her prosthetic hand she projected a barrier that flew back toward Moira. However the orb simply passed through, tendrils snaking out to grab onto them both.

 

It was the strangest and most unsettling feeling. Hanzo fell to his knees, feeling as if his very strength was being drained from him. He tried to lift his bow but as he raised it he watched the doctor flick her hand and that same purple tendril flow from her fingers and latched onto him. “What...foul power is this?” He hissed.

 

“The power of my will.” Moira called, laughing deeply. “It is a shame I have to kill you Shimada, Akande seemed to think you had potential, but I will not suffer my prey escaping.

 

Hanzo looked over to Satya who seemed in shock at what was happening. If only he could move enough to escape. He had not been prepared for something like this.

 

Moira stepped closer, the clack of her boots on the tile floor all Hanzo could hear for a moment. The situation had taken a dark turn and all he could think of was Jesse's voice telling him to be careful.

 

That would have been his last thought if not for the blinding light that surrounded them all. The cold and draining feeling left him and instead warmth and peace seemed to fill his mind.

 

Beside them was Zenyatta, the light emanating from his very being and the appearance of several golden transparent arms fanning out behind him. “I am sorry, but I cannot allow you to harm them.” The omnic called and he glanced down at Hanzo. “We must move quickly.”

 

With his strength renewed Hanzo nodded and reached out to help Satya to her feet as they ran passed the momentarily blinded Doctor Moira O'Deorain, and to their companions who had made it into the lobby. From there it was a made dash back to their transport, knowing they could not stay now. Hanzo filed away the fact that the doctor seemed to be working for Talon, knowing he'd need to bring it up not just with Jesse but the entire team.

 

Within the hour they were taking off, the parts Torbjorn couldn't secure for Bastion having to wait for now. They could not afford to stay anymore. It seemed that Talon was no longer willing to sit and let them interfere and were now actively trying to stop them from uncovering the greater truth.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Moira was so much fun to write. I have been excited for this part and I also had a blast with Zenyatta as well. I gotta have my fave omnic monk have a badass scene after all.
> 
> Thank you as always for your comments and kudos. I will try and bring you another awesome chapter on Sunday or sooner.
> 
> See you all next chapter. I am now going to go pass out. lol


	11. Brothers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group returns after a close run in with Doctor Moira O'Deorain and Hanzo is met with concern from his brother and Jesse McCree. With more information about Talon in their data bank the new Overwatch decides how best to proceed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sunday update! I'm sorry this is so late in the day but me and my new Beta Reader were going over this chapter cause so much important stuff happen.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy. I know many of you were waiting for this particular talk and look forward to things getting more intense and chaotic.

He'd been on edge for hours and when the transport finally arrived back he was rushing over, his heart racing. He'd tried calling Hanzo back so many times and then Winston had let them know what had happened. The only thing that had stopped him from rushing to Hanzo was the fact that Angela was adamant about getting both him and Satya Vaswani checked out. It made it hard to get close and Hanzo looked oddly pale which didn't sit right with him. He was worried and wanted to talk to him, especially after hearing they ran into Moira. That damn woman was the devil.

 

“I need to look you both over right away. Zenyatta was able to counter the effects of Moira's power, but I do not know if there are other side effects involved.” Angela was urging them passed everyone toward the infirmary.

 

Hanzo nodded but he glanced over at Jesse and nodded his head slightly.

 

He could only nod back, the worry clear on his face. He noticed Genji hurrying to Zen and decided he wouldn't bombard the monk with questions right now so he followed the others to the infirmary.

 

Hovering outside, Jesse paced. This was taking longer than a usual checkup, right? Was Hanzo alright? It felt like forever when the door opened and Angela stared at him in that way she did when he'd messed up his arm after Hanzo's patch job.

 

“You can come in now.” She said quickly then turned. “Miss Vaswani, I will help you get settled in a room for the time being. I am sure Winston will like to speak with you but I suggest rest for the day.”

 

“Thank you.” Satya Vaswani came out of the room, looking a little worn down but overall well. She followed Angela down the hall, glancing at McCree curiously for a moment.

 

Once they were gone Jesse hurried into the room, seeing Hanzo getting off the exam table and slipping his shirt back on. “You doin' alright?”

 

The archer paused and looked at him, offering a small, weak smile. “Yes, at least according to the doctor. I had felt...wrong the entire trip back.” He was shifting awkwardly, his face showing clear discomfort.

 

He knew that he should give him space but he'd been so worried since he'd heard he couldn't stop himself and went to the man, pulling him into his arms. “I'm just glad you're safe, Darlin'.”

 

“Jesse?” Hanzo's voice seemed startled but the man didn't pull away.

 

So the cowboy just held him a little tighter, pressing his face into the scruffy shaved side of Hanzo's head. “I kept telling myself you'd be fine and could handle it but...I just got real scared there for a bit.”

 

Hanzo's body seemed to relax and then he was leaning into Jesse. “Everything was fine. You worry over nothing.”

 

“'S not nothin'.” He insisted and pulled back, his hand moving to cup Hanzo's jaw. This was dangerous territory. He knew that. He knew they'd put this off but he couldn't stop himself.

 

The other man's face twisted in confliction and his dark eyes glanced away. “You said we'd talk about this-”

 

“I know but...just for a bit.” Maybe it was unfair, but he'd never been one to play fair. Leaning in he brought his lips to the man's forehead, leaving his lips on the man's warm skin. “Just a little bit.”

 

The smaller man said nothing else, just leaning against him.

 

It was nice, just to hold him. He hadn't really gotten a chance. Either they were tangling themselves up in a chaotic mess or Hanzo was pushing him away in the least convincing way. Jesse knew they were probably going to have awkwardness again and Hanzo would give him some excuse but for now he just enjoyed this rare moment.

 

“Sorry to interrupt.” Genji's voice called from the door.

 

Hanzo went rigged and pulled back quickly, staring at the ground before turning to Genji.

 

Jesse tried to not take that badly, but it stung a bit. He slid his hat off and raked his fingers through his hair. If he was unsure if part of Hanzo's hang up had to do with Genji he was damn sure now. What the hell was with that guilty look on the man's face?

 

“Are you alright, brother?” The cyborg walked over, concern lacing his voice.

 

“I am fine. You both worry too much. We completed the mission despite the complications and no one was gravely injured.” A hard expression crossed Hanzo's face as if he was putting up walls again.

 

“Yes but Moi...Doctor O'Deorain is dangerous. I remember her from Blackwatch. She had always left me feeling uneasy. I recall the day she asked if I sought upgrades for my cybernetics but I refused. Something about the way she spoke made me feel as if I would regret such a thing.”

 

“Didn't stop Gabe.” Jesse muttered, frowning as he remembered how their former boss had gone to see the “good” Doctor frequently. It wasn't long after Gabe started acting weird and hisreflexes in battle started to seem off.

 

Genji seemed to respond to the comment and sighed. “I am just glad you are alright, Brother. When Jesse told me that she was there and you had met her I felt uneasy. There is no telling what she is capable of.”

 

“She had a strange...ability but your master saved us. I...will need to thank him.” Again Hanzo's face twisted as if he was conflicted. “But that will need to wait. I have been ordered to get some rest from Doctor Ziegler and I am in agreement.”

 

“Then we will not bother you.” Genji stepped aside for him.

 

Jesse kept fiddling with his hat. “Yeah, get some rest, Dar...Hanzo.” Biting his lip he turned away, struggling to hold down what had been threatening to burst out until Genji arrived. It was for the best. They didn't need another mess like back in Korea.

 

Hanzo gave a faint nod, walking passed both of them out of the infirmary.

 

“I do not like that she is working with Talon.” Genji said once his brother had left.

 

“Me neither.” Taking out a cigar he chewed on it, debating a moment. “Ya know that Reaper guy we keep hearing about?”

 

“The one you encountered in Korea?” The cyborg looked over.

 

“Yeah.” His throat felt tight as he tried to build up to saying the words. “I think....I think it's Gabe.”

 

“Commander Reyes?”

 

“Yeah. Back when I chased Hanzo to go assist we got into a bit of a mess. The Reaper showed up and he just....he said things that just sounded so much like him. Talked to me like he knew me.” It still was unnerving. True there had never been a body but given the state of the base it was sure that Gabe and Jack had died in the explosion. Was it possible Gabe hadn't died? “Ya think....ya think Moira did something to him? Back when she first joined Gabe saw her a lot and started acting weird. You think she like, messed with his DNA or somethin'”

 

“It is possible. She asked me many times to undergo enhancements or to conduct tests. I did not wish anyone to touch me save for Doctor Ziegler.” Genji's voice went a bit soft at the end.

 

“Yeah, I know you were pretty touchy about who messed with your body back then. Angie had to supervise any tech that had to adjust your systems and all.” He remembered one tech guy got a bit to close and Genji about took his hand off. “But still I ain't a hundred percent certain but I'm pretty damn sure.” He'd talked with Winston about it and the gorilla said he'd look into it. Still there wasn't much to go on. As far as they all knew Gabriel Reyes died in the explosion that leveled the Swiss base along with Jack Morrison.

 

He parted from Genji shortly after, the air over them heavy. They had both been worried about Hanzo, and the fact Moira had shown her face again, and Gabe...Dammit. This was a mess. So many things to worry over and he was already struggling enough with one. He needed to talk to Hanzo, really talk, but if he forced it the archer might just pull way back again. Earlier had been nice though. It was probably taking advantage of things but he just needed it. He needed to feel he was okay. After the call cut out he'd been on edge, his imagination feeding him all sorts of unsettling images. Maybe they could sit down and talk once Hanzo felt better. He'd try and decide based on when he saw him again.

 

 

________________________________

 

 

Normally he was not the type to sleep a day away but he'd felt so strange he decided it may be for the best. He didn't want to be less than fine if they needed to go somewhere. So Hanzo went to his room and slept for a long while; waking in the very early morning before anyone would be up, groggy and with a headache but better than the prior day. Whatever that doctor had done it had left him with a lingering illness. It seemed to be gone and he was grateful Doctor Ziegler had been right in her assumption that sleep would help.

 

He got up and went to shower before heading to the mess hall and making some tea. Something to help him relax may dull the headache. As he entered the kitchen he was surprised to see Satya Vaswani there also drinking something warm from a mug. “How are you feeling?” He asked.

 

She looked up, a little guarded before offering a tense smile. “Much better. Thank you. I can assume you also feel less ill after resting?”

 

Hanzo nodded, going to make some tea. They had not spoken much on the trip back, both of them feeling weakened and ill. It had only been because of Zenyatta's bright aura that they somehow found enough strength to run. “Has Vishkar contacted you?”

 

She shook her head. “No, and all my access to the servers have been revoked. My password does not work in anything.” Her hands cupped the mug tighter. “While this does not entirely prove Vishkar's involvement I am left with thinking nothing else.” Satya's eyes looked sad as she stared at the steam rising from the mug. “I feel so foolish.”

 

That made Hanzo pause as he set the tea steeping, and he battled with the decision to say something or not. “You are not foolish. Naive perhaps, but foolishness stems more from doing something despite all warning. There was no reason to not believe the Vishkar Corporation until they attempted to eradicate you for discovering things they are ashamed of.” He turned. “There is nothing foolish in being taken advantage of. It is a reflection of the ones who took advantage.”

 

Her eyes widened a little before she smiled and closed her eyes, letting out a sigh. “That is kind of you to say. I feel I will still reprimand myself for it but there is a comfort in thinking such a thing.” There was a long quiet pause between them before she spoke again. “Mister Shimada, thank you for coming to my aid. I did not properly thank you before due to the chaos of the situation.”

 

Hanzo was picking up his tea cup, preparing to leave, when she spoke. “It was no trouble. I was merely the only one who could reach you in a timely manner. The entire team was looking out for your safety.”

 

“Yes, but an act of heroics is deserving of gratitude all the same. Please, accept my thanks.” She seemed amused by his denial of what he'd done.

 

He sighed and cleared his throat. “Very well. You are most welcome, Miss Vaswani.”

 

“Please, call me Satya.”

 

“Then please call me Hanzo. I am a Shimada only in name now.” He truly was no longer really a Shimada anymore, was he?

 

“As you wish, Hanzo.”

 

 

________________________________

 

 

That evening they all met to discuss the mission. Hanzo and the rest gave their account of what had happened, and there seemed to be a lot of worry over Moira O'Deorain being involved. Hanzo was able to learn more about her and her connection with Overwatch through Blackwatch.

 

The biggest issue was Satya showing what she'd received through an email moments before the doctor had attacked her. On display was a set of images. One of Sanjay Korpal meeting with a few men in suits, but the image of Doctor O'Deorain and the woman known as Widowmaker was seen in the background. Subsequent images showed several members of the board also meeting with Talon agents. If they needed any other proof that Vishkar was working with Talon or that Talon may be running the corporation this was it.

 

It was decided they would look into a few more leads and Winston and Athena would look into the mysterious person who had sent the email and made the call to Hanzo. His communicator wasn't much help since the number they used and the connection was encrypted. So they were left waiting.

 

As they all dispersed from the meeting Genji came up beside Hanzo. “Do you have plans after this?”

 

“No, I considered getting in some practice since I was unable to before.” He felt a bit stiff but perhaps extra rest wouldn't hurt. “Why?”

 

“I was hoping you may join me for some evening tea.” Genji seemed odd, pensive in how he was speaking though it was hard to tell.

 

Raising a brow Hanzo nodded. “I suppose that would be fine.” Things felt strange. Genji was acting strange but again it was hard to tell. Half the time he could not tell what his brother was thinking. Following his brother, Hanzo prepared himself for whatever may happen.

 

Ten minutes later they were sitting out above the training yard sipping tea and watching the last tendrils of light sink into the sea. “I am sorry.”

 

The words were so strange to hear suddenly and Hanzo looked over at Genji confused. “You're sorry?”

 

Nodding the cyborg looked down. “For hurting you. For turning my back on you when you needed me.”

 

Brows furrowing, Hanzo felt a strange constriction in his chest and swallowed hard. “That is...”

 

“Do not say it is nothing or that was not it. I may have allowed youthful indiscretion and ignorance to cloud my eyes before but I have spent much time reflecting upon myself. I know that my indifference to the family did not simply defy the Shimada clan's wishes but hurt you deeply.” The other's tone was as calm as always but there was just a hint of the old Genji in there.

 

However, there was still something bothering Hanzo. “Can you...please remove the mask?”

 

There was a long pause and then Genji reached up, unclasping the visor and slipping it off. The scarred remnants of his brother's face now visible. “Apologies. I forgot how you dislike when you cannot see someone's face.”

 

“It is simply hard to tell what you are thinking, or the meaning behind your words. I hear your voice but sometimes I question if it is my brother behind the mask.” To be so honest made him feel so exposed. “Now why these apologies? If I recall it is I who had done a great unkindness to you.”

 

“Yes, I will not deny you attempting to murder me was not something I ever hoped for. However, I also know that in the end I did little to give you reason to see me as a brother at the end.” The dark brown eyes that had been concealed from Hanzo for so long closed, his brows knitted together. “I am sorry I did not see what the burden of the Shimada was doing to you, aniki.”

 

The term made him smile, something he had not heard for a very long time. “Genji...” He felt the twinge within his heart, the old wound he'd carried for more than a decade. “I should have defied them when they asked me to put you down. I believed what I had done was my duty. I believed that you had already forsaken me as your brother.”

 

“I know. I was...cruel.” Genji turned his head, his eyes meeting his brother's. “We both walked a path of destruction neither of us could see the end of. We both made many mistakes but I want you to know that you do not need to carry the weight of it all, Hanzo.”

 

“You are too lenient in your words. I struck you down with my sword, Genji.” There was still no denying it.

 

“And I gave you every reason to believe that was the best option.” A vulnerability in Genji's eyes was now visible, without the visor, without the mask of indifference he once wore. “I refused to stand beside you and support you, and then I had the audacity to pull the brother card during our fight. Using it as a defense when I had not been worthy of it.”

 

Hanzo remembered. He remembered during the fight when it was clear Genji would not win, when his brother looked scared for the first time since the fight started. Genji had tried to ingratiate himself to Hanzo by saying they were brothers and they should stand together. In truth it had stayed his hand, made him hesitate. “Genji, you had never wanted to be involved with the family. I knew that and I still tried to pressure you into it.”

 

“That may be true but I also wished to still have your as my brother. I wish that now. That we may heal the scars of the past and stand together once more. I will stand beside you in the ways I failed to before.” Reaching over, Genji placed a hand on Hanzo's shoulder. “And what I wish more than anything is that you not be afraid to step forward and take hold of your new life.”

 

Hanzo felt there was a lot in that statement and stared back at the younger man for a long moment. “I am doing that. I have come here to assist and put my life to more use than being a mercenary.”

 

“That is not what I meant.”

 

“That is none of your business.”

 

“Maybe so but I still feel you should not limit yourself.”

 

“Genji.” He said it sternly, not wanting the conversation to shift _there_ yet. He was still struggling with it.

 

“Very well, but I am sorry about everything else. I just did not want you to take all the blame. I did not want to let myself be absolved of my own errors so easily. You overlooked much from me and still do. Even now you carry the burden of it all and still believe yourself unworthy.” The words were heartfelt. They were confident and steady in a way that Genji had never been in his youth. There had always been a flighty and carefree way in which he spoke and took responsibility, if he ever did.

 

Hanzo was not so sure he was truly worthy of the forgiveness or the life his brother insisted he take back. However, to have acknowledgment from his brother, to have old hurts be addressed did bring him a sense of peace.

 

“What do you imagine father would think if he saw us now?” Genji's question was sudden and when Hanzo looked up his brother was staring out at the now dark sea.

 

He thought a moment. “Hard to say who he'd be more disappointed in.” He smiled wryly, watching the ocean and thinking to himself, _“It is most likely me.”_

 

 

__________________________________

 

 

After the talk with Genji, Hanzo retreated to bed, his mind processing it all. It was strange to talk face to face but it had been appreciated, and hearing his brother admit their past failures so plainly and offer apology left him feeling as if some of the weight had been lifted.

 

_I wish more than anything is that you not be afraid to step forward and take hold of your new life._

 

Hanzo knew Genji had been referring to Jesse and how Hanzo tried to keep the cowboy at a distance. Try being the keyword. He had failed spectacularly in the infirmary. It had been impossible to push the cowboy away though. He was tired and the idea of soaking in the warmth of the man who brought his mind peace if only for a few moments had been too tempting. In truth he had sought his touch, his voice, and his tired body had felt that unease settle so he'd allowed the closeness. It was selfish. He only seemed to change how he wanted to handle their relationship every other day and was too weak to the other man's words. Why did Jesse care so much? Why had he looked so worried when he'd come back from the mission? There was no reason to worry over a man like him and yet if Jesse McCree ever stopped caring about him he was not sure he could take it.

 

He was a cruel and selfish man.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have I mentioned how much I love these brothers and want them to be happy? Cause I do. LET THEM BE HAPPY BLIZZARD!
> 
> Also poor Jesse and Hanzo, but Hanzo does it to himself. I'm breaking him down though. A lot is planned for next chapter so look forward to it.
> 
> Thank you again for all kudos and comments. As always they truly keep me going and I hope to continue to write a story you all enjoy.


	12. Breaking Point

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are starting to heal between the Shimada brothers. Hanzo unfortunately can't decide what to do about his and Jesse's relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY!
> 
> I hit a bit of a slump and then Monster Hunter World came out and I got lazy. There's no excuse. I just kinda fell off the wagon but I'm back.
> 
> And this time with a chapter for valentine's day that I hope you all enjoy. I want to thank my Beta Reader for kicking my ass to finish this tonight cause this chapter almost didn't happen. And I will be posting on Sunday once again. We've got about maybe 5 chapters before this story wraps up. So thank you so much for sticking around for the final third of this fic and sorry once again for the long hiatus.
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!

They'd been debating on their next move when the news came in. Attack on Numbani airport. Doomfist exhibit robbed. They'd heard about Akande Ogundimu's escape not long ago and it seemed he was not content to go without his gauntlet. Hanzo remembered hearing Moira mention him. The idea that they'd been keeping tabs on him was disturbing.

 

As much as it left them feeling uncertain a group was sent to try and gather any information they could. They were a full team, the idea that they may meet not only Doomfist but any other Talon members was possible. It was decided Reinhardt, Genji, McCree, D.Va, Lucio, and Zenyatta would go, the well rounded group hopefully making them able to work around anything.

 

Once again Hanzo watched as his brother and Jesse left, something in him feeling uneasy. He couldn't describe it. It was as if he sensed something was wrong. Doctor Ziegler insisted he be at base to monitor just in case so he was not eligible to go. He wished he could go.

 

It was near the evening after dinner when his communicator got a call and he stared at the screen before answering it. “Is there an issue?”

 

“Can't a fella just call?” Jesse's voice called from the other end.

 

“These should be used for Overwatch business.” Hanzo added.

 

“Yeah, and I need me some quality Hanzo time to be able to focus.” There was an amused tone to his voice. Something that made Hanzo smile despite knowing he should not be promoting this behavior.

 

“You are ridiculous.” Hanzo muttered, sitting on his bed. “Did you really call just to speak with me?”

 

“Yeah?” The other man seemed surprised Hanzo would even ask. “I like hearing your voice.” That sweet, warm tone grew deeper as if Jesse was holding the communicator even closer to his mouth. “Is that not allowed? I guess I never asked what was okay seeing as we haven't had a chance to talk.”

 

Ah yes, the talk. Something they honestly hadn't had a chance for. He knew they should sit down and discuss this though now he wasn't sure what to do. After his talk with Genji he'd been trying to decide what to do. “This is....acceptable.”

 

“Acceptable? You always sound so formal with me when you get uncomfortable.” The comment was far too truthful. “I can let ya go if you want, Hanzo.”

 

“No.” The words left his lips quickly and Hanzo found himself chewing his lip as if to reprimand himself and then thought better of it. “No, I wish to hear your voice.”

 

When no response came Hanzo actually started to wonder if he'd spoken wrong before he heard a deep sigh. “Dammit, that made me a lot happier to hear than I thought.” He sounded so odd but it was also strangely...cute?

 

It made Hanzo chuckle just a little as he closed his eyes. “You make too much out of nothing.”

 

“It ain't nothin'.” Jesse interjected quickly. “It ain't.”

 

They were treading dangerous ground. Hanzo was not ready for them to talk of this but if they continued they'd cross a line before he could protest. Did he want to protest?

 

“Alright, you going quiet is making me worried. Say somethin'.”

 

“Somethin'.” He tried to mimic the accent though it was not nearly as smooth as the cowboy.

 

“Smartass.”

 

Hanzo laughed and he could make out a deep chuckle on the other end.

 

“Just talk with me a bit. Tell me what's going on there. What did you have for dinner?” There was a faint sound of noise as if from the city and a brush of wind along the receiver. Jesse must be near a window.

 

“Why would that matter?” He questioned, trying to think of dinner all the same. Lena had cooked tonight though he wasn't sure salt could be considered much of a good spice like she insisted.

 

“Yeah it does. Just tell me stuff.”

 

“Very well.” He leaned back on his bed, recounting the meal and some of the boisterous conversations that had taken place before he'd escaped back to his room. Jesse was silent as he talked, only making a comment here or there and when the conversation lulled the cowboy would ask another mundane question. Hanzo obliged him despite voicing his confusion over the silly questions. He hadn't even realized he'd been drifting off until he heard a soft voice call to him.

 

“You're fallin' asleep, Darlin'.”

 

Hanzo jerked a bit, his eyes snapping open and glancing up at the ceiling. When had he stopped talking?

 

Another chuckle. “Get some rest. I'll see ya when we get back.”

 

“Jesse?” He spoke the man's name before he could stop himself.

 

“Hm?”

 

“Be careful.” He was tired and weak willed, that was why he was letting his mouth run. “And please...keep an eye on Genji.”

 

“Don't even gotta ask, Darlin'.” That bright and confident tone gave Hanzo a sense of peace to hear. “See ya soon. Goodnight.”

 

“Goodnight.”

 

 

__________________________________

 

 

Unfortunately the agents were in Numbani for several days with very little information to go off of. They'd been getting reports daily. The airport destruction, the museum break in. All of it seemed to be said and done with no trace of Talon or Doomfist. It was on the fourth day they were said they'd be coming back when something came up and other than a brief check in the were all left waiting. Hanzo did not like it. He had tried to call Jesse but there was no answer and he had to assume the man was busy. He had briefly thought of calling Genji but things still felt a little awkward between them. The talk had helped but it would still take time.

 

He had just got back from a run when Athena informed him Doctor Ziegler and Winston had tried to contact him. The transport with the agents was returning and there had been a complication. He didn't need any more information before he was running to the docking bay. Try as he might he could not stop the flurry of possible problems that could have arisen. What happened? Who got hurt? Was it Genji? Jesse? Both? Hanzo's heart was racing far too hard and it was not from running.

 

When he finally made it he saw Doctor Ziegler running to the transport ship as the doors opened. There seemed to be too much commotion for him to see but he feared getting too close. He saw Reinhardt shaking his head and speaking with the doctor as she rushed in and then he caught Hana moving out of the ship, seeing him.

 

“Hanzo!” She rushed over. “Oh my god, I'm so sorry. We didn't think we'd actually run into the big bad Doomfist. The Meka was cooling down after using the boosters and he was coming for me and-”

 

He was barely listening to her, looking around her to see a familiar hat. Jesse was coming out of the ship, a worried expression on his face.

 

“-and then Genji, he-” Hana kept going.

 

“What about Genji?” That seemed to snap Hanzo out of his trance, grabbing onto Hana's small shoulders. “What happened?”

 

“I was trying to tell you. He got between me and Doomfist and took the punch and hit a wall and...He wasn't moving.” Her eyes were welling up with tears even though she seemed to be struggling to hold them back. “It's my fault. I didn't realize...” She stopped when a large hand rested on her shoulder.

 

Reinhardt stood behind her. “It was no one's fault. We couldn't have known Doomfist would show himself. Everyone made it out thanks to your quick thinking.”

 

“It weren't the little lady's fault, Hanzo. It was mine. I should have been watching.” Jesse stood behind them, staring at Hanzo sheepishly. “I thought I saw somethin' and went to check on it alone and that's when the Talon agents jumped me. Hana and Genji came to assist and save my ass. That's when Doomfist arrived, about damn near undid us all but Hana was able to throw him off from hitting me with her Mek and left herself open. He was too fast for us to counter.”

 

“Genji was able to throw off Doomfist's attack but it threw him. It damaged some sort of mobility sensors but his life systems were intact.” It was the first time Reinhardt was soft spoken in a long time. He knew the tension was high, saw the fear and was trying to keep everyone from panicking.

 

Hanzo was trying to take it in, the need to bolt and find Genji, find out what was wrong was high. He jumped when he felt a firm hand on his shoulder and turned to see Jesse looking at him.

 

“He's alright. Just damaged some mobility stuff. Far as we could tell all life support systems were good and Angie is gonna doublecheck them first thing to be sure. He'll be alright, Darlin'.” The cowboy's smooth voice was soothing but it couldn't entirely erase the tension and fear in Hanzo and he knew it.

 

It was then he saw the doctor come out with a stretcher, the body of the cybernetic ninja sprawled out on it, the body of his brother. They sped by and Doctor Ziegler was speaking to him as if going through a checklist she memorized. Hanzo could only watch. He was in shock, frozen and it was only when he felt Jesse push on the small of his back that he remembered how his legs worked.

 

With the cowboy's assistance they followed Genji and the doctor to the medbay, anyone else's words of support lost on him.

 

 

__________________________________

 

 

They were not allowed in while Doctor Ziegler saw to Genji, however Hanzo could not sit, nor could he stay still. So he paced. He paced in front of the door, trying to calm his mind of every worst case scenario his mind could conjure and failing miserably. He'd been told by everyone that Genji was in no danger and now that he was here in the doctor's care he would be more than fine. Hanzo wished that was enough to calm his irrational fears.

 

“He'll be alright. Genji's taken plenty of hits and come out fine. He's tough, and not just the cybernetics.” Jesse was sitting and smoking, watching Hanzo pace.

 

He stopped, his face going tense as he stared at the floor. “It..is not just the fact he will be “alright”, I do not like...” The words were struggling to come out.

 

Jesse paused inhaling on the cigar and raised a brow at him.

 

“I thought I had lost him once before and now...now it is clear that I can still lose him and feel everything all over again.” He ran a hand down his face. “But that is the danger of doing what we do. I cannot stop what may inevitably happen and I cannot ask him to avoid danger. I have no right.”

 

“Hanzo...”

 

He turned to Jesse, a strange truth of it all hitting him. He could lose Genji all over. Maybe not today but someday. He could watch him die in front of him again. If he watched him die once more would his heart, his soul be able to take it?

 

“I have him stabilized.” Angela Ziegler stood at the door, her eyes looking tired.

 

“Can we see him?” Jesse was up and at Hanzo's side, asking what the archer seemed unable to.

 

She shook her head. “Tomorrow. I currently have him sedated while I run all system checks. As far as I can see no life support systems have been damaged. His mobility sensor was shorted and therefore he was having trouble moving his legs and arms.” Angela looked at Hanzo. “I am running a check on everything thoroughly and will keep an eye on him tonight till it's done. He will be the same as always tomorrow.” She offered him a smile.

 

Hanzo nodded, though could only think that Genji was not as he always was. Not anymore. Genji was something else. Something different. “Thank you, Doctor Ziegler.” He willed his body to move and bowed lowly to her, the depth of his gratitude unable to be expressed in words.

 

She looked at him as if conflicted and then nodded, turning to go back into the medbay.

 

Alone in the hall Hanzo turned to leave, his emotions raw and mind still chaotic.

 

“You gonna be alright?” Once again Jesse was at his side. “I can walk you back to your room or we can go find a distraction?” Normally such a comment might have a tone of innuendo but it was sincere as if the cowboy was trying to shake this strange cloud hovering over Hanzo.

 

“I think,” He swallowed hard, “I need a drink.”

 

Jesse smiled and nodded. “I think I can help with that. Come on.” Once more a hand pressed against Hanzo's back, directing him in the direction of the kitchen.

 

 

__________________________________

 

 

Hanzo was three shots in when he started to slow, staring back at Jesse who was nursing his first glass.

 

“Just gonna rush right into it, huh?” The cowboy took a larger drink, still keeping his eyes on Hanzo.

 

“It usually helps when my nerves are like this.” He admitted, pouring another glass. “Though I hardly had time to most days” The threat of assassins had been to great to let himself be drunk save for some days he just didn't care. The night he met Jesse had been one of them. That night he'd decided he didn't care and then he'd met a strange cowboy in a dive bar and somehow ended up in bed with him. He smiled at the memory.

 

“What's so funny?” Jesse raised his brows, his head slightly tilting as he raised the glass to his lips.

 

“I was thinking of the night we met.” He took the next drink slower, sighing.

 

“Yeah?”

 

He nodded. “I still remember wondering if I was that drunk already when I turned and saw a cowboy at the bar.”

 

Jesse laughed and poured another drink. “Well I was wondering why such a gorgeous guy was staring at me.” He raised his glass and winked. “Couldn't resist getting up and coming over.”

 

Hanzo felt a twinge of tension in his chest and downed another drink. He didn't want to admit he enjoyed Jesse's flirting. Looking up he stared at the cowboy from across the table, admiring how appealing he looked relaxed and lounging in the chair as he nursed his drink.

 

“Thought we talked about this.” Jesse smirked, leaning back in his chair but there was a certain look in his eyes that made Hanzo's gut clench. It was quiet for a moment and apparently taking Hanzo's raised brow as confusion Jesse continued. “Thought I told you that you can't look at a man like that.”

 

The memory of their night together a couple weeks ago came back and he looked away, sipping at his glass and struggling to find anything else to focus on but the man across from him. He heard Jesse chuckle and wondered if the man was enjoying teasing him or perhaps it had been a warning. They still had not properly discussed everything. “How...how do I look at you?” He looked up again, the question spilling out of him even though he knew it could lead to far more than he was sure he could deal with at the moment.

 

Jesse's brows were the ones to raise this time and he gave a wry smile as he looked away, thinking. “Kinda depends. Sometimes you look at me like it hurts you. Sometimes it's like you wanna devour me.” He chuckled and finished his drink, pouring another glass before letting his own gaze slide up to stare back at the archer. “And sometimes, like now, you look like you're trying damn hard to not want to jump over this table between us.”

 

There was a knot in his throat and Hanzo struggling to swallow it down, licking his lips subconsciously before looking away again. He was now very insecure about his expressions, wondering how much he let show on his face in front of Jesse. How much did the other see when their eyes met?

 

“Sorry.”

 

The words startled Hanzo and he looked up once more, seeing Jesse looking sheepish and almost finished with the drink he just poured.

 

“Probably shouldn't've taken that bait.” Another sad smile crossed his lips before he finished the drink. “New topic. Tell me something about your home you miss. Something unrelated to your family and all that.”

 

It was a little awkward to just change subjects but he welcomed it. He knew they couldn't keep talking about this without a subject coming up neither of them were sober enough to discuss. He thought a moment about the question before answering. “I miss the ramen. There was a very good place near the local arcade I would go to with Genji sometimes after school. I've never found anywhere else that serves it that good.”

 

“Yeah? Think I know the place you're talkin' 'bout.” Jesse put his feet up on the table as he lit a cigar, sitting back in his seat in a way that Hanzo wondered if the front legs were even on the ground.

 

They continued to drink and talk about everything and nothing. Every time the conversation lulled Jesse came up with a new topic and Hanzo provided the answers he could though it became harder and harder to keep his thoughts straight. He even lost track of how much they drank until Athena informed them it was three in the morning and suggested they retire to bed.

 

Unsteady and flushed the pair got up and started to leave. Hanzo was struggling to stand a little but he had always managed to keep a sense of balance to him even inebriated, Jesse however was unsteady and his large size seemed to do him no favors as he practically crashed into Hanzo.

 

“Sorry. Lemme just lean on ya a bit.” He burried his face in Hanzo's hair as they used one another to balance and head back to their rooms.

 

It was a slow pace, and they stumbled into a few walls, turning down the various halls back to their rooms. Hanzo decided since he was the steadier of the pair he'd help Jesse back to his room first before retiring to his own. He'd almost succeeded, seeing the door coming closer until Jesse tripped on his feet and he struggled to keep them upright. He looped an arm around the man's chest to try and keep him upright but stumbled himself, falling back against the wall thankfully. At least he was thankful till he felt Jesse's entire weight against him, the man's face in his neck as he breathed heavy, his body radiating heat. It left him frozen for a moment.

 

Everything about this was dangerous and yet Hanzo didn't try to push the man away, closing his eyes as he felt Jesse's breath, his lips ghosting over his skin. Slowly they trailed up the long the column of his neck, to the sensitive area below his ear and then he heard that sweet honey voice. “You smell mighty nice.”

 

“Jesse...” Another knot in his throat plagued him, and he shuddered as he turned his head away. He felt Jesse pull away and when he looked the other was staring at him, their foreheads pressed together. It was so intimate and terrifying. This closeness was his weakness. No matter what he told himself he could not bare to push the man way when they were so close. “We...we can't...” He wasn't sure if his head was swimming from the alcohol or just the way the other man made him feel.

 

“I know...” Jesse sighed and bit his lips. “But I...just a little.” He moved his head, their lips so close to one another. “You got me like a man dying of thirst in the desert and you're the oasis.”

 

“The oasis is usually a mirage.” This close his vision was blurred, from booze and from the dizzying heat. He didn't deserve this. The man in front of him deserved more than what Hanzo was.

 

“I'll take the chance.” Those words shattered his reason, almost breaking apart every dark thought Hanzo told himself for why he shouldn't have this. Their lips met in a mad frenzy after that, drunk and sloppy and so perfect.

 

Hanzo clung to Jesse now, the few remaining pieces of his thoughts that tried to fight this far too weak to keep him from giving in. He tangled his fingers in the man's now trim and cleaned hair, still pleased to feel it as soft as before. He focused on that familiar feeling, that comfort. The worries and stress of Genji being hurt, the turmoil over knowing he should not drag Jesse into a doomed future with him falling away.

 

Still unsteady they moved to Jesse's room, falling through the door and onto the bed as if neither of their legs could handle holding them up any longer. It was almost as chaotic as their night several weeks ago but slower. Drunk and overheated he gasped for air between kisses, drowning in the way he fit perfectly against Jesse's body. He wanted his hands to map every inch of the man's form and commit it to memory. Even though he so desperately wanted this he feared it could be taken away so easily. All the worries that had swirled in his head every time they got too close, too dangerously close to becoming something, more were trying to deter him.

 

_You don't deserve him._

 

_He'll leave._

 

_He'll see the man you are and those warm glances will grow cold._

 

_Do you really think you deserve to hold him with hands stained in your own brother's blood?_

 

Hanzo groaned and closed his eyes tighter as if that would drown out the thoughts. He clung tighter as if that might prove Jesse wouldn't disappear.

 

Shifting his weight, Jesse's leg pressed between Hanzo's as their kiss broke and the cowboy nuzzled along Hanzo's throat.

 

He wanted to let that distract him, arching his back as he moaned, feeling Jesse's mouth at his ear, hot and wet and sending shudders of pleasure through his skin.

 

_Such a selfish and pathetic man._

 

_You failed your family._

 

_You failed your brother_

 

_And you'll fail him too._

 

He gasped, but the sharp inhalation of breath was not pleasure but the unmistakable shudder that followed when the pain grew too much. His eyes stung and he blinked, feeling the warm wetness spill over. His breath came out in another trembling gasp.

 

It was enough to stop Jesse and the cowboy sat up, looking down at him. “Hanzo? Darlin' what...”

 

He couldn't stop shaking, couldn't stop the tears. Jesse. Jesse and Genji. What could either of them want with a pathetic coward like him? Even this was so pathetically shameful he reached up to cover his face, the sobs coming out harder now.

 

“Hey. Hey hey hey, it's okay. It's okay.” Gentle whispers followed kisses to Hanzo's hands and slowly Jesse pried them from Hanzo's face so he could wipe at the tears. “It's okay. Just let it out.”

 

His expression pinched tightly and he leaned up to bury his face in Jesse's chest, letting the tears he refused to let out for years come.

 

“It's alright, Darlin'. I got ya. I got you.” Enveloped in the man's embrace Hanzo cried, letting out everything he had tried to hold in all day from the moment he saw Genji being wheeled off the carrier. The sorrow he felt when he told Jesse to forget their night together weeks ago. He just couldn't hold it in any longer.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna be completely honest. I had no idea that would happen at the end. I had about three scenarios in my head on how that drunken scene would go and none of them ended with Hanzo breaking down and yet when I sat down to write it this felt like the natural progression of Hanzo and their relationship. So I hope everyone enjoys this and look forward to the next chapter cause things are really starting to change for our boy Hanzo.
> 
> Thank you for all the comments and kudos even when I was a bum and didn't update. It really helped. I'll try and stick to my schedule this time and give you all the epic finale you are hoping for. See you next chapter.


	13. The Morning After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Last night Hanzo finally lost his composure. Now with hangovers and feelings raw Hanzo faces Jesse in the morning for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY.
> 
> I did not mean for such a long break between chapters but a lot of personal stuff went down. Depression session fell in and it was hard to motivate myself to write then some personal stuff with work happened. So again I am so sorry this took so long. I am going to work to make sure I get the next 3-4 chapters of this fic out in a timely manner. Its getting so close to being done and I'm so excited to share it all with you. Depression be damned. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who's been sticking with me. I truly appreciate it. but enough about me you're here to read so GO GO GO!

His head was pounding. The dull throb was constant and as he shifted he groaned slightly at the sudden sharp pain that jolted through his temple and behind his eyes. The heat under him was comfortable and he pressed his face into it as if that might calm the ache. It was strange, he didn't remember having a heated blanket or pillow but this radiated heat, and it smelt different. The scent was like rich spice and alcohol and smoke...wait. His eyes snapped open and he immediately regretted it, closing them as he groaned once more.

 

That's right. Last night he'd been distraught over Genji so he and Jesse started drinking and when they tried to go back to their rooms...oh god. The memory of him not only letting himself be weak and fall into bed with Jesse yet again, but also to break down like that made him flush with shame. He needed to sneak out, now. He couldn't face Jesse like this.

 

Slowly he tried to shift his leg back so he could just roll off the bed. As he started to tilt his body he felt the arm on his shoulder hold firm.

 

“Don't.”

 

The gruff voice gave him pause and Hanzo froze.

 

“Just lay down and sit a bit. I ain't gonna do nothin'.” Jesse's voice was rough and dry sounding, a testament to how much they'd drank last night.

 

He wasn't sure what to do but he relaxed back against him, staring at the wall near the bed. The last time he ended up in bed with Jesse he'd woken first and was able to slip away and compose himself. Right now he was vulnerable. Exposed.

 

“How ya feelin'? Bet your head is killing you if you're as bad off as me.” There was a clear tone of discomfort in the other man's voice.

 

“It..is unpleasant, yes.” Hanzo had been momentarily distracted from the pain but it was coming back.

 

“Unpleasant? That's sure as shit a nicer way to put it then what I was thinking.” Jesse laughed and then followed with a groan as his apparent pain intensified. “Damn, haven't really put it away like that in a while.”

 

He felt a tiny bit of guilt at being the reason they drank so much. He had thought he'd been dealing with Genji's injury but then his drunken mind had been too weak to all the doubts and fears he'd been trying to hide. He shifted to try and sit up, his head throbbing harder to the point he wondered if his pulse was going too fast. It drowned out every noise for a long while.

 

Behind Hanzo, Jesse also moved, sitting up and leaned back on his pillows. “Feeling any better besides the pounding head?” His tone held an unasked question. Perhaps it was the man merely being considerate. Not to bring up a subject Hanzo did not wish to discuss.

 

It was tempting to say he was fine like always but that was just more running. He only ran and deflected. “I...feel embarrassed for my shameful display last night.”

 

“Shameful?” Jesse sat up more, leaning toward Hanzo. “Ain't nothing shameful about what happened last night. I'm actually surprised it took that long. I..I kinda, well, I kinda thought you might sorta open up and wanna talk about everything more, but then we just kept drinking and I went and brought up stuff I know I shouldn't've.”

 

“No, we have discussed speaking on the matter. It was inevitable such a thing would come up. I welcomed the distraction since I did not wish to think about Genji and...my fears.” He felt that familiar ache in his chest. That indicator that something was wrong, that he feared and worried. Normally he ignored it and pushed it aside but what was the point now? What did he have to hide in front of Jesse?

 

“Yeah, but it felt like I was taking advantage of the situation. I shouldn't have pushed things in the hall. We were drunk and you weren't in a good spot and-”

 

“Jesse.” Hanzo turned, finally meeting the man's eyes. “I...I am also responsible. For last night and before.” He frowned, closing his eyes. “I've been unfair to you.”

 

“Well, yeah but I guess I get it. You got some hangups you gotta work through. I mean, I'm the last person who can complain about that. I got enough demons nipping at my own heels to last a lifetime.” Reaching over he grabbed a cigar, chewing on it for a moment as he grabbed his lighter. “I half expected it be a while before we actually had a proper talk about it all.”

 

It seemed Jesse had given this a lot more thought than Hanzo had. While he agreed they'd speak on this he was putting off thinking on it properly. “You are too forgiving.” Hanzo finally sighed.

 

“Maybe but I like to think you're worth the trouble.” Jesse smiled, sitting back again and sucked in the smoke from the cigar. Blowing it out he let out a little sigh. “Was it just Genji that set you off or was there something else? You kept saying sorry over and over but I wasn't quite sure if it was to me or...” He let the question hang between them.

 

Hanzo vaguely remembered it. He'd been distraught and lost in his own dark thoughts to really try and restrain his words. “It was to you and Genji and...perhaps my father and mother. I do not really know. I felt as if I could no longer hold myself together.” That same tension in his throat from last night came back. “Jesse, you would do better to place your affections elsewhere.”

 

“Nope.” The answer was so quick that it made Hanzo turn to face him again. Jesse was looking back at him in a way that was new. It was determined and stern. “Look you can tell me it over and over but that don't mean I'm gonna listen to you. I meant what I said last night. I'm willing to take the chance.”

 

“But I do not deserve-” he silenced himself, afraid to speak it out loud.

 

“Don't deserve what?”

 

It would be easy to not say. To deflect again, but if he did would he _ever_ move forward? Last night it was clear he could not continue this way. “I do not deserve you.” He said it finally as his fingers curled into fists on his thighs, his eyes closing tight as if waiting to hear the man's agreement. He'd surely see.

 

“That's such bullshit. The hell you mean I don't deserve you? Who's to say _I_ deserve _you_ for that matter?” Jesse's leg slipped off the bed and he sat up, snuffing the cigar out quickly. “Is this what's got you all twisted up about us?”

 

“It is not trivial!” Hanzo snapped, his head turning to glare at Jesse. “I am not a man who deserves such things. I have done terrible things and I have played the victim and coward to my own shortcomings. Even now I have allowed myself to reach a point where I cry like a child.”

 

“Hanzo, that ain't...that's just being human. No one can deal with everything all the time and sometimes you just don't have the time.” Raking his fingers through his hair, Jesse scooted closer, resting a hand on Hanzo's thigh. “Look, I don't know how you see yourself. I thought I did, but now I'm realizin' I only know a fraction of what makes you what you are. To me I thought you were so confident it borderlined on arrogant, but it suited you. You got all the skill to back it up and that's not even brushing on your looks. I'll be the first to sing your praises over that.” he smiled.

 

Hanzo couldn't help but feel his lips turn up a little, though his amusement did not reach anywhere else on his face.

 

“You talk about yourself now like you're the most despicable person ever and I'm some saint but, Darlin', I can assure you that ain't the case. I'm...scum really.” Jesse's voice cracked a little. “I've done some real messed up shit, some in Deadlocks and some in Blackwatch. Sure I was following orders but I still did it. I lied and killed for both organizations. Maybe Blackwatch dressed it up a bit but in the end it was the same. Even being a vigilante left a lot of grey area, so don't go making me sound like someone above you cause I'm not.”

 

“Jesse.” It broke Hanzo's heart a little to hear this, to realize that while he'd been wallowing in his own self doubt Jesse was also struggling with this. He saw himself in the same way Hanzo did. “You are a good man.”

 

“Yeah? Well so are you.” The cowboy countered, leaning closer. “So let's agree on that. We're both good men that are trying even though we've done some fucked up shit.” He chuckled a little, giving Hanzo a wry smile.

 

How did the other make everything sound so simple? Hanzo couldn't understand it. He struggled with things so greatly and then Jesse just made it seem so easy. He took all the complication of a winding road and made it straight and clear.

 

When Hanzo didn't answer Jesse continued, leaning closer as his fingers traced along Hanzo's jaw. “It might sound selfish but I kinda also want you to agree cause...well, if you don't deserve this that doesn't leave a lot of hope for me.” His voice grew softer. “I don't think I deserve this either, but I'm selfish enough to ignore that in hopes that maybe I'm wrong. It's the one thing I wanna be wrong about.”

 

Hanzo's heart was in his throat, closing his eyes to bask in the gentle vibration of Jesse's voice, to let his words take root in his mind and push away his own doubts. When he opened his eyes again Jesse was staring right back at him and he found himself leaning forward.

 

The loud beeping of an incoming call startled them both and they pulled away both glaring at the comm on the nightstand. Jesse cursed and grabbed it. “Damn, it's Angie.” He huffed and answered. “Yeah?”

 

Hanzo bit his lip, the tense moment before still fresh in his mind.

 

“Yeah he's here. We got a bit tossed last night and barely made it to a room.” Laughing, Jesse glanced at Hanzo a little worried. Perhaps afraid Hanzo would be angry at others knowing what transpired. “I'll tell him. We'll be there in a bit. Yeah...Thanks, Angie. See ya then.” He hung up. “Genji is awake. Angie tried to contact ya but you left your comm in the kitchen and they couldn't find ya in your room.”

 

“Ah.” Hanzo nodded, feeling another wave of embarrassment.

 

“She said we can go see Genji. You wanna get cleaned up first or just head on over?” As if also hyper aware of what had almost happened, Jesse withdrew a little.

 

“A shower would be welcome.” Hanzo finally said, eyeing the other man. “Could I borrow yours?”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Your shower, may I use it?” He spoke again, a little amused by Jesse's surprise.

 

“Oh, yeah. Go ahead.” Still thrown off, Jesse's gaze followed Hanzo as he stood. The archer only got halfway to the bathroom door before the cowboy seemed to gain his bearings again though. “Ya don't need any help in there, do ya?”

 

Hanzo stopped, smirking as he looked back. “Don't push your luck.”

 

“Don't know how not to, Darlin'” He winked and sat back on the bed, apparently content to let the offer drop.

 

 

__________________________________

 

 

Angela smiled at them as they walked in. “Glad to see you both. He's doing quite well.” She lead them over to where Genji was sitting up, his visor off and a smile on his face.

 

Jesse saw Hanzo let out a sigh of relief and his shoulders relax. The entire way over the elder Shimada had tried to remain impassive but Jesse could tell after watching the man for as long as he had that Hanzo was putting on a mask. Last night alone had shaken him a little. In a good way though. He'd been distressed seeing Hanzo in tears, struggling to hide it even though there was no way he could. There hadn't been much else he could do but hold Hanzo and whisper soothing words. After the tears had stopped they'd laid there as Jesse stroked Hanzo's hair until he noticed the man's breathing even out.

 

When he woke this morning he dared not move. He had half expected Hanzo to be gone when he woke up like he had the last two times they'd ended up in bed together. Only difference was that nothing really happened physically last night, but that didn't men it meant nothing. As far as he was concerned they'd crossed a milestone. Hanzo hadn't left, they'd talked, and Jesse had gotten a bit closer to finding out the reason the other was pushing back so hard.

 

“You look alive.” Hanzo said cooly though the tension in his tone said a lot more than maybe he meant it to.

 

Genji seemed to understand and laughed. “I was a little careless. Apparently the sensor was already jostled from a few earlier fights and instead of getting it checked I ignored it.” He glanced at Angela who had a stern look.

 

“And perhaps you will take your monthly maintenance check a little more seriously then.”  
The doctor crossed her arms. “I have warned you that while all the cybernetics are top grade they need regular checks. Too many hits and they begin to weaken and must be repaired or replaced.” Her eyebrow raised accusingly.

 

“Yes, I am sorry, Doctor Ziegler.” For once Genji seemed apologetic and lowered his head to her before glancing at his brother. “I am sorry to worry you.”

 

Hanzo visibly stiffened, his face seemed to tense before his eyes narrowed and he looked away from Genji. “It is...not something I care to repeat. You would do well to listen to the doctor.”

 

Genji seemed a little surprised but then a sad smile crossed his face as if noticing finally how puffy and bruised his brother's eyes still looked. “I will. I'm sorry to worry you, Anija.”

 

Jesse's brows rose because when Genji spoke Hanzo seemed to jump a little before smiling just a bit. “You gave us all a bit of a rustlin'. Best listen to the doc and make sure everything is working A-OK.”

 

“You are the last person to be reprimanding another on safety, Jesse McCree.” Angela's voice was stern. “I have warned you about the effects of smoking on your body many times.”

 

Surprised to find his playful ribbing thrown back at him he stared at the doctor sheepish, hearing Hanzo chuckle next to him. “Well, a man's gotta have a few vices.”

 

“Then learn to take fewer a day.” She countered.

 

He wanted to argue but hearing Hanzo still chuckling next to him shut him up. He decided he much preferred to hear Hanzo laugh at his expense then to argue with Angie over his smoking habits. At this rate things might start looking up. Once they could sit down and have a proper talk he was sure he could finally break down that last wall Hanzo was struggling to let fall.

 

 

__________________________________

 

 

“Something happened.”

 

Genji's comment made Hanzo look up from the mission report he was putting in for Genji, his brother needing to sit for a few system checks “Just in case” the Doctor had insisted. Hanzo had agreed to stay and push for his brother to finish his report though it was an excuse. He wanted to be near him so his mind knew Genji was fine. “What?”

 

“Between you and McCree. Something happened.” Grinning, Genji's eyes held a hint of amusement and mischief in them.

 

Hanzo only frowned but his mind went through the events of last night and this morning, and he swallowed hard, looking away. “Things are...”

 

“Don't try and make it sound like something it isn't. I don't know if you are aware but you were practically plastered to his side when you came in.” The younger Shimada chuckled. “I am happy for you, Anija. Jesse is a good man. I think he suits you.”

 

“We are not...we are not together.” He clarified, unaware that the heat in his face may be followed by a slight flush.

 

“But you want to be. Don't deny it.” Pointing a finger Genji leaned forward. “Do you realize how you were watching him when he left? I wish I hadn't noticed. It's a little disturbing to see my brother smitten with a good friend.”

 

“I am not smitten.” Hanzo denied, sitting up straight.

 

“Lies.”

 

Growling Hanzo slipped back deeper in his seat though his expression quickly softened. “He is a good man.” He finally said, staring at the far wall. “I do not know how to handle someone so honest with their feelings. It is...overwhelming but also welcome. I fear I do not know how to reciprocate.”

 

That seemed to hit a cord with Genji and the man nodded. “We are not in the Shimada clan anymore. We need not fear who our heart desires. There is no one there to tell you you can't.”

 

“I do not know how to love someone.” Hanzo's words hung over them, both of them understanding the sentiment. When you were not allowed to fall in love, to chase a crush or a feeling and only think of the family, you never learned how to deal with love if it ever happened.

 

“It's never too late to learn, Anija.” Genji finally reached over to place a hand on Hanzo's. “That's the beauty of the freedom we now have. We can learn how to live another way.”

 

Hanzo's brown eyes met his brother's and he finally sighed. “I am envious of you.”

 

“What?”

 

He looked away again. “Your freedom. You learned how to be long before I did and I still seem to stumble through it daily.”

 

“It's not a competition.” Genji smiled weakly though he still seemed thrown by Hanzo's admission. “You will learn in your own time. As my master says patience is it's own reward.”

 

Hanzo didn't turn for a long moment but suddenly a smile spread over his lips. “A lesson you are still learning.”

 

“Rude.” The cyborg said the word flatly and shoved his brother. “The lesson is things do not happen over night. My own lack of patience at times does not mean I am unaware of that.”

 

“Ah, so you admit you have a lack of patience.” For the first time in their conversation there seemed to be a familiar gleam in Hanzo's eyes, like when they'd been children.

 

Caught by his own words Genji fumbled over his next words before cursing.

 

Hanzo just laughed, pleased to have won even a little though his mind was still processing his brother's words.

 

It was never too late to learn.

 

 

__________________________________

 

 

Things unfortunately did not calm down after the mission that saw half the team meet the Doomfist. Winston had been gathering information based on all their missions and they'd been thrown into harder training that left them with little time to themselves. All they were told was a big mission was coming up that required all members.

 

That also meant that Hanzo had not had much of a chance to think over his and Jesse's prior conversation or to even talk more. They ate together and spared or competed on the shooting range but there did not ever seem to be a proper time to talk. He could tell the cowboy wanted to. Hanzo had not missed the looks, even allowing himself to spare some that lingered just a bit too long.

 

By the third day they were called for a meeting, the entire crew listening in as Winston explained the situation.

 

“This is the company Lumerico. You may have heard about their previous CEO resigning after several instances of embezzlement and bribery were brought to light. It is now being run by the previous Department Coordinator Arturo Castano until another CEO can be appointed.” He flipped the images to one of a man of medium build with a mustache and thick glasses. While he seemed unassuming enough the next comment from the gorilla changed that view. “I have uncovered many emails, thanks to Miss Vaswani's cooperation. In these emails it seems as if Vishkar has dealings with Mister Castano and are pushing to make him the permanent CEO.”

 

“So a puppet leader?” It was Hana who spoke first, her usual aloof expression replaced by a serious one. She was sitting back in her chair with her arms crossed, glancing at Winston.

 

“In a sense. It seems after the public blow of their previous CEO caught stealing money from the people the company itself is struggling to maintain a positive image with the people. Vishkar seemed to have extended their hand in helping, uh, correct the people's views. Though the details of that are outside of what I found.” The gorilla glanced at Satya apologetically.

 

The woman in question had a stern expression, her eyes facing forward but it was clear her shoulders were tense. The more it was uncovered that her previous place of occupation was less pure than it seemed the more it seemed to unnerve her.

 

“So what is Vishkar wantin' out of this. I'm sure that's where we come in.” Jesse was chewing on a toothpick, leftover from lunch, in favor of not getting yelled at for chewing on cigars.

 

“That is what I am unsure of. It seemed that another third party had some correspondence with Vishkar and in turn Vishkar asked the Lumerico company a favor. It seemed there was a package exchange but that is where my information goes cold. Due to certain similar coding signatures I am sure the third party is Talon and whatever they are having Lumerico hold for them is important.” Winston adjusted his glasses. “I know asking for the entire team seems extreme but if Talon is involved it's possible we may be facing any number of opponents. The Reaper, Windowmaker, Doctor O'Deorain and even Doomfist himself. I want to have enough manpower to withstand them if it comes to it.”

 

That seemed to hang heavy on them. The idea that they may be facing some or all of the people they'd run across over several missions seemed to get under many of their skins. Hanzo personally hoped Doomfist did not appear. The man had hurt his brother and he knew if he had the chance he may get reckless. There was also the Reaper who seemed to have some connection to Jesse. He'd been unsure if he could ask, but for he man's sake he hoped they did not meet that dark figure again.

 

“I will send the debriefing paperwork to you datapads. Please look them over. We leave tomorrow evening.

 

“That soon?” It was Lena who spoke now.

 

Winston nodded. “Yes, I believe that Talon is supposed to secure the cargo Lumerico is holding by then. We need to intercept it before they do.”

 

“Why not just go in tonight? We can leave now and be there during the wee hours.” Torbjorn questioned.

 

“I thought of that but it seems the factory where the cargo is held will have a skeleton crew tomorrow evening. Most likely because they do not want anyone seeing the Talon members take it. We will use that same opening to get it before them.” Winston shuffled his feet a little, his expression unsettled. “As much as I wish we could, um, rush in guns blazing, as you would say, we must still maintain a sense of inconspicuousness. We are all still in breach of the Petras Act and if caught we all could face dire consequences. I would like to avoid that at all costs.”

 

“So we sneak in with the worker crew spread thin, steal the cargo before Talon and get out before they catch us. Seems like we got a mighty slim window.” Jesse sat back, almost putting his feet up on the table before catching himself.

 

“What, getting scared, Jesse?” Fareeha, clapped a hand on his shoulder.

 

“Not even close, I'm just worried about your rookie ass having trouble keeping up.” He looked up at her with a grin.

 

“Alright, enough jibber jabbing. We got a mission to ready ourselves for. You young ones can flap your lip and brag after we get this job done.” Torbjorn threw a stern look at the pair before he jumped as Reinhardt's large hand landed on his head.

 

“Hush my tiny friend. Let them fire themselves up. It's more fun that way.” The large German laughed even as his hand was shoved off the small dwarf's head.

 

With the tension broken a little they all silently seemed to be preparing themselves for an unknown outcome.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will be working on the next chapter this week and get it out as soon as I can. I don't have a solid release date but hopefully it will be in a few days. SEE YOU ALL THEN.


End file.
